Aut Vincere Aut Mori
by SpellboundWinter
Summary: After a long summer spent in Happy Volts, Gary is back at Bullworth. Fueled by grudges and teen angst, he wants to rule Bullworth as it was intended. Emulating Caligula, will he be just as mad as a leader? Of course. But then there's Helen of Troy standing in his way and many bumps in the road, all leading to one goal. As they say: Aut vincere, aut mori. For victory or for death.
1. Moram Fatum Meum

Failure.

As he opened his eyes, he didn't see a familiar ceiling with cracking plaster or a ceiling fan spinning sporadically above his head. He didn't hear a whole horde of idiots running about in the halls of his dorm. He didn't hear his alarm clock ring at eight sharp. He didn't hear a tv, cranked on such a low volume, as if it were a secret. Olympics being broadcasted so a certain someone could fawn. He didn't hear laughing or sneering. Didn't hear Jimmy and Petey getting into a spat.

He could almost see them under his eyelids, they were sitting on that worn out, grimy couch.

Smiling.

Scum.

He didn't revere them as friends.

Objects, more like.

Friends were for the weak that could not stand on their own.

Gary was above them. Figuratively and literally. He was there. He was standing on the scaffolding, looking down on the chaos.

Chaos that he created.

Chaos that he concocted from his mind.

But this wasn't Bullworth. This was worse. He saw grey walls, dust dancing in beams of light from the small barred windows that were simply too far out of reach.

He saw failure.

He saw flaws in a perfected plan.

When he moved, his joints popped and squeaked. He slowly fiddled with his hands and every so often bouncing in place.

Everything seemed so quiet. His voice weak and his throat sore from the night before. Screaming again, struggling like a fish gasping for air, pleading and yelling. Letting out teen angst. They made a mistake. He was head boy. Dr. Crabblesnitch really believed all that junk and Gary was untouchable then. His tongue was forked, soaked in honey. Able to soothe and lie but able to cut down in an instant.

And now…

Gary has reasoned that what happened at Bullworth wasn't that bad. It wasn't really a civil war… okay, it was. But he was so close to making Jimmy out to be the worst student, a bully even, to have ever attended! Becoming a king. A ruler. Instead he was dethroned and assassinated like Caligula.

He loved Rome.

It was hedonistic, sure. But the way Caligula brutalized his enemies and took control. If he could have, he would have. He would take the role as Caligula did. Pulling out their eyes, ripping out their tongue, or cutting off ears. And if Gary was feeling merciful, he'd bury some alive, impaling and, of course, crucifying degenerates.

He wished he had one of his many books with him. He remembered learning about Caesar and other rulers of Rome. It gave him an idolized purpose. They were geniuses. Just like Gary.

But Caligula died. Gary was alive

Here. Again.

More pills. More meds. More cycles of medication. More withdrawals. More time talking to the ringmaster of this goddamn circus. That doctor. He didn't know anything about him. He would sit there in that musty chair, and Gary would either lie or sit there, full of insubordination. Of course, why would Gary tell him any truth? It was more fun watching someone try to piece together an assortment of half truths and lies, only to fail at diagnosing him.

Even if he were to tell the truth, he was skeptical. He wasn't his first psychologist.

It made him feel superior.

But the more they both talked, the more it came back to his failings.

And it all comes back to Bullworth.

He hadn't even incited those animals against each other as much as he could of. All that planning. Notebooks full of ideas. Pages of scheming. Trying to figure out as much as he could. Dig up as much dirt as possible. Bribing. Threatening. Blackmailing. Befriending only to swiftly backstab.

He wanted that place to burn.

It deserved to.

Yet there he was. Happy Volts Asylum. Home for the mentally unwell.

But just like Caligula, Happy Volts was nursing a viper in it's bosom.

He could hear the faint noises of screams. Block B was a really great place. It had all the accommodations a violent psychopath would need. Including fluffy lined walls.

Gary sat there. Planning. Thinking about how he would exactly leave. He didn't like the small cups of pills. It made it hard to think. Too hard to think. Before when he would receive them in the rec room, he would fake taking them and sling them for information or favors.

Until someone ratted him out. Some good goodey doer.

Those sneaky bastards

And the way the orderlies would grab your cheeks and forcefully search your mouth. They would practically give an oral search to swallow just one pill. Gary had always debated clenching his teeth down on a prying hand and, like a feral animal, have blood bubble in his mouth like a geyser.

He smirked at the thought.

Even though he was somber and sedated, the thought of biting one of those orderlies sparked a little amusement.

He couldn't remember the last time he smiled.

Happy Volts it was…

It was too boring for him.

He hated that word.

Boring is what Jimmy had called him.

When Jimmy said that, he remembered clenching his fists, ready to kill.

Was he? Boring. Was he too sedated or was he losing his edge?

He missed the smells, voices and sounds of Bullworth. The sounds of screams, the smells of lit fires and the rumble of a school's crumbling social ladder.

Jimmy didn't understand that it took more than just brawn to run a school, but genius and intellect and he obviously didn't have that.

Gary had it.

Jimmy was ridiculous, offensive and demeaning.

With the sounds of keys and a groan from the door, an orderly stepped in. Unannounced, too. Gary, charming as ever spouted, "oh, great! Company. Come in friend! Are you going to zap the bad boy out of me? Am I ready for the famous Happy Volts electroshock therapy?"

The orderly didn't emote. Mostly because of the surgical mask in front of his face. They looked so sterile. So boring.

Scum.

"Hey, meathead. Did you get that? Or are you deaf?"

The orderly materialized a cup from behind his back. Gary nearly jumped out of his skin. If there was something that terrified Gary, it was those medicinal capsules of assorted colors.

"No thanks, I think I've ingested enough chemicals for one month." When the orderly didn't move, it frightened Gary even more, "you better hope they're suppositories because I'm not swallowing them numbnuts!"

One orderly became two as another emerged from the door.

Gary flailed, like a vampire fleeing from garlic on a braid. It was going to be one of those kind of doses.

Forcefully.

And like a predator pouncing on a wildebeest, clammy purple gloved hands found their way around his cheeks, forcing him to open wide. The muscle relaxers or whatever they gave him, the medication made his muscles feel like heavy weights, like heavy knuckles dragging on the ground.

The orderly that had refused to emote anything, clearly didn't appreciate Gary's brilliance. He carefully placed pills on his tongue, sliding them all the way to the back of his throat. As Gary pushed back on the man in front of him, he started to mutter and yell to get off of him. The orderly performing an act of disparity, tears were welling up in his eyes as he was unable to keep the orderlies fat finger from sliding down the crux of his throat.

And then. Somewhere in Gary. Deep, deep down, that flame lit again.

And it burned so bright.

Like a fucking sun.

He wasn't boring.

He wasn't just going to rot here.

He needed to go home. Home to Bullworth.

He grabbed the orderly behind him by the crotch and, simultaneously, he found the strength to bite down on the finger feeding him. The orderly finally had some emotion and the thrill of seeing a face contort into pain and the man scream in surprise. It gave Gary pleasure in undefined ways. He felt the glove rip from the finger. The taste of nitrile and iron burned his senses. His tongue lapped the blood from his sharp incisors.

And like a spitting cobra, Gary spewed the blood back at the man.

With quick senses, he spotted the door was more than just ajar. It was open. They didn't lock it behind them.

Their loss, his win.

And before he knew it, he was out in the hallway. A smile graced his lips as he busted through doors and ran through more and more hallways. Gallivanting. Finally making it to the rec room. And with a deep breath, pointing at all the crazies huddled around a tv - that turned back to look at Gary and his commotion.

He let out a satisfied yell.

"I win, losers! I WIN! I'm back! I'm going t-"

However, four orderlies cut the achievement short, including the orderly with blood and spit dripping from his surgical mask. They piled onto the sixteen year old, as if something had possessed Gary. And something did. The orderlies attempted to grab onto whatever they could. Hair, arms, legs.

Gary writhed in absolute glee.

Gary was unstoppable.

It wasn't a real go at breaking out

He had it.

The flame.

He wasn't getting boring.

This was just what he needed.

As the needle was injected into his arm, he welcomed the rush of warm fluid and the familiar haze.

The sensation was too much to scream, so instead he laughed and laughed.

Homecoming wouldn't be too far away.

His throne would be awaiting him.

He'd take it back by force

By fire and brimstone if he had to.

It couldn't be stopped.


	2. Quo Vadis

It had been a few weeks after the incident with the orderlies. He'd been under observation for however long. He couldn't even take a piss without someone's eyes on him.

They were always there. Having to speak to other crazies in hushed voices.

His parents would come to see him, only to listen to those stupid monthly evaluations. Not a word spoken. They weren't afraid to open their wallet and checkbook, but not their hearts for their dear old son.

It was probably better that way. They just looked on in disappointment.

Besides, Gary didn't have anything to say to them.

They were part of the problem.

However, he started to think more… maybe because the orderlies wouldn't dare place their fingers in his mouth and he could spit out most, if not all, the medicine.

All that thinking helped him devise a plan.

That he was 'fixed'.

He didn't have to be here.

So he decided he would pretend.

And the openness that Gary was revealing, to the kind doctor, like his father touching him when he was younger and his mother beating him while she was drunk. Feigning tears the entire time. Crocodile tears.

Snot and tears leaking from his orifices, ugly sobs leaving his lips.

A breakthrough.

All lies albeit, and that bastard, he really thought he had been making progress. A breakthrough. Fixing him. He was fine. He didn't need his meds.

He wasn't confined to that damn padded room anymore. He wasn't Johnny or Jimmy. He wasn't a raging psychopath. But even now, he couldn't have shoe laces, couldn't have proper cutlery, maybe because the doctor knew… somewhere deep inside his pretentious head, that Gary would use them to kill, hurt and maim rather than commit suicide.

Suicide was for the weak.

Friends for the weak.

Love.

Unending appreciation and worship, he was made for it.

And the hurt. The unsightly purple bruises always fade to yellow, the swelling betwixt Gary's striking features always returns to the same glower.

Besides, Gary's pride had suffered a better blow.

Finally. Things were looking up.

He was seated between someone fifty pounds heavier and fifty lighter than him. The small man was biting his fingers because there wasn't anything left of his nails. His name was Otto. And the big fat guy? Vacant. His name was Leon.

A lot of the townies would come and go. Released and then taken back in. Mostly because of low income and bad neighborhoods and shit like that.

It was the same old song and dance. It was their choice to be fuck ups.

Gary didn't like those dropouts. And they didn't like him… unless he had some pills to spare.

Gary shoveled more of the brightly colored fruit into his mouth. Occasionally stabbing the cup with a plastic spoon. Imagining it to be Dr. Happy's face. Every minute or two he would glance at the tv that had seen better days. Even the rabbit ears were fucked up and duck taped. Probably some crazy moron had some kind of psychological break or something.

There wasn't much else to do. The patients were either too stupid or drugged to provide any good conversation. Although they spoke when it came to Gary's meds.

Gary sucked whatever flavor he could savor from the plastic spoon, eyes darting to the cold husks.

Scum.

They were shifty morons.

He had also managed to make the orderlies stop treating him like a dog, forcing themselves down his throat. After he started to make himself vomit at the mere touch of their digits to his pink muscle, they didn't bother looking too hard into his mouth.

Gary made it clear he was responsible to take his meds… well, to appear so. He was good at hiding them, sticking them into a hole into his mattress. ADD meds to vitamins to softeners, there was a person that would greedily take more than they were already offered… for a price, Gary thought.

These losers would take more than a recommended amount because it would bring them a faint happiness. Or a high. Who actually gave a shit?

He eyed the swim meet on TV, thinking back to Pete. Then thinking back to Jimmy.

Jimmy. Pete.

Those… scum.

It made his blood boil. And he had to pretend to be some damaged and battered fucktoy with daddy issues. He slurped what was left of the fruits and with a sleight of hand, forced two pills in the empty plastic container. Tossing the remnants of the sticky liquid and plastic into the lap of Otto. Grey, empty eyes suddenly came to life.

Otto's nipped and bloody fingers collecting liquid and pills in a satisfying scoop. Gary jabbed the man's side and the man tweaked his head to him. His eyes darting everywhere before dropping a key in his lap. Otto continued to lap at his digits like a starving dog getting scraps.

Gary took the key in hand and stood up, strolling back to his room to contemplate his next move. The correct order of words.

He'd act like an idiot or a monkey putting on a show. He'll dance.

To make them pay.

He imagined breaking off the end of a plastic spoon and forcing it into Jimmy's aorta, and blood would fountain from the wound. Thoughts that entailed maiming and hurting the kid.

The orderly interrupted his innocent thinking and simply spoke, "Session starts in five."

"Thanks. What a pal."

When he continued on his way, wringing his hands, he felt as though the orderly crept behind him. Gary felt his hair stand on end… not because of fear but because of how much poison he could have spit at him in defense.

"It's not that way, Smith."

"No need to be a brute, friend. I'm just confused on which way his office is. It is a rather large facility here. I am still new here after all."

The brute grunted, and grabbed Gary like a gorilla would grab its young, dragging him by the collar and to the nice psychiatrist for another drawn out lie to sweeten the stay.

Not too long now.

But with the key, at least he could sneak into the head office of the kind doctor.

He could have a whole lot of fun in there.


	3. In Ante Portas

Crisp autumn air filled his lungs as he stepped out of the cab that his parents so graciously called for. His own parents were too busy to pick him up out of the asylum, so here he was.

All alone.

Such a sob story.

All there was to celebrate his return was this stupid cab.

It was a sign of how today was going to go.

Gary fiddled with his medical band before ripping it off. Finally free of his shackles.

Even the entrance to Bullworth was intimidating. Almost as its own entity. Looking straight into Gary's egotistical soul.

He noticed the familiar, yet friendly, gargoyle glaring at Gary. Maybe almost welcoming him. At least he liked to think.

Better than his parents. And with a better glare.

He slugged his worn out duffle bag higher onto his shoulder. He didn't even look back at the taxi. The ride was like any other. Uneventful. Trying to talk to the cabbie and getting into a spat with him when he wouldn't acknowledge him.

As he approached the gates, the wroth iron greeted Gary with a groan as it opened.

Even from here, Gary could see some students meandering back and forth from dorms to the head building and back.

And he was back.

He was 'fixed'.

He took a breath before stepping into campus, finding it to be a little too over whelming. He couldn't stop clenching and unclenching his fists. His jaw already sore from grinding his teeth.

With each step he could feel himself getting closer and closer to his throne. If Gary could, he would have long nights spent above in the bell tower, hanging degenerates, their bodies strung up as an effigy to his accomplishments.

Gary let out a comfortable hum, finding himself fiddling with his hands. Watching as people stopped mid step, nearly dropping their jaws, gawking as if he were a walking apparition.

He was there. Really back after all the chaos.

He would get to work on making himself better with each clique.

What were they again?

Right, they were the nerds, bullies, preppies, greasers and then the jocks.

How could he forget?

He would have to win over each faction if he had hopes of being head boy.

They didn't have to love him and respect him but they had to fear him.

Gary heard a shrill voice snap him back to reality as he looked up, he almost barreled right into Ms. Danvers.

She hadn't changed. That's for sure.

"Mr. Smith."

"Ms. Danvers, what a-"

"Stop dawdling! Dr. Crabblesnitch is waiting for you. I am to see you to it." She turned on her heel, her voice rather sing-song as she clasped her hands together, "We wouldn't want to keep the good headmaster waiting any longer than he should!"

Gary clamped his mouth shut. The only thing that old whore cared about was making tea and serving that senile old fool. He felt as though he was thrown right out of the frying pan and right into a boiling kettle that could melt down at any moment.

Gary felt unsteady in his step. Watching the zoo animals interact. There wasn't that much happening. Not even one kid in a trash can.

No shrieks, barely anyone getting in trouble with prefects… what the fuck? Was everyone docile?

Gary was escorted all the way into Crabblesnitch's office. Gary feeling overwhelmingly energetic before he found himself sinking into an uncomfortable wooden chair, looking up to the skylight that they had crashed through last summer.

The office screamed pompous moron with too much money. Even the taxidermy was bought, he probably overpayed. No way Dr. Crabblesnitch would leave his office to shoot something.

Or shoot something at all, for that matter.

He could imagine Dr. Crabblesnitch with a musket on a wild stallion with a bunch of other rich morons as they released a bunch of hounds and foxes. He could see him either getting bucked off into weeds or buckshotting someone.

Loser.

Dr. Crabblesnitch slammed his hand on the desk, drawing Gary again from his thoughts.

"Mr. Smith, as I live and breathe, has it been a whole summer without you?"

"Indeed it has, sir. And I'm glad that you found it in your heart to accept me back. It's good to be back." Gary said rather smoothly, "more than good, it's great!"

Dr. Crabblesnitch was very animated like Gary, but more reserved. Finding himself pacing back and forth, his hands neatly folded behind his back. "It's been a whole summer since you turned my school into a battlefield. And, I recall, you tying me up here in my office while you ran amok."

The headmaster choose to look away from him for a moment, looking out the window like a real asshole.

Gary grit his teeth. Wanting to snap back but he knew he had to take whatever he said and turn it into a positive. Couldn't have bit the hand that fed him… yet.

"Not only did you turn this school upside down, but you also found it in your heart to unfairly and unjustifiably, get Mr. Hopkins expelled. Along with many others. What do you have to say, my boy?"

He chose his words carefully, tapping his feet in excitement, "I have changed over these past few months. I've become a better person, at least, the head doctor was very insightful about my condition while during my stay in Happy Volts. I was a troubled boy, I agree "

Dr. Crabblesnitch said nothing, observing.

"I've been taking my medication, I've been a good boy."

"Speaking of medication…" the headmaster sunk into his more comfortable seat, "what happened last summer was very… intelligent. Immaculate. But naughty! Here at Bullworth, we do more than just pit other students against each other. Why Gary, you have a brilliant mind!"

"Thank you." It definitely stroked Gary's ego.

"But you're a naughty boy. After talking with the head doctor at Happy Volts and receiving the considerable donations from your family I suppose I could let you return to this fine establishment."

"I would be grateful to return to such a fine school. Thank-"

"Under the condition that you continue treatment with medication and seek counseling when we see fit."

"We?" Gary tried to control himself, feeling his finger nails dig into his palms, trying his best not to toss the chair next to him right at Crabblesnitch.

"Yes, well Gary. I'd like you to meet the head boy. The symbol of a perfect student here at Bullworth." As he spoke, that old whore shooed in a familiar face. Still donning that ugly baby pink dress shirt. "Meet Mr. Kowalski."

Pete's face twisted into shock and fear, his eyes darting between the headmaster and the ghost, "Gary?"

Pete. PETE. PETEY?

Him a head boy. Head student. Fucking Pete. Of all the goddamn people in that trash fire they chose him? Perfect student?

Maybe Pete was psychic and could read Gary's thoughts because when Gary stood, the smaller boy backed away slowly.

He was more frightened when Gary reached out a hand, "Pleasure, Mr. Kowalski."

The boy looked nervously at the hand that the voice was attached to. He hesitantly shook the hand of the snake, "R… right, a pleasure."

"Mr. Smith, Mr. Kowalski will be showing you to your dorm, assisting you to you classes and helping you feel more at home here at Bullworth."

While Gary shook Petey's clammy hand, he squeezed in hatred and disgust at Crabblesnitch's words. His brown pools never leaving Pete's.

"But, sir, I know where the boys dorm is and where classes are located."

"Ah, yes, well you might have left the eyes of the sanitarium, but you haven't left our eyes. Remember to keep that nose clean or I shall personally clean it for you! Dismissed."

The two strolled out of the office without another word, avoiding Ms. Danvers wrath. Like some kind of bird that would scream when you got too close. Stepping down the stairs and onto the main floor and when they were out of ear shot, Gary wrapped his slimy arm around Pete's shoulder. Feeling the boy jump in surprise, Gary's breath tickled his ear. "I'm back in the flesh femme-boy! I'm back. Daddy's home!"


	4. Acta Non Verba

Petey and Gary both strolled to the far end of the boy's dorm. Passing morons on the way. The head boy had a key ring. Gary noted that. Petey flipped through keys before coming upon an older looking one. The smaller boy unlocked the unused room. The door creaked open and revealed a dusty, musty and decrepit room.

The desk was coated in a fine dust. The floors seemed uneven as if a giant stomped around on the poor wooden floors. But a wardrobe and desk sat, untouched. The bed itself seemed damp and he didn't have to touch it to know it.

But, this was his room.

Gary's.

His home.

Gary walked into the room with a smile, touching ear to ear. He twirled in the center of it. Sweeping a hand across the desk. Stirring up dust. He let out a amused chuckle, eyes then finding themselves locking on to Pete's surprised ones.

But, it least it didn't smell.

"Ahh, they don't make rooms like this back in the looney bin!"

Pete was a foot inside the threshold when Gary shoved him back, hearing the smaller boy smack his lips in frustration, "Gary! I'm supposed to help you!"

"Thanks, pal, but I think I can figure out how to unpack my own bag."

"But Gary, I'm supposed to supervise you."

The taller boy's lips curled into a Cheshire grin. He practically skipped in his step, drawing Pete in close, "Pete, Petey, Pete. You know that I know this school by heart. Why don't you let me roam free? And if I start 'causing mischief' you can always supervise me then."

Petey bit his lip, searching for the answers on the floorboards. "Gary… you know that you caused all those problems and-"

"That was the old me! I'm ingesting those behavioral drugs now! I'm a new man. I even had some shock treatment."

He lied.

He couldn't stop lying.

Pete mulled it over, his body tense before relaxing in defeat. "Fine… but if you do cause issues, I'll have to report you."

Gary waved him off before snorting. Petey always gave in easily. That would never change.

"But Gary-"

"But nothing femme-boy… unless," an evil smirk crept on his lips as he raised his shirt a small bit, revealing a bit of fuzz and a belly button. "you want to watch? The head boy of the school peeping. Now there's an offense if I've ever heard one."

Pete made a loud but shrill sound, flushed a bright red and slammed the door shut in front of him.

Gary licked his lips in delight.

Home. Home. Home. Home. Home.

His own room. Blank. Undecorated. First things first, he cracked open the window by his desk. Something he always wanted to do at Happy Volts, but couldn't.

He pulled the curtains to the side, lifting the blinds with the pulleys. Cool air filled the musty room. Light pouring in. A little air flow couldn't hurt.

He let out a breath of relief. He was very much home. And very much able to think here. He could hear his medication clinking around in their orange translucent jars from his bag.

Gary fished them out with no hesitation. Clamoring them up. Turning them all around in the sunlight.

"Should I take them?" he mulled over to himself out loud. Feeling himself drift off, he snapped back for a second, "or should I not take them?"

If he took them, he couldn't think clearly. But when he did, he blended in with the crowd.

Gary didn't have a moral compass like those morons. He thought logically. That's what got him so far. Got him back here.

"Maybe not today. I want to keep sharp." Gary muttered, "Sharp. Sharper than a knife. A knife to cut. Slice. Slice. Slice…"

He figured he would change before one of the many prefects would start on him.

Gary fumbled through his duffle bag. Changing into his uniform, he slung his shirt across the room along with his jeans. Combat boots being kicked under his desk. Wiping his face of sleep, he flailed his legs into slacks. Gary buttoned up his dress shirt, flattening it before sliding on his uniform vest. And surprisingly it still fit as well as he remembered, slightly loose. Tying his dress shoes. His watch being fastened around his wrist to keep his itinerary.

Time was all he could think about.

He figured this is when people would see him the most. He had to look his absolute best.

He opened the creaky old wardrobe. Finding a mirror was already built into the door on the inside. He almost surprised himself. He pulled his skin. Pores. Veins. Sunspots. A zit. Hair. Scar. Hollowed out cheeks and deep rings under his eyes.

He didn't look identical to last year… but not a lot had changed.

He still looked cunning. Ready to take his throne. Ready to thwart. Ready to pillage. Ready to rule.

Gary's throne was already usurped. Petey...

He pressed his forehead to the mirror.

How long had it been since he saw himself? Days? Weeks? Months?

His body didn't go through a metamorphosis. He wasn't a caterpillar. Maybe something in between.

A worm trying to be a butterfly.

But Gary was happy being a worm.

Suddenly, there was a commotion outside in the hallway.

Whoever it was, knocked on his door rather nicely and then the door crashed open. A pale ginger went in first and then Pete.

Petey pleading the entire time that it wouldn't be right to kick down Gary's door and make a scene.

Oh that ginger, that fucking ginger.

That boy.

That fucker.

That goddamn-

Jimmy gestured at Gary, his eyebrows furrowed into a furious expression, "Gary, why are you really here? You might be buying off Crabblesnitch and whoever else, but I don't believe you. You're a goddamn phony!"

"Jimmy!" Gary practically hopped in his step, bowing theatrically. Happy to play his role. "Jimmy well, I'm glad you graced me with your presence. A brute and a complete idiot, you haven't changed."

"You bastard."

"That's pretty harsh for someone who is as refined as myself. I'm a new man Jimmy. A changed man. Treat me as such, friend." Gary brought a finger to his chin before waving it around, "It's not polite to kick down my door. And it's not very polite to scream at an old, mentally ill friend. What would the prefects think? Or maybe Dr. Crabblesnitch?"

Jimmy grabbed Gary by his collar, practically ramming him into the side of his desk. Gary's fingers fastened around the edge of the oak desk, trying to hold himself steady so he wouldn't get slammed down into it. The less bruises the better. Jimmy was seething animosity, his face contorting in anger. Meanwhile, Gary was eating this up. His annoyance was his pleasure.

"Leave a few bruises on me! Jimmy I need some proof other than femme-boy's word."

Petey pulled Jimmy's shoulder, pleading but when he did, Jimmy glowered at Pete as if to say not to touch him. Pete put his hands up, "Fine, jeez. But… Jimmy, you can't do this!"

Jimmy grunted and growled, shoving Gary back in a huff before pointing right at him, "I'm watching you!"

The pale ginger practically raving mad by the time he disappeared out of the doorway.

"Likewise my friend."

Pete awkwardly waved at Gary before he also left. Almost as if he was catching up to Jimmy.

Typical.

Those two lovebird morons.

Although he heard a lot in the asylum about Jimmy from the dropouts and the expelled… the townies.

Heard that Jimmy was dating a girl named Zoe. And the woman seemed only a little familiar.

That everyone… seemed close.

It made Gary sick.

He unpacked a few personal belongings and whatever Happy Volts didn't trash. Just old pictures and knick-knacks. Most of the things he never really saw up until this year. Policy and everything.

Gary retrieved his pencil and notebook from his bag. Thinking about jimmy and what he said. What he did.

He thought to himself, within a few weeks he could bring this school to it's knees.

Gary took the pencil in hand, raising it up with delighted glee.

"I'm home and it's only a matter of time. It won't be long now." He peered out the opened window. As the clock struck nine and first period would soon begin, "If only all of Bullworth had one neck."

He snapped the pencil in half in a satisfying crunch.


	5. Divide Et Impera

Biology was the same old biology. Pinning down frogs and harvesting their organs. Cutting them out with a scalpel and scissors. Gary always thought that raising psychopaths early by cutting open dead things was definitely a good start.

Gary stretched, making his way to the library. He really wanted to read up on Rome rather than western civilization crap. History was important.

At least when you knew about it, you could repeat it.

All the famine, genocide and torture!

Maybe he could stop by the library. Swing in. Find a book that he wanted. Leave. Read. Study. And actually learn something.

On his way there, he spotted a bunch of weirdos wearing those astrology vests or astronomy or whatever they were. Forest green knit vests and poor posture. Nerds. Of course they would crowd around the library, it was their turf after all.

Gary proudly walked right into the weaklings wasp nest. Almost expecting a confrontation. Wanting one.

The group of three noticed him as if he had a flashing sign that said 'asshole' above his head. And he wasn't growing tired of the scared and bewildered looks he was getting. And from the nerds, he was loving it.

His eyebrows lowered and his smile Cheshired. Man, he was going to love this.

The first boy he noticed was Algernon. How could he not? The positively round boy with awful hygiene practically jumped straight up when Gary strolled right up to him and his posse. He adjusted his thick frame with fat fingers. "Gary? The Gary Smith? The sociopath?" Algie spoke to Bucky and Fatty before facing the Gary Smith head on.

The only thing he hated more than any other clique it was those morons.

"Well hello pee-stain, what's new?" Gary guffawed, "How are you and the other losers? Still virgins? Still playing those stupid games at the comic book store?"

Bucky and Fatty backed away from Algie as though he was sick with the plague. And neither of them wanted to get involved.

Gary was soaking in all their fear and disgust.

"Uh, I'll have you know that you can't speak to us like that!" Algie avoided his eye contact. As if Gary was some kind of predatory animal that took it as a challenge.

Okay, well, maybe he was.

"And why not? Afraid I might make you piss yourself if I talk too loud?" every step he took forward, Algie took two back, "did you miss me?"

"Not really, no." Algie said quite simply.

Fatty shouted in a bit of nerd rage, raising his hamfist. "Our sire will smite you with unbridled rage!"

Gary's head snapped in in his direction, sneering, "Sire? Who would that be?"

"Me."

That fucking voice.

It was him.

He twisted around seeing Jimmy, standing a few feet away with his arms crossed. Like some fucking valiant hero. Hero of the nerds.

"You can't be serious." Gary said flatly.

But it was true. Everyone seemed to smile at Jimmy. Welcome him. As if he had all the cliques wrapped around his finger. Like a shapeshifter that could fit any mold.

Again.

It was disgusting

Everyone was so supportive and happy.

Disgusting.

Jimmy and his droogs.

It made sense why Petey was head boy. Jimmy was the muscle. And he was the brains.

The face of operations and the fist.

Pathetic. Weak. Disgusting.

"You have me all wrong, friend." Gary swallowed, trying his best to keep his cool. Seeing that he would most likely cause a commotion and get him expelled after only a few hours on campus.

Wouldn't want that ginger to have a meltdown.

"Yeah? And how is that?" Jimmy practically spat.

"It was impersonal questions. Not insults. Lighten up! We're all, pals." Gary patted Algie's back so hard his glasses slid off the bridge of his nose and onto the ground. Gary wanted to crush them under his shoe, twisting his foot until it was unrepairable. But he took the highroad, stepping over them before waving them off. "Ta ta!"

Gary stormed his way into the library, practically disturbing the silence almost immediately with him bursting through the old wooden doors. His friendly, 'wolf in sheep's clothing' façade melting into his regular scowl. Getting now annoyed with those students wandering around the library, stopping and staring.

He snapped at the passerby's.

"What are you looking at?"

Mrs. Carvin shushed him with one of those thin wrinkled fingers. Shuffling back to a pile of library books that had been returned to be put back into it's respective place.

Gary grunted before shoving his hands in his pockets. After his scolding from the librarian and the valiant hero, Jimmy he was set back to reality.

A few minutes of walking and searching, he found himself drawn to the history section almost immediately.

Touching each and every spine. Looking for just the right one. Caesar and the Gallic War. He opened it, immediately being assaulted by the smell of old, decaying pages. He skimmed it. It was the detailed war plans and estimated dates.

Maybe he could use it. Learn and abuse his findings.

He found an open desk to sit and read. Finding the perfect book at the perfect time.

His eyes finding themselves to the mess of papers beside him. Mostly homework and oh, character sheets? And a rather large textbook. Gary peeked all around, trying to make sure there were no prying eyes. He slid the textbook over to him.

Grottos and Gremlins handbook? Oh, and the respective character sheets?

Earnest Jones?

Nothing could get the boy's heart throbbing like mischief.

Gary quickly pilfered the book and stuffed it inside his own book bag. Devising a little plan of his own.

No one is so brave that he is not disturbed by something so unexpected.


	6. In Callidus Concubina

Even at ten in the evening, the dorm still rumbled and bustled. Gary groaned, pulling his pillow over his ears. At least the orderlies would order a lights out. And then, when he fell asleep finally, Gary dreamed that he was perched in a throne of gold. The crisp summer air tickling his nose. He could hear the rumble of thousands of people. His school attire was replaced by a tunic of silk and gold lining. His hair donned a wreath of grape vine.

Gary stood.

All the spectators in the Coliseum had their eyes on him. And, if by instinct and by swift motion, he slid his sword from the sheath by his side. He rose it far into the air for all to see.

The crowd only got louder and louder as the sounds of mechanical cranking and gears turned. And from across the coliseum, a man exited the confines of the wroth iron gate. Gary gasped in amazement as an armor clad Jimmy approached the center. The ruler of his dream reached forward to a platter of grapes popping them into his mouth. A satisfied smile graced his lips. Occasionally he would squish the fruit between his fingers.

A woman that sat beside him, placed her hands on his arm, leaning into him. That made Gary's stomach drop and he jerked it away in annoyance. The woman with the auburn hair smacked her lips, groaning. Gary supposed it was just a whore or something. That wasn't the relevant part of the dream.

The part that was relevant was the lion that was then released from it's cage. It reminded him of that time that he put Jimmy into the Hole. Gary was gleeful, nearly bouncing in excitement as the lion reared onto its hind legs and jumped forward at Jimmy. And…

And…

And…

"Goddamn it, I was so close!" Gary mumbled, "I wanted to watch him get torn apart!"

He rose up, sitting up in his bed. His eyes adjusted and noticed the time was early as hell.

Six in the morning.

Well shit.

Once Gary woke up, he couldn't go back to bed. He wouldn't waste time just loitering around.

He dressed in his school uniform, figuring he'd stop at Yum Yum Market before class begun. Gary decided it would be a good time to read his book too.

He took the long caring process of getting ready in his school uniform. And with that he was out the door. A long walk ahead of him. The gates of Bullworth still closed so Gary decided to be a little adventurous. Trying to vault the wall and semi-succeeding he landed on his feet like a cat on the other side.

He started his long journey and knew New Coventry would be a bit of a walk but he had time to kill.

And when he crossed that bridge, he saw more looks. But instead of shock, he saw hate.

And all the townsfolk kept glaring at him. Sneering. He was sick of it.

Small towns were shit.

He slipped inside the market. Gary observing the cashier as he flipped through a girlie magazine. It was a Hustler magazine. The heavy stuff, or so he heard. Every so often, turning the filth one hundred and eighty degrees to let a few other pages flip down. He turned back to the aisles, filling his pockets with sweets. He grabbed himself a cola off the shelve. Who didn't mind a lukewarm cola?

He brought it to the cashier, flipping through his small wad of money. He could see eyes peek above the magazine. Fat fingers clicked a few keys and with a ring of the register and some odd change, he was outside.

He was really too good at what he did.

He sat on a bench, appreciating the crisp morning. Birds chirping. The sun just starting to rise.

Gary felt almost at peace.

Almost.

The boy propped open the small canvas book, creaking as it did. Caesar's Gallic War, it read on the cover. Worn and old looking. The smell of the library was strong. Like almonds. It must have sat there for years, waiting for him.

Just him.

Only him.

Gary didn't know why, but he found himself taking notes. Caesar's time in war and his method of utilizing and strategizing battle plans in his notebook. Taking in as much information as he could.

He sipped his soda, enjoying the way the carbonation would tickle his tongue.

He could think so much straighter.

So much clearer.

But his seemingly endless train of thoughts was interrupted when he saw matte leather step into view. He looked up, seeing that the pants were connected to something. Or someone.

A familiar woman.

A familiar face.

It made him uncomfortable how close she was. Her stray auburn hairs flicked away with red claws. The way her nails matched her lipstick and her scarf. It wasn't by accident. He knew.

Egotistical bitch.

She placed her hands on her hips, swinging them to the side as she did so. Noticing her perfume that was so pungent. It ruined his autumn air. It was making Gary's lip rise in disgust.

"Is it true?"

Lola Lombardi.

The town bicycle. Everyone had ridden her at least once. She gave anyone the time of day. Hell, she would have even gave Petey the time of day if he wasn't such a fag.

Johnny Vincent's soulmate apparently.

That fucking idiot.

"Is what true?"

"That they shocked the bad boy out of you?"

Gary was nearly speechless. Who would be that direct? Anyone here really. But why her? Maybe she was stupid. He got sick of her last year when she was climbing all over Jimmy and literally everyone else. After all, while Jimmy was locking lips with her, he was toiling away.

And her constantly going on and on, saying she really was Helen of Troy.

Yuck. Greek mythos.

"Do you know how really dumb you sound, friend?" he scooted forward on the bench, crooning his head upward as he did so.

He wasn't intimidated.

Instead of getting mad or upset like he thought she would, she instead spoke coolly, "Easy tiger, I was just askin' a little question…" with a quick motion, or magic trick, she pulled a cigarette from behind her ear and popped it between her lips, "Wouldn't want smoke to start comin' out of your ears."

Okay, that made Gary speechless. And unfortunately, it didn't happen often. When Lola noticed that she swung her hip to the other side. Leather gleaming in the sun.

She leaned down, and Gary hesitated, looking at her from under his eyebrows. He didn't want to seem small. Her cigarette pointing at him like the barrel of a gun. "Got a light?"

"I don't smoke."

"Shame. Well," she placed the lipstick painted end behind her ear again, it disappeared from view as her hair curtained over it.

Gary was beyond disgusted.

"You took over this school, you ruled this school, and like that," putting the back of her hand to her forehead, she dramatically cooed, "the bigger they are, the harder they fall. Right through a skylight, I heard."

Gary could have tossed his book aside, stood up and spat in her face. Told her how much of a worthless cunt she was. How much of a goddamn slut.

"Look, let's be frank, pal. I'm not entertained by a girl that's fucked Algernon. Pee-pants himself."

Lola's eyebrows lowered at the comment, eyes narrowing down at the boy in front of her. She was slightly annoyed, but she probably bit her tongue too.

"Baby, no need to be rude to me. You're this big sociopath. A ruler of some kind. And I'm just trying to open you up a little." She bent down, grabbing the sides of his chin, forcefully moving his chin to the right. Gary's neck popping as she did so. "And from this angle, you're very hot. Love the scar."

Gary could feel his stomach drop and he felt himself go red with rage. He slapped her hand of off him and grit his teeth, "You think I want to talk to you? Find someone else to bother!"

Lola's pointed shoe kicked out into Gary's shin before nuzzling their way between his legs. "Well honey, whenever you wanna talk to me, you know where I am. Don't forget about me."

She snatched something off of his lap before twirling on her heel and sauntering off.

When she was walking away, and no longer in eye sight, he rubbed his face of any embarrassment left. As his hands parted from his eyes, he saw that his lap was empty. He searched each side of him before he realized that bitch stole it off of him.

His goddamn book!


	7. Pugna

Gary continued his way down bustling halls. Kids talking in groups, stragglers and people sorting through book bags.

Nothing had really changed.

Soaking in as many details about his surroundings as possible. He purposely strolled his way through a group of bullies, making sure to bump into a few of them on his way into class. It wasn't an accident of course.

Their relaxed smiles and jabs at each other turned to glares on Gary. As if their fists weren't enough, they're glares were worse.

One of them called out, "There goes the crazy kid!"

Crazy. Hm, maybe not so much. Gary didn't see it.

But maybe it was a warning that he should at least try to take his meds.

Those apes.

His typewriter eyes stopping at Trent fiddling with his lock. Cursing to himself as he struggled. Idiot. It clicked open and he rustled through his messy locker. The blonde. The way he would coo, 'shirts and skins'. Disgusting.

He was the most tolerable but also the most annoying.

Trent's eyes met Gary's for a moment before closing his locker and the bullies that Gary 'accidently' bumped into drew him from his thoughts, crowding around him. Trent's features scrunched up before socking Gary in his shoulder. "Welcome back, weirdo."

With that the horde of morons wandered off. And they went on their merry way. Loud and obnoxiously.

And as if he blacked out. Gary found himself at Trent's locker. Fingers making quick work of the locker combination. He didn't make much of an effort to hide the combo. Flicking through numbers until it made a satisfying click.

And if it were like he was sent on a divine path, he carried out his plan. He needed to do this.

Those meatheads.

His throne was awaiting him.

He might have been the very bottom of the food chain.

But he was going to have everyone above him trying to kill each other.

He shoved the grottos and gremlins manual into in the cramped locker. Taking a few tries before it finally found itself suspended enough that it would close. His lips curling into a delightfully devilish smile. With one good push he slammed it shut and something slipped out of the manual and onto the hallway floor.

It landed on the floor as Gary knelt down to picked it up he hesitated.

"Hustler… huh."

What he could tell, it was a woman, but he couldn't really tell, the shot was way too close and fixated. She had robust hips wearing some kind of sequined bottom. Red. It matched the red claws that sat on her hips

It was a weird coincidence.

Earnest was perverse, though.

It made sense he would carry such filth.

Gary swiped it up and placed it back into his bag. He squeezed the lock shut.

He took a quick glance around before walking away.

He got away with it unscathed.

Maybe it was going to be very easy.

The warning bell rang that class was starting and Gary quickened his pace away from the scene of the crime.

English.

What a drool subject.

He sat near the window, peering out. Wishing he was out there. Enjoying the crisp air. Imagining the school yard engulfed in flames. People trying to run away from the chaos but finding nowhere safe.

He imagined himself like an orchestrator of such. Like Satan in the last circle of hell. He would eternally punish everyone.

They deserved it.

Gary's thoughts found themselves on Lola. He thought about her. And how brash and cunning she was.

The bitch.

His thoughts were cut short as a mysterious note found itself on his desk. He opened it out of curiously but finding nothing but irritation.

A poor stick figure getting electrocuted. 'you' and 'thunder' was written cruelly.

Thunder was the fucking sound.

Goddamn, they were stupid.

He tore it up.

Gary craned his head behind him and saw those pimple faced morons, pounding their fist into their hands. Laughing loudly until Mr. Galloway said, in that nasally tone, not drunk at all, "Hey, hey, hey! Do your damn- I mean, do your worksheets quietly amongst yourselves."

He turned back to his semi-completed worksheet. Foot and leg bouncing.

Gary glanced at the watch, as if the minute and hour hand kept going slower and slower and slower.

As if he was in some void.

And with a few minutes of work, he finished his worksheet.

Gary thought to himself.

If you must break the law, do it to seize power: in all other cases observe it.

The bell sounded. He left his sheet at his desk and snatched up his bag, making sure to make haste. Wanting to watch everything unfold.

He rounded the corner where Trent's locker was. Cornelius howled to Jimmy about the character sheets and manual. Practically hollering out that someone stole them from the library from Earnest. That it was probably an assault from the jocks. As revenge for something that happened last year.

Probably because Earnest lost that poor excuse of class presidency.

He stood. Listening. Head peeking around the corner.

"Did someone say Grottos and Gremlins?" Gary said, making sure his appearance was always a dramatic one, rounding the corner.

"Y-yes, how would you know, Gary? How are you privy to such information?" Cornelius said timidly.

"All information comes at a price," he waggled his finger, "Lucky you, I'm having a sale on such information."

"Spit it out, Gary!" Jimmy growled.

"Free of charge for you, friend. Trent, that blonde idiot swiped it up while I too was at the library. He said something about making the nerds cry about that dumb game."

He stood like an innocent angel from hell. A halo practically shining above him.

"Trent? A bully? I suppose I can see that. From my calculations, he can be somewhat rude and-"

"Listen, friends. What do I get out of lying to you?" Gary interrupted before he would lose control.

Jimmy shot back, "How are we supposed to trust you?"

"You don't have to. Ask him yourself."

Speak of the devil, Trent and his group of bullies came out of English. Crowding around the lockers. Cracking their knuckles and hooting like a bunch of cavemen.

Cornelius took it upon himself to march right up to Trent, tapping his arm, "Excuse me?"

"What?" Trent said dazed before narrowing on the smaller boy. Practically hulking over him.

"Yes, do you perhaps have my friend Earnest's Grotto and Gremlins manual and the sheets for our game? We're playing tonight and I- oop!"

The blonde yanked at his vest and practically picked the nerd off his feet. Jimmy instantly reacted by trying to play dove and olive branch.

Gary jittered in absolute giddy. Holding his arms, feeling them erupt in goosebumps under the dress shirt. "If it's true, Trent, open your locker."

The bullies attention was now on Gary. Gary knew what was going to happen next. And he was going to explode in joy.

"Do it, Trent." The pale ginger demanded.

Trent let out a sigh, knowing that what Jimmy said, goes. All on account of Russell liking him and everything.

The social ladder started to falter.

Trent made quick work of the lock and opened his locker door. The manual crashed onto the floor. A smaller Cornelius pointed to the spine of a familiar book, crying out in shock.

"Liar! Purveyor!"

Trent put his hands up, partially because Jimmy started in closer to him, "What the hell are you talking about?! That's not mine!"

The small nerd must have found his balls that day because he shoved Trent. And like the wolves would have, they did. The Bullies descended upon Cornelius. And Jimmy was in the middle.

A crowd gathered and the shouts of many students filled his ears as her rode the mania.

"Hey! HEY!"

"Watch out!"

"Someone do something!"

All the commotion and the prefects came. Their lovely attitudes shining through. Tackling the pimpleheads. Gary reached out and drug the boy by his ugly vomit green vest.

He yanked Cornelius far enough away from the commotion. Placing his arm around his shoulder.

He could hear Petey and then Jimmy.

Gary practically shoved the kid to get him to walk faster.

"Fisticuffing someone half your size isn't wise." Gary brushed him off, "Here, lemme walk you to the library pipsqueak. I'll make sure we get that book and those sheets to your friends."

"Deepest thanks, Gary!"

And when they made it to the library, the nerds praised him for once.

Sickening.


	8. Non Ducor, Duco

Things were getting slightly more tense. Russell heard about what happened with Trent. Having no real foresight, and seeing that Russell was a complete moron, the bullies all thought they were set up by the nerds.

And the nerds thought they were just being harassed by the bullies.

Which would logically make sense.

Meanwhile, Jimmy and Pete were acting as the dove and olive branch. They were all morons. Each clique was shifty.

All snakes. All backstabbers. All bad news.

Gary was planted on that green couch, listening to the rain pitter pattering on the roof. His leg bouncing. Skin crawling. Not much to do. Maybe stare at the tv. Maybe think.

Not knowing exactly how he ended up here.

But he didn't really notice when or how Jimmy and Petey ended up sitting on that couch beside him.

Like a floating dream. Walking dream. His memory seemed fuzzy. Gary chewed on the end of the pencil eraser, fiddling with it.

Petey flipped through channels on the remote. Tension already high, but the locker incident making it worse. You could cut through it.

Jimmy let out a loud but exhausted sound.

"Gary, I heard what you did. It was nice of you. To you know, help." Petey said awkwardly.

Gary stopped flipping around the pencil in his fingers. Eyes slowly finding themselves to Pete. He was silent. Characteristically silent.

Jimmy didn't pick up on this but Petey did.

"Yeah, but Gary doesn't do nice." Jimmy said almost as if he wasn't even there, "I'm watching you, man."

"As I said, likewise."

"Gary, you don't do nice shit. You do shit for your benefit."

Jimmy was right. Gary didn't know much about himself. But he knew all he had to know. He didn't do nice. He provided for himself. His predatory look went right through Jimmy. Like daggers.

More silence. It made small Petey squirm. Being in the middle of two powerful personalities. Figuratively and literally.

"What was it like?" Petey blurted.

"Happy Volts?" Gary said assumingly.

"…yeah."

"Easy. You see that psychiatrist. You sit down confess your secrets and your cured. A multimillion dollar business thriving until the patients, you know, kill themselves."

"What if you're not cured?"

The shocks. He thought back at the shrink at Happy Volts before putting pressure onto the pencil. He could feel his chest rise and fall faster now. The more he thought about it, the more pressure he'd put on the pencil before snapping the pencil between his fingers.

The crack made Petey jump. Spooking him.

"The more you confess, the faster they'll let you leave. And if you don't confess enough they'll just keep you. And then you'd be there forever. A lifer."

Petey turned to Jimmy. Maybe to avoid Gary all together. The animosity seething from Gary was uncomfortable. Even he himself could feel it.

"Sounds like you're not fixed then." The pale ginger spoke simply.

Gary rose to his feet. Like coals had replaced the plush fabric. A look of uncontrolled anger shot right at Jimmy. Jimmy rose to the challenge, literally.

"What's that supposed to mean, friend?"

"Touchy, aren't we?"

Petey stood, putting his hands up. "Hey, hey, hey!" Trying to get the two relaxed, he blew a little. Finding himself with two pairs of glares on him, he shrunk up, "You guys can't keep fighting like this!"

"That brings up a good point, Pete. Why are you hanging out with us?" Jimmy said finally, Pete flabbergasted by the words so forcefully shoved in his mouth.

"I didn't say-"

"What you did last year. To me. To all of us. Why? Were you just paranoid? I didn't do anything to you!"

Gary practically squeezed Petey out of the gap between the two, Gary's digit stabbing into Jimmy's chest.

"Because I know you Jimmy. You would have backstabbed me if you had the chance!"

"What the fuck, Gary?! How many times do I have to tell you that I wouldn't have?"

"You're a liar, Jimmy!"

"And you're a phony! You planted that book, didn't you!"

Petey once again tried to squeeze his way in between the two, forcing them both back. Finding that the halls of the dorm were quiet, the two of them causing another scene. And everyone's eyes were on them.

"That's enough!" Petey practically shouted, "If you continue I'll report you both!"

The commotion sounded from the back of the dorm, guys yelling and a woman telling them to 'piss off'. A familiar woman came into view and placed her hands on her hips.

"Report? Who? Jimmy? Or this dumbass?"

Gary crossed his arms, watching as Jimmy's favorite hole came sauntering in. She practically shoved Gary aside, placing her hands on Jimmy's shoulders. She had a wild sense of fashion. Like she got dressed in the dark. Kinda ugly to be honest. He recognized her. That was her.

That was Zoe.

The way she looked at Gary. Like she would have done something. She internally debated on it, Gary could see it.

"I could hear you guys all the way outside. Even over the storm out there! Petey, you need to have a better handle on these two."

"I was trying!" Petey protested.

Jimmy tried to open his mouth but a red painted nail placed itself over his mouth. "Quit acting stupid. Let's do something already. I'm bored."

His lips curled mischievously and she slapped him across the face. Maybe playfully. Maybe not.

But he still grabbed her waist and pulled her in close. Their lips connecting. Their bodies melding, almost becoming one joint unit. Gary suspected that they fuck. The sweaty bodies and the sounds people make when nobody was looking behind closed doors. Spank me harder and all that. A hormone melting pot.

Gary found no use for all that.

"Is that all you think about? Not that. Jeez, come on." Zoe spoke, tugging Jimmy's hypothetical leash. With that, like an obeying dog, lapping and sitting by her leg, he walked.

"Look, I gotta go. See ya." Jimmy's unhappy mood was instantly gone.

"Bye Jimmy." Petey waved the two off.

Petey let out a weary sigh, sinking back into the couch.

It didn't help that both Petey and Gary were all alone now. Gary sat uncomfortably close to Petey. The way that he made the air so tense. It helped him feel more in control.

Because he was.

He was in control of Petey.

"Well, were alone." Gary purred. "All alone. So, so alone."

But they really weren't alone. The hallway was bustling with boys. Boys that had nothing to do outside. Like Gary and Petey.

Gary's hand somehow found itself on Petey's knee and the boy let out a squeak. His skin erupting with goosebumps under his palm.

"What do you want to do about it?" Gary said with his eyebrows wiggling the entire time. His lips pressing against the shell of Petey's ear. "All alone. So much time to ourselves. We could spend the time in your room, maybe mine."

Petey started to fidget, uncomfortable now.

"…what do you mean?"

Leting out a delighted giggle, Gary sneered. "Relax femme-boy."

Petey's frown deepened.

"Do you… really feel fixed?"

It was like a punch in the gut as he stood. Wanting to spit out poison as he did so.

"Shut up already." Gary found himself up, placing a hand on the green couch, "I gotta take my meds. Take a cold shower, would you? You're really pathetic."

Petey placed his hands between his legs. Seemingly, he had gotten too excited and let out a groan of embarrassment.

Gary decided that it would probably be in his best interest to take some of his meds. He was starting to stick out. And he was paranoid that he'd have to piss in a cup at some point.

He couldn't leave yet.

He would swallow the capsules dryly and try his best to blend in.

Tomorrow.


	9. Lacus Luxuriae

He was seated on the floorboards by his bed. Going through each and every note from under his door. Like a snake coiled up under a rock. Calculating. Waiting for something or someone to reveal himself.

Something new he was receiving was notes.

Tons and tons of notes.

Things that people didn't have the courage to say to his face but had the courage to write in notes.

Cowards.

Was Gary always like this? He remembered that people disliked him, sure. He had no friends.

Never really did.

By his choice of course.

But people didn't treat him this bad. He didn't remember the scorned looks. Didn't remember the hateful notes he'd find under his dorm door.

Telling him that he shouldn't of come back.

Telling him he should just go away.

It was agonizing but it was just as exhilarating.

He was feared.

He didn't mind it either.

He found himself walking late that night, sinking into the collar of his jacket. Spotting preppies roaming about. Townies hiding in alleyways, doing God knows what.

Eyes always moving.

Always searching.

Gary continued on, soaking in the night air and the quietness. Something about it made him tired. Weary even.

The cold night sobered him.

Very few people hung around at night. It wasn't because of the crime. Maybe the teenager's hijinks?

Probably not.

He stopped in his step. Squinting before noticing a glowing cherry ahead him. The warm color reflecting off of leather. As if she had a warm aura around her.

He found himself drawn, like a moth spotting the end of her cigarette.

In the shadows of that underpass, he could see Lola.

She leaned against the stone wall, her foot propped behind her. 'Jimmy wuz here' poorly graffitied across the cobblestone.

The night seemed somber.

Her head slowly turned to Gary, he could feel himself glower at her. Without a word from Lola, he stuck his hand out at her. "My book, you thief."

"You finally decided to talk to me, huh?" she plopped the cigarette out from between her lips, blowing a billow of smoke before rubbing the stub out on the grout of the bricks. "I knew you'd be back, they always come back."

"You took my book. It's the only reason."

She chuckled a bit to herself, eyes never leaving his. Challenging him almost with that unending eye contact.

Like a predatory animal.

"Now. Hand it over, friend." Gary demanded.

Lola perched herself off the wall, her hand running through her hair as she stopped just short of Gary. She was tall. It didn't help she traded those tennis shoes for heels. When he was sitting on the bench that day, Gary felt small. But her towering over him made him feel even smaller.

Lola crossed her arms and bent a little forward. He could smell her. Her perfume smelled like cherries and the hint of cigarette smoke clung to her and wafted into his nose. "Yes, baby boy? Use your grown up words."

Why was everyone calling him a boy?

"I'm not a baby and I'm not a boy."

She made a noise of annoyance at him, lifting his chin, eyes lighting up when she saw him look away from her.

"Maybe sixteen, or seventeen, but you're still a pipsqueak." Gary's stomach fell even farther, feeling her thumb rub his chin. "You're still a baby boy. So young. So carefree."

"I'm not. Get your hands of me." His eyes flicking back to her. His arms and legs felt like stone as they refused to move.

If he was a spitting cobra, she was definitely a kingsnake. She bit into him, trying to rip him apart. Trying to devour him. And he was just letting her. She was already maiming him. And with a smile.

Him. Gary.

"Don't worry baby, I'll take really good care of you." She purred. Red stained claws pulling away from his face and dragging their way up his stomach and chest. "I'll make you feel really good."

He felt sick to his stomach.

"Get your hands off me, you stupid bitch."

She removed her hands from him, withdrawing them as fast as they found themselves there.

"You think you're a real tough guy, huh?"

Gary didn't think of himself as a brute.

He could feel her warmth now. Too close.

"When I look at you Gary, you know what I see? A little boy. A little boy doing a bunch of bad things hoping someone will notice."

Gary felt his skin crawl. The flame in his chest expand and grow hotter and hotter. He felt his blood boil.

"Get real! Keep that book. I don't care!" Gary turned on the heel of his combat boots when arms wrapped around him. Feeling her chest press against his back. Like a snake trying to suffocate his prey. He elbowed her side, shoving her away.

A gasp left her lips.

"Ow!"

"Learn to keep your hands to yourself, hag!"

She stomped up to him, pulling his book out of her purse. Waving it in his face. He tried to grab it but she snatched it away. Like a grownup playing keep-away with a child.

"You're nothing but a little kid!" she practically bellowed. "Men are so stupid and selfish. Always thinking of themselves!"

She was losing her cool and it only made Gary angry. It didn't make him feel that rush. Like with Jimmy. Just annoyance.

"What do you want from me?!" he yelled.

She jumped forward, grabbing him by the face. Reminding him of those orderlies back at Happy Volts. Her face scrunching up and her nails dug into his cheeks.

"You want this goddamn book? Huh? Then do something. Do what I want you to do!"

The kettle boiled over and Gary let out whatever he had been holding back.

All this time here at Bullworth. The mental asylum. Everything came pouring out in all it's carnal beauty.

He shoved the slut against the brick wall. He could hear the wind get knocked from her lungs. And like that, he was all over her lips. His hands grabbing and tugging at the sleek fabric that hugged her hips. His teeth grazing hers, clinking against each other. Tongue pushing it's way inside of her mouth, stinging as it did so. Feeling the zip of nicotine.

He was tired of her shit. Jimmy's shit. Pete's shit. Everyone.

He just let himself go.

Gary just...

His eyes snapped open.

Then all of a sudden like alarms going off in his head, he felt a surge of pain from his bottom lip. Like it was going to tear apart from his jaw.

That's when he noticed that Lola's teeth had sunk all the way down, tickling his nerves.

With a howl he pushed himself away, holding his mouth. Checking his fingers for blood. His bottom lip was hot to the touch.

He held his lip while she held the back of her head.

"You… you brute!" she fished her compact out of her pocket. She practically was absorbed in her reflection. Checking her makeup. And with a whine, she stomped her heel. "You smeared my lipstick! Goddamn it!"

He jabbed a finger into her chest. "My. Book. Now."

With a click from the compact, she was already turning away from him. Storming away into New Coventry.

"Feisty tiger. Too bad you're a terrible kisser."

"My book!"

"Maybe instead of studying those Roman rulers, study some female anatomy!" she turned to rub her breasts, as if to tease him before giving him an obscene gesture. A certain finger. "I have a date with Gord tonight. See you Gary Smith."

Gary watched and watched. Watching the woman who had made him crack walk into the night.

Like a ghost.

When he could no longer see her, his stomach started to ache. Like someone had started to stab at his guts. His tongue swelled and his mouth filled with saliva.

He felt sick to his stomach.

It was aching. Vomit tickling his throat. He ducked into an alleyway.

He had somehow lost control of his breathing. Huffing, puffing. And then it came gushing out of him. Like shaking a soda and pulling the tab.

Bits and pieces of whatever laid in his stomach came crashing onto concrete. His nose leaking. Eyes welling up with tears.

Gary took one last look at it.

He stumbled away from the mess. Wiping his mouth and smearing the gunk onto the wall.

That fucking bitch.


	10. Opulentia

Another uneventful day. His throat still stinging from the events of last night. Her perfume still lingering on him. Jimmy had even asked if he had started up smoking. He could still feel her warmth wrapped around him.

It made Gary uneasy.

He tried to make himself not care. He wouldn't allow it.

Lola was just another stepping stone he would have to use in order to reach his goals. He couldn't let himself get wrapped up in someone like her.

It would be… sloppy.

Gary wasn't sloppy.

He wasn't sloppy. He wasn't sloppy. He…

Gary had to admit, it was a slow climb upwards. At least the nerds were making things interesting. The tensions between the nerds and the bullies were rising and Gary could only look upon the dismay with a smile.

Only thing was that those nerds kept calling him, 'valiant knight'.

He cringed at the thought.

Gary was ripped from his thoughts seeing something waved in front of his face. He blinked a few times before grabbing the appendage. Hearing a squeak, he looked down to a distraught Pete. "Sorry!"

"Petey, please, don't wave your hand in the face of a crazy person." He spat.

With that warning, Pete tried to pull his arm away from Gary before panicking. "I-I'm sorry Gary! Please, let go!"

With the magic word, he let go. Petey's frantic yanking made him fall into Jimmy's shoulder but Jimmy was nice and helped him right himself by shoving him towards Gary.

Pete finally found his footing before the two would toss him back and forth like those jocks and their love of balls.

"What are you losers doing later, anyways?" Gary said plainly. Petey and Jimmy were like flies on a decomposing body.

You couldn't find one without the other.

"Petey, Zoe and I are gonna see that new movie at the cinema. Janitor Massacre. We're gonna sneak in."

"We're sneaking in?" Petey practically shrieked and Jimmy nudged him, politely hinting to shut the fuck up.

Gary slid his jittery hands in his pockets, smirking to himself. "Thanks for inviting me, but I'm busy tonight."

"You weren't invited." Jimmy sneered.

"While you three are watching some dumb movie, I'm going to be-"

Gary thought for a moment, he didn't want to say plotting but then what came next spilled out of his mouth like an oil spill.

"-seeing a girl."

Gary stopped mid-step when he said this. Freezing in shock and fear of what came crashing out of his mouth.

The two boys kept walking until that word vomit reached them. And they came up to him, swarming him. He held his hands out. Partially to keep them from getting too close and the other half to hide his humiliation.

"Girl?!"

"Like a girlfriend? You? Are you sure you didn't use some kind of torture method?"

Gary groaned, rubbing his temples, letting out a exasperated sigh. "Not a girlfriend. Just a girl."

"Rats would be more interested in you." The redhead jabbed.

Gary clamped his mouth shut. Watching the two eagerly await whatever details he had.

Pathetic.

"Yeah well, you're both faggots."

Leaving the two practically begging for more information, he walked out of those iron gates.

He wanted to see her again. For his book. She took it. He had been too careless. Too trusting.

He stood where the underpass was. Checking his watch. It was dusk. No sign of her. But something seemed off. He continued into New Coventry, the overpass just out of view. And then, he heard a mewl. Thinking it to be a stray cat, he stopped and listened to his surroundings.

A moan. Then a groan. Then a weak, 'help'.

He poked his head into a dark alleyway, following the noise. Ducking inside. After a moment or two of squinting, he saw it.

A man on his side and a worn out pipe.

Wrong side of the tracks.

Gary knelt down, flipping the ruined Aquaberry sweater and bloody mess onto his back. From what he could tell, it looked like Gord. His natural good looks beyond recognition. Similar to how bruised the preppies would get after an intense round of boxing. But this was different.

Gary was definitely blessed by someone or something. He had won the bloodied lottery.

Gord's whole face was swollen. Ugly red and the beginnings of purple crept across his exaggerated features. It looked nasty.

Gary started slapping his face, trying to draw him out of his unconscious state. Perhaps too hard. Gary didn't mind. He was already fucked, why not pulverize him more?

And just like that, he was back. "Derby?" Gord lifted his head before smiling and lowering it again, "Oh, it's just a ghost."

"Keep it up and you'll turn into one, Gord."

When Gord heard this his body found a second wind. Enough energy to lift himself to try to sit. Gary held him as he faltered. He didn't want him to dash his head and die. Gary wouldn't get a reward if he died.

"Smith?"

"Look do you want my help or not?"

"It looks as though I might not have a choice in the matter." When he opened his mouth he could see old blood caked around his teeth and outlining every crevasse of his smile.

"Shut up. And quit trying to talk."

Gary helped the boy to his feet. Feeling Gord's legs instantly buckle from his weight. Gary slugged his arm over his shoulder and held his hip to his. The awkward angle made it hard to walk.

Gord hissed and groaned with every agonizing step.

"For a boxer you sure aren't good at dodging a lead pipe, huh?"

"No, afraid not. Vincent and his greaseball goons… They had the element of surprise. I was waiting for my tease and then... They pulverized me with that pipe. When they were through with that-"

"Kicked your ass?" Gary finished with a snort, "They sure did a number on you pal."

"Why of all the people in the world are you helping me?"

"You rather I let you of die in the gutter?"

"You probably would have. You don't have much of a heart."

Gord, punch drunk, his daily dose of iron pipe reached its absolute max, could still sense the underlying hostility emanating from Gary. He wasn't helping Gord from the kindness of his heart.

It was to rile up those greaseballs.

And for praise.

Gord looked at him through his good eye. Almost looking right into Gary's soul. Bloodshot and ugly.

"Lola is bad news."

Gary felt a knot form in his throat that was hard to swallow. Not looking away or showing any sense of wavering, he stared back. Fingers digging into his ribcage making Gord holler in pain.

"I wouldn't know. I'm not interested in some whore. Plus, haven't you learned your lesson yet?"

"I haven't, nor will I ever. She's so captivating and… slummy but I want to 'slum it' with her. She's so realistic. So, beautiful and real."

"So beautiful you would be beaten and left in a gutter to die?"

Gord romanced, rather obnoxiously. Trailing off. "Lola is a tease. She makes me lust for her in ways I never thought a young gentleman like myself could."

"Oh?"

"She might be some slum… well, poor person. But she's a goddess. Like Aphrodite. She's perfect."

Aphrodite was nothing compared to the Roman goddess Venus. If Lola was a goddess as Gord perceived she wouldn't be some Greek bitch. She'd be paying with blood.

As she might have with Gord.

"Goddess?"

"She's perfection. Her curves. Her taste. The way she… incites copulation-"

Gary groaned in disgust. Ready to drop the loser on the sidewalk. Maybe kick him a few times. Spit on him. And leave him where he laid.

"But, you're quite handsome. Where ever did you get that sweater?"

Even a stupid moron, bloodied to a pulp wouldn't dare hit on Gary.

"Derby will definitely hear about this. What you did for me Gary was truly out of the kindness of your heart."

He felt crusty, swollen lips brush against his cheek. Then Gary felt hot again. Ready to finish Gord off. He was annoyed.

"Don't mention it." He said through his teeth, hissing.

Gord's neck rolled before leaning into his shoulder. Feeling his breaths against his dress shirt. "You smell so familiar. So good. Fruity."

Within a few blocks, he could see those preppies. Hanging around the gym. More like the rich boxers haven to show off. He was in a close enough distance that the two were spotted. From what Gary could see, Bif and Tad's face contorted to shock and horror before rushing to the bruised and worthless Gord. They practically tore him off Gary, which Gary more than liked. He wiped away whatever filth and crusty blood had smeared on his vest.

Gord kept fading in and out.

Tad and Bif carried him into the Gym shoving away by standards with Gary close behind. Practically rubbing is hands in excitement.

They set him onto the floor, yelling at each other angrily to be gentle. To be calm. To be… to be…

At least he was breathing.

"Maybe you should have, like, brought him to the hospital, Gary!" Bif practically shouted at Gary, who at this point, just wanted the credit of helping. He got his hands dirty and now he wanted the rewards.

"He'll be fine. A little concussion never hurt anyone."

With all the commotion, Derby stepped out of the main office on the second floor. Spotting Gary first and then Gord's pathetic face.

"It was Lola wasn't it, Gord?" he bellowed, descending the stairs like the king of the rich boys would. With a dramatic entrance. "She's filth. Trash. The lowest common denominator. Look at you! Your Aquaberry vest ruined!"

Gord struggled to even turn his head. With a bit of strength, spouting. "I'm in love with that filth."

Derby's decent was sped up as he lifted the smaller boy by his collar, spitting. "Keep it up and you'll be unwelcomed here. My daddy will talk to your daddy and then you'll be nothing! Absolutely nothing and then you can 'slum it' with her the right way; by you not owning a single cent!"

Gord was like a ragdoll. And he was out again. All the excitement putting him back into darkness halfway into Derby's scolding.

He let go of Gord, watching him fall back with a thud. "Worthless piece of-" Derby eyed Gary. Mild shock. Mild amusement. But still outraged. "My, my, my. Look what we have here boys. A rat. My, it's been a long summer."

"Derby." Gary said with disdain.

"Smith."

"I found Gord, I did you a favor."

"I believe you did pick up the trash but," he circled him, watching the blue assholes stare, "as I remember, you were told to never come back here. If Gord were conscious, I would make it an example to not follow down your path."

"You owe me, you inbred trust fund scum."

Derby cracked a ten thousand dollar dental job smile at this. "Oh Gary, you've been sorely missed."

Gary felt above these bastards.

"It was Johnny Vincent and his gang. Beat him with a pipe. I'm leaving."

"Do come back again. We could teach you more about boxing and less about scraping up less deserving people out of the gutter. It might however, give you another scar. A horrid blemish."

"Fuck off Derby."

And with that, he threw open the doors.


	11. Ancillariolus

She was there.

Auburn hair covering her face as she leaned down. And her lips were over his. The dull taste of cigarettes burned his senses. Red claws scratching down his bare chest. And the groans and moans she made were sickening.

The room spinning.

His arms and legs heavy, and he could not move them. Like the muscle relaxers that the orderlies would give by injections.

Like he was asleep but his eyes were open.

Bright red lips dragging across his cheek, leaving a waxy streak, making the way to the nape of his neck before he could feel his earlobe being peppered in small kisses. And then warmth. A tongue tracing his earlobe, lapping every curve before biting on the shell of it.

He could feel his stomach shift and move. Churning.

"I want to make you feel good, baby boy." she gasped out, as if she couldn't breathe. And then, he was somehow holding her hips. The fabric showing so much but so little at the same time. Warm to the touch.

She sat up on his lap, her body rocking into his. Reaching for her crop top, pulling it up, revealing red sequins and-

And then.

He was swallowed.

His mattress gone. The room gone. He was falling down and through a glass panel. Shards cutting him on his way down. Like mini paper cuts. Or grabbing a knife and pulling it.

He kept falling and he was all alone. No one around as he landed in soft padding. When he stood up, he tried to search for an exit. But as if it were sealed, there wasn't a way out.

Nobody there.

The soft padded cell held nobody but him.

And it was suffocating.

His eyes opened. He woke up, slick with sweat. He sat up like a fire was lit under him. Shaking, he threw his fists into his mattress. Covering his head with the pillow as he let out a loud scream.

As if his lid was no longer on as tight as it was supposed to have.

He held the sides of his head, practically pleading with himself. "Just stop bringing it up already!"

And as if he was no longer in control, what he didn't want to think about, he thought about. And it made his teeth chatter.

Then, he noticed it.

His eyes flickered to a red envelope laying on his wooden floor.

He had received a small pile but this one was different. He picked it up, sniffing it. As if the dream no longer affected him. His thoughts of the asylum far away.

It smelled like smoke and…

He opened it and neat handwriting put:

'To the cute boy with the scar,'

Gross

'What you did a while ago was very uncool. I would say even violent. I was debating telling Johnny but then, I found a bit of mercy for you. Skip first period and meet me at In-and-Out motel. We have a lot to discuss. Unless… we have to tell Johnny that you hurt me.'

Gary felt that swimming feeling in his gut. Thinking back to Gord almost dying in an alleyway.

'Room four, don't be late. Forever yours, Lola.'

It even was stamped with her lipstick. He touched it, rubbing it between his fingers. That waxy substance made his stomach coil. He licked it off his fingers and stuffed it in his pocket.

Why, of all the places around town, did she pick the In-and-Out motel? It was a regular hangout for those bullies. Why? That place screamed danger. It had crime scene tape. It had roaches. It had the occasional prostitute or shady figure.

Even the owner was weird.

It wasn't a nice spot.

Was it because she had already let Johnny know? Was it a set up? That him and his droogs would come out to play. Cover up his torture and death? Beat him with an iron pipe? Fuck his shit up?

He didn't know why, but Gary was drawn to the location. Wanting to know why. Why here. Why him.

Gary looked at the note, then up at the room door.

Room four, like it said.

The surroundings of Bullworth were covered in a thick dense fog. The bullies that tended to hang around the place were gone. The air was dense. Humidity clinging to him and making him feel heavy.

He swallowed roughly, eyeing all around as he knocked. There was a moment of silence before the door opened. However, it was only slightly as a chain and an eye came into view.

Familiar.

"Look at what we have here… my, you really came this early?"

"Look, I'm only here for my book. You wrote-"

Lola slammed the door in his face before a bunch of mechanical notches, wiggles and jiggles came from behind it as the door opened up wide.

Gary found an uncomfortable sight.

A sheer robe, lined with feathers came into view with what he expected was lingerie or something peeking underneath. He tried to not peek. It didn't really matter.

"What the fuck is this?"

"I really thought you were going to ditch me." She said smoothly, her lipstick smeared and her hair a mess. A finger poked out and attempted to wipe away the red wax. "Well, well, do you like what you see?"

"Is Johnny here?"

Lola took him by the wrist, pulling him into the motel room. She shut the door behind him. Sauntering to an already messy bed. She plopped down on it. The mattress creaking from under her. Worn out springs.

"Take a look around baby, it's just you and me."

Gary took that as an invitation. Starting to check the room more fully. Checking under the bed, in the closet. The bathroom and of course behind the dingy shower curtain. When he found nothing, he couldn't let himself relax. Finding his way back to the front door. Anxiously ringing his hands. His skin crawling. Paranoia taking over.

She stuck out a red claw, gesturing to him. A come hither. He did as she wanted, reluctantly. He sat on the bed next to her. She was warm. Her body radiating heat. Her body smelling like sweat and… so many things.

It made Gary retract a bit.

"Where's my book?" he fished his hand into his pocket, pulling out a crumpled note, "And why… this? Lola, what the hell is wrong with you? Do you want me dead too?"

"I got a lot of love to give, baby. And I wanted to see you. Maybe by twisting your arm a little bit too."

"I found Gord in a goddamn gutter not even a few days ago. This… you're blackmailing me!" he shook the note in front of her face. Standing to his feet agitatedly. "You set Gord up!"

"Baby, that's a harsh accusation! You think poor ol' me would do something that cruel?" she covered her face as she her breathing hitched, pretending to sob, sniffling. "We're just a bunch of freaks in this freak show called life!"

"Don't quit your day job."

She lifted her head. An annoyed expression plastered on her face. Probably because he wasn't that easy to manipulate like a meathead.

Gary swallowed as her hands were faster than lightning, looping her digits in the belt loops of his dress pants and drawing him closer. She grinned when the boy growled in response.

"You know why I invited you here? So we could be all alone. We could talk without any flies on the wall." She tugged him closer his body, crotch, too close to her face. It made him uncomfortable.

This is how Petey felt.

"I've missed you, Gary Smith. I wanna show you how much." She cooed in that soft sultry voice. "Is that such a crime?"

She had a sharp tongue too. Soaked in honey. Soothing, yet, ready to strike at an instant.

Gary's eyebrows narrowed down and he stuck out a hand, holding her head back to stop her from getting any closer. "Shut up already. What do you want, whore?"

He couldn't see her face, her auburn hair curtained over her features. But he could certainly tell she was pissed.

"Let me go and I'll tell you."

"Tramps first."

Lola didn't just let go, with strength, she shoved Gary. It took him somewhat off guard. He laughed at this.

"If you want to fuck, I already did." She smiled at this, practically gritting out, "It was Juri Karamazov."

"That foreign Jock?" Gary said in surprise.

"Yeah. I fucked him good. Actually, he was the best fuck, I had ever had!'

Gary threw his hands up and this, bellowing, "You can perform a human goddamn function, Lola! Congratulations! You want a gold star for it? If you're trying to dig at me, try a little harder than that."

Boy, everyone outside the motel could probably hear all of it perfectly. Through the walls too. They probably were paper thin.

Lola crossed her arms, pouting. Her red lipstick shining in the dim lighting of the motel. "Well, I've set up a little, er, event. Reservation for two."

"Where? Blue Balls Pool Hall in New Coventry?" Gary shot back. Practically wanting to scream at her to get to the point.

"The comic book shop."

"…You cant be serious."

"I heard from my little Algie that you helped them find their little books. I told him that we're going to have some afternoon fun."

"Are you serious?"

"Very much."

She fell back dramatically, pulling covers close to her face. Eyes predatory. "You are a valiant knight to them. So, if you like them so much, lets hang out with them. Think of it as a date."

"A date with you? No way!"

"Oh Gary, you hurt me so bad the other night. My lips are sore, my head is sore. You were like a vicious animal!" she bellowed, kicking her feet and arms. Similar to a toddler. "I'm traumatized!"

"Keep jabbering and I will hurt you."

"Do it. I bet you won't. You'll just make up a lame excuse."

He made his way over to the bed. The mattress creaking as it dipped with his weight. Gary settled above her. Straddling her. She kept staring at him. Kept tempting him.

Kept staring. Kept looking. Looking. Challenging.

Gary's hands found themselves around her neck and she made a sound of surprise. He smiled devilishly at her before raising that scarred brow in pleasure. She writhed from under him. Holding onto the sheets.

"Should I put pressure on your arteries or on your trachea?" he tilted his head. "Or just squeeze until you stop moving your fucking jaw?"

He put more pressure down watching her skin turn a faint red.

Gary let go finally. Finding the strangulation… very erotic almost. Maybe that wasn't the right word. It made him happy. It made him feel in control over her.

Lola huffed and puffed. Holding her neck. A sound of a slap drew him from his thoughts. His face practically turned to the side from the force. Lola tossed him off of her.

"I didn't think you'd be a psycho about it Gary!" she stomped her way into the bathroom, peeking out before growling, "I'll get dressed. You can wait out here."

Gary rolled onto his back, the shit mattress groaning as he did so. Letting out an uncomfortable sigh.


	12. Oderint Dum Metuant

When Lola reappeared from the motel bathroom, she was looking her same old self. Makeup reapplied. Not a strand of hair out of place. Her perfume smelling more like her. Her eyes full of fire. Mischievous as ever. The throttling he had given her long gone from memory.

Her red lips curved into a smile.

"Let's hit the road, tough guy!"

"But Lola-"

"But nothing!" She snatched up whatever was sitting there, marinating on that moldy looking chair, placing that something on her hip. Lola motioned to Gary.

"Move it!"

Gary had to catch up to her as she was already outside. Making her way to some moped. Bright red. Hard to miss.

Gary grimaced as he stood in that fog. It was too muggy for his liking. The autumn breeze was a far off memory today. He hated the fog. Hated the fog. Hated…

She sat on someone's Vespa. She fastened the helmet on her head. Turning to Gary.

"We leaving?"

It took him off guard. He was coming to the slow realization that this was hers. A motorized vehicle and Lola's vanity… He could almost imagine her zooming by a store window and while she admired herself, she would crash into a light pole.

That made him snicker however.

"What are you laughing at?" she grumbled, "Get on!"

"I'm not riding on that deathtrap!"

"You don't want to ride with me?" she mulled, before coming to a realization, "You don't want to ride bitch!"

"I don't want to ride on it. Period."

Lola held her sides as she snickered and sneered. It only made Gary growl. He jumped on the back. Trying to find something to hold onto when it roared to life. The tires spun before he jerked back. Holding onto her leather jacket as she tore off. Gary ducked behind her shoulders. She didn't seem like a little speed demon… but seeing how she got her kicks, it made sense.

He closed his eyes. Listening to the breeze that whizzed passed his ears. The early morning. The smell of the ocean breeze. And holding her waist. The warmth radiating from her leather. He found himself resting onto her back, holding her waist. Relaxing into her. Melting into her.

Well, before he caught himself, that is.

Gary basically gagged himself.

Lola had a really negative effect on him. He was being blackmailed, he needed to act like it. Not cuddle up to her. Why was he acting like this anyways?

He watched the world whizz by. The shapes of people muddled by the clouds of mist.

"Why do you get the helmet anyways?" he hollered at her, quite suddenly. "If anything, I need it!"

"Because I'm the brains! Duh!" her head turned partially, screaming back to him. "You think I would risk dying?"

Lola turned sharply. Splashing him with muddy and dingy water. He shivered as the water made the wind even colder. "You bitch!"

He could hear her giggle. Her back rumbling. "Hey! Wanna do that again, kid?"

"Jeez, can you even drive this thing?"

"I'm an excellent driver, I'll have you know!" she spat.

Lola saw the comic book shop and the tires squealed. The Vespa coming to a creaky stop. Long legs spreading out and holding the moped upright.

"See? Precious cargo all in one piece."

Gary glared at her. Wobbly legs standing on land. Real land. He felt his stomach churn. He held his abdomen. He didn't want to have another vomiting fit.

"How was that, you little brat?"

Lola kicked out the kickstand, letting the roaring hum cease. She unclasped the buckle on her helmet. Lifting it and letting her auburn locks fall back into place. She smoothed it down. Placing the cap on the seat of that Vespa deathtrap.

When Gary looked at her. She was staring. She was smiling. Her eyes shining. Her dimples deep.

And he hated that about her.

Lola was always smiling. Always looking at him.

"Well? Whatcha thinkin', tough guy?"

"What are the right words for it?" Gary pondered aloud, putting a finger to his chin, spouting, "Thrilling? Stupid? Moronic? A rattle trap?"

"Stop acting like a rough tough guy already. Look, they're waiting for us." She gestured to the window, placing a hand on his shoulder.

He saw green vests. Bad posture. He could almost smell them from here. Before he knew it, she pushed him inside. Everyone looking at the two.

As if they were expecting them.

He really wished it was a cruel joke.

"There they are!" Algie practically shouted as the rest of the nerds chimed in. Welcoming them inside their domain.

Gary, of all people, welcomed here.

It had to be a joke.

"I told you Gary wanted to play!"

They waved them to the table against the wall. Miniature figurines and landscapes covered the table. He could smell the place. It made his lip curl up in disgust.

It wasn't a full house of nerds, however.

But the kingpin was there.

Melvin, Earnest, Beatrice and Algie.

Beatrice was the only one that didn't seem so happy. Beady eyes on Lola.

Girls were girls after all.

Lola walked in a room and all eyes were on her. It didn't matter what kind of notoriety she gained, she just accepted it as attention.

Bitch.

Earnest stood, speaking for all the nerds because it was the only thing that nerd could do. That and read dirty magazines.

"Welcome! I did the honors of setting up your character sheet, Gary." Earnest said with an awkward wince, gesturing to the positively round boy with a faulty zipper, "I left Lola's sheet up to Algie… I do not wish to be interrogated by Johnny later."

When earnest sat, he mumbled something about Algie liking blondes.

"I made you into a paladin!" Algie excitingly handed his sheet to Lola. The woman bent down and patted his head. Like an owner of a pet would. "And I tried to make it like you said you wanted! With permission from the Game Master, of course."

"And I made you into a bard because… we needed one!" Earnest handed Gary his sheet. "Don't worry! We've provided everything! Dice, sheets, figures… Think of it as payment for finding our sheets!"

Joy.

And with that the game started.

Or at least, Gary thought it did.

After an antagonizing long process of listening to everyone talk in ye old accents. Rolling and conversations dead ending. Awkward silences with bursts of nerd rage. Gary's eyes felt heavy. He rested his head into his hand. Lazily watching each overweight nerd fight with an underweight nerd about something in the manual.

The story went something like this. They went into a tavern and met some alchemist. They got a great quest to acquire some goblin tears or whatever for that weirdo.

"I will get those goblin tears for you for twenty five bucks." Lola said with a wink. To who, Gary wasn't sure. He thought she was just as clueless on how to play this stupid game.

"It's groats, actually." Beatrice corrected her. Her glasses slipping down the bridge of her nose before pushing them back up. "I really wish you read the manual, Lola."

"And I wish your herpes around your mouth would heal, B."

The girls obviously had some shit going on.

But for over enthusiastic nerds, they didn't play as much as they talked about playing. There was always something wrong. Gary wanted to flip the table. Wanted to pounce and stab one through the eye with a real dagger.

He hated this.

He hated to pretend. He didn't want to rule pretend land. He wanted to rule for real. He didn't want to kill and loot in a fantasy.

He wanted to watch everyone burn.

"I rolled my two d-ten! Eleven! My mage uses magic missiles!" Earnest proclaimed, pointing a finger at small plastic figure, "I aim right at that savage goblin."

"…what about rolling for each missile?" Melvin piped in.

"You don't roll for each missile!" Earnest crossed his arms in annoyance.

Melvin clearly too offence to this. Being the biggest nerd of G&G in school. "Uh, yes you do! It clearly says in the manual."

"Where in the world does it say that?!"

"Magic missile never misses!" Beatrice piped up.

"This isn't about missing!" Algie proclaimed, holding his head. "All this fighting. Oh, my weak bladder can't take all this pressure you guys!"

"Go!" the nerds said in collective shouts.

Algie scooted out of the creaking chair. "Don't play without me this time!" He was practically running into the back. Or in his case, waddling very quickly.

And the three were back into their spat.

Gary's head rested in his palm. Looking out the window longingly. Wondering what Jimmy and Petey were doing. He felt it.

Red nails dancing along his thigh. Long claws scratching the fabric. He peered down to fingers walking up to the edge of his thigh. He glanced at the hand and then to the woman it was attached to.

She was watching him from the corner of her eye. Looking half attentive. Half amused. With him most likely. Gary couldn't help but feel those flip flops again in his stomach.

That bitch.

"Can I ask if my bitc- I mean, my personal bard could play a song to enhance magic missiles?" she suggested. Her hand drawing away. Like she was an expert at this.

Gary eye's shot daggers at the woman. He hated her. Officially.

"I believe Gary's Bard has a cantrip that'll help! Vicious Mockery!" Earnest winced but fidgeted excitedly in his seat. "Lead us to victory!"

"Use it Gary!" Beatrice said.

"Okay, I use it."

"No, you gotta roll!" Melvin scolded him. Rather harshly too.

"Fine, this one?" Gary held up a many sided die. He was unsure about it, waiting for some sort of answer when Melvin scoffed.

"Uh, no, you're attacking. It's a one d-four. As in four sides."

Gary plucked up the grease coated die. Wanting to toss it right back into his face. But, he sighed. He's have his time.

He flicked it right at Melvin's cardboard divider. Wishing the Game Master's papers would burn away.

"Crit! Nice! What do you say?"

"Say?"

"Well we are playing a role playing game."

Tired of his sarcasm and growing absolutely weary of this shit. Gary planted his hands on the table and leaned towards Melvin. Teeth gnashing. "What are you going to do for a face when the monkey wants his ass back?"

Melvin tugged his collar uncomfortably, "You say lots of mean things to the goblin and hurt his feelings."

Boy, he sure wanted to tell Melvin a whole bunch of 'mean things'. Mostly to fuck off.

"The goblin's saving throw fails! You hit him for six damage!"

"Oh my, maybe you should've been a warrior. You could have handled a big weapon and protected us all!" Lola's hand was back as it traveled across his crotch.

Gary grumbled.

It was a bunch of nonsense.

"As he runs away he drops an item. When you pick it up, you discover it is the goblin's tears!"

"What a hero!" Beatrice fawned.

The two sat close so it was really unnoticeable but… it still worried him. Prying eyes. Paranoia. Her hand rested on him. Eyes flickering back to the game.

Lola was… interesting.


	13. Purge

Gary leaned against the metal guard rail. Looking down at the carnival. Hearing the delighted laughs of children and teens alike. Arrays of colors shining. It was already dusk. He wanted to relax and get away from it all.

He started to fantasize about running away…

Too bad Lola took him here after that whole Grottos and Gremlins incident.

Grottos and Gremlins thing was really too stupid.

He just wanted to go home. Back to his dorm.

The parking lot was empty. The black top moist from fog, and the drizzle throughout the day. It was eerily quiet.

When they sped off on that Vespa rattle trap, away from that stupid comic book shop, he couldn't have been happier.

Fuck those nerds. Morons.

The light. The sound. The smell. Lola.

It was too overwhelming for him. He rubbed his index finger into his thumb. He felt so paranoid. So… overstimulated. Like the kettle was going to boil over and spill, and there was nothing he could do.

He felt helpless.

Gary's eyes narrowed. Searching for something. He couldn't put his eyes on it though. He felt her. Lola's arms wrapping around him. Leather feeling so warm yet so distant.

And that was Lola.

Warm. Distant. Here but gone.

A ghost.

A breath tickled his neck as he realized she had nuzzled herself into the crook of his shoulder. Smiling against his cheek.

"Whatcha thinkin' bout, tough guy?"

"Bullworth. Jimmy. Pete." He said absentmindedly.

"You really wanna rule the school? Even after last year?" Lola's fingers rubbed little circles into his shoulders. "You could have died, you know? You and Jimmy both. I heard you were out cold the entire time you got hauled to Happy Volts."

Too much stimulation.

"I wanna take over that place…" he trailed off.

"But what? Afraid? Gary Smith? The big bad sociopath afraid?"

Gary ignored her words. Feeling her warmth disappear. When his eyes met her again, she was placing a cigarette between her lips. The smell of burning tobacco tickled his nostrils.

"You wouldn't understand." His eyes turning back to the carnival. Still searching. Still looking. Still searching… still…

"Oh? A special case, hm? Your teen angst is oh so different from everyone else." She leaned against the metal beside him. Eyes at just the right angle, they were catching the carnival lights. Almost glowing. "Everyone wants to rule Bullworth. Johnny is no exception, either. So no, you're not special."

"And how would you know any of this?"

She waddled the cigarette up and down between her teeth. Letting out a deep breath of smoke. Clouding around her. "I have my influence in every single faction at the school. And I get on with them quiet well. Bullies. Jocks. Nerds. Preppies. Hell, sometimes even townies. Only thing is, I don't shit where I eat."

It took Gary a second to realize what she meant before speaking slowly. Coming to a realization, "you don't date the other greasers..."

"Of course not. They would rat me out for sure." She smirked, her eyes shut. "It's definitely my kind of flavor. But I'm not a one kind of flavor gal."

"What flavor am I?"

"Psycho. Baby boy. But also a bitch." She said softly. Rolling off her tongue effortlessly. Like she didn't have to think.

"I think you described yourself."

She laughed at this, the cigarette burning faster than Gary thought that one could finish one. She didn't savor it, that's for sure. Exhaling through her nostrils, she tossed the nub into the weeds. "Gary. Gary. Gary. You're too much fun."

There was a silence between the two.

Why did she bring him here? Why didn't she take him home? Why here?

Why were they always alone?

She was faster than any snake. The way she coiled around him with ease. That he ended up like this again, it was unreal. She was forcing herself in his arms as close as she could. Invading his space. Gary found himself limp at her touch.

Lola's hands exploring his back. Face too close to his.

"How are you ever going to take over a school when you're still so scared of me?"

He didn't answer. And when he didn't, she demanded his attention. Stomping his foot with her sharp heel. Gary was drawn out of his thoughts, grabbing her shoulders with animosity. Teeth gnashing.

"You fucking bitch!"

"That's more like it. Now, kiss me you moron."

Gary tossed her aside, placing his itching hands into his pockets. Afraid of what they might do.

"Keep acting like a whore and you're going to end up as messed up as Gord. And if your greaseball friends see me with you, I wouldn't be surprised if Johnny kills us both."

Lola's heels scraped against the blacktop. She let out a noise of confusion. "That's not my problem, babe. Johnny loves me. Not you."

"You would say that, you fucking-"

Like that, Lola stomped up to him. Grabbing his face. Her face too close to his as she spat. Her voice at a low growl.

"Just because I have a lot of love to give, doesn't make my decisions any less mine. What I do is my business. What you do is yours. Johnny might have me, but he doesn't own me. Stay on my good side and maybe Johnny won't kick your ass."

Her rough, tough grip turned into a gentle grasp. Petting his cheek. Her words light and feathery now.

"I like you Gary. You're my plaything. Just like the rest. And I think its fun. You're a lot of fun Gary. You give me everything. And what you don't, I get from other guys."

Lola tipped down to him, lips landing on the top on his head. Smiling that same stupid smile. Those stupid, moronic eyes on him.

"And if I get bored of you, I'll replace you. Simple."

Her words rattled his body. Gary wiped his forehead off angrily. And the kettle started to boil. Grabbing her arm, he twisted roughly. Causing the woman to cry out in pain.

"Quit touching me!" he screamed in her face, "Or I'll really hurt you, you slut."

When he threw her arm, Lola couldn't help but laugh. Amused. Maybe. His words useless.

"Such a cute baby. You're exciting. The way you can snap in an instant like that. You could kill me if you wanted to. Hurt me real bad. You wont though. You're in love Gary Smith. Just like everyone else!"

Gary wanted to watch the woman crumble below him. He couldn't dare touch her. Protected by a psycho. Protected by scummy guys. That bitch. That…

"Get real man! I don't love you. I hate your guts."

"Is that why you keep coming to see me? Spending a lot of time with me?" she got closer and closer. His personal space raped by her presence. "Keep in mind I don't love you either Gary. Keep that in mind and we wont have any issues at all."

Lola wrapped her arms around his shoulders, tilting her head. "I'm sorry for riling you up, okay?"

She wasn't. He knew she wasn't.

"Kiss me, baby. Accept my apology."

The sounds of the carnival. The humid air. The unbearable sound of his own heartbeat.

Lola repeated, sounding more demanding. "Kiss me."

"Just a kiss?"

"Just a kiss."

Gary had to lean into her to reach her lips. The way they felt. The way they tasted. It was poisonous. It was… really bad. He was wrapped around her finger, unwillingly. It fatigued him to kiss her. Like she was sucking out his soul. Her fingers like hot coals as they ran through his hair. Gary hated that maddening dance of lips. The bitch would be in an old textbook of demonology. A succubus.

Her tongue creeping passed his lips. His teeth protecting him, like a barrier, as he tried to push her away. Lola would not budge. Trying to deepen something that he refused. He growled into her mouth. As if she were some type of facehugger or something.

His hands and legs started to tremble.

It all felt too familiar to him. The force.

He didn't feel well. The feeling in his stomach started again.

Like a boat on a rough sea, his stomach churned.

Lola wouldn't let him go. His chest started to rise and fall uncontrollably. Like he was going to burst. His brain swimming in paranoia, panic and something else.

It was too much.

When she let go in anger, he pushed himself far away from her. Placing his arms around himself he didn't know what else to do. Gary's hands instantly went to his mouth as he started to belch and gag. His head singing like alarms. The only thing it told him to do was to get away. To get out.

And like that he was running. He didn't know why. The mess erupted from his mouth as soon as he stopped. Eyes watering.

He couldn't stop himself as it hit his feet in a sloppy mess.

He could hear Lola behind him. Keeping up with him. Hot on his vomit trail.

"Jesus Christ kid!" she placed a hand on his shoulder.

"Leave me alone!" Gary retched when she placed a hand on his shoulder, "I don't want to be around you anymore tonight."

"It was just a little kiss."

Gary spat at her feet. Vomit and saliva. The spitting cobra. Spitting poison.


	14. New Mindset

Gary laid in his bed. Still nauseated from the days passed. He had to see the nurse. Officially. He hated the way he was examined. Eyes pried open, a flash light on him. Mouth exploration with a popsicle stick.

It reminded him of the psyche wards exams. Clammy skin. Doctors with masks. Sterile environments. Holding him down.

The way he was examined. Like an animal.

Then he was summoned to bed rest. A bug. Maybe the flu. Nothing serious.

Gary doubted it.

Petey would stop by to drop off homework. He had no qualms with that. It was better than playing catch up. Jimmy would peek in time to time. Making sure he was still breathing.

Gary disliked how he never knocked. And was a moron.

But it seemed as though something changed.

He moaned as he had to have his prescriptions refilled. He stopped taking his meds a while ago. The pill bottle collecting dust. The psychologist visits having to be set up again by order of Crabblesnitch.

God.

Gary sprawled out in his crummy cot in his crummy bedroom. Reading quietly. Nice of Petey to grab him a book. Unfortunately it was a science book. Tesla.

What a loser. He fell in love with a goddamn bird. Then he died.

Edison was better. The thief.

His head kept humming.

Gary wet his lips in frustration. Sitting up on the cot. Kicking an empty aluminum bucket with his foot. The nurse had loaned it to him. It reeked of bleach.

He peered under his bed. Remembering that magazine that Earnest had. The lewd one. He had discarded it under his cot. Hoping that it would go unseen by all. Snatching it up he got himself comfortable.

He skimmed through it.

It was nothing but large busted women in compromising positions. It really didn't do much for him. He wasn't the lustful type. He didn't think about women. Didn't think about them doing lewd acts. With him. With others. Skin moist with sweat and huffing and puffing coming from pouty lips. Pistons of human flesh. The sounds people would make behind locked doors. It didn't interest Gary. Seeing people in pain… oh if he could, he would make love to the suffering of others. He was sadistic, yes.

But the woman in the magazine just made him think of someone. Gary grumbled something along the lines of it being trash, tossing it aside.

Lola. Trash. Synonymous with each other. That…

Gary couldn't believe that woman. She was so obscene. So awful. Deceptive. Manipulative

Lola was red. Striking. Harsh. Evil.

It made his stomach flip flop. Every time he thought of her. And unfortunately, he'd been thinking of her a lot.

She was stupid. Scummy. Idiotic. Moronic.

But…

He tossed onto his side. His ears ringing with embarrassment.

Of all people, why her? Why was she always there. In the back of his mind.

Because.

Lola was as much of a manipulative bastard as he was. Lola was in deep with each clique. She was somewhere. Always somewhere. Like poison seeping in a water supply.

She was everywhere.

Even with Gary. In some small way, that poison even tainted him.

Sadistic. Johnny hated it. Hated her, but she was the school's whoreish Ghandi.

She made peace with her hole.

Disgusting.

And with her tongue she could convince anyone, even the idiots at school, that Gary was benevolent.

Gary stomach leaped but he rose in joy. Holding his head and then letting out a noise of giddy.

"That stupid bitch!"

If he got in good with Lola. He got in good with the cliques. If he got in good with the cliques, he could rule.

He could rule by force.

A weak knock drew him from his thoughts. With another meek knock, Pete came in. Shutting the door behind him. Polite. But meek. Weak. Faggot.

"He-hey man! How are you feeling? Better?"

Gary's feet plopped onto the hard wood. Feeling himself jitter with happiness, "Never better! I think I got over my little problem."

"Oh! Hey, that's great!" he said almost uncertainly. Probably never knowing what to expect from him. Gary liked that. "Um, does that mean you'll be going back to class and doing stuff tomorrow?"

Gary smiled a stupid grin, gapped teeth glimmering with devilish glee. "I gotta head into town first. I need something if I want to succeed here at Bullworth!"

"Like school supplies?"

"You could say that… it's a tool of sorts."

Pete stood awkwardly at the door as Gary manically dressed himself. Tossing pajamas aside and jumping into that stupid uniform. As Petey watched in bizarre bewilderment. A man, on his deathbed. Puking his lungs out. Now full of vigor.

Gary was always changing. Always thinking. Always moving.

"You got your show, Pete." Gary seethed, shoving Petey aside. Feeling the boy fall into the door. "Get lost!"

The boy made a sound of disgust. Righting himself. "Gary, god man, maybe you've got a fever or something?"

"Later Petey!" Gary giggled to himself. Waving from down the hall.

Lola. His throne. Her body. His mind. Her lips. His chest rising and falling in excitement. His pores leaking sweat. He hissed a breath through his teeth.

His.

His.

His.

His.

Well, until Petey came running after Gary. "Wait, I heard that… you've joined swim team. That's not like you. I mean… is it?"

The words made him stop midstep. He turned quickly. "Uh, what?"

"Yeah! The preppies have been talking about it. They're kinda excited… in their own way."

Gary closed the gap between the two. Petey's body physically flinched at this.

"I didn't join anything."

"But your name was on the list on the bulletin board-"

He put a finger to his chin before cursing out loud. Making haste to that stupid bulletin board. Unfortunately Constantinos was hogging the board. And Gary was in a hurry.

That woman. That stupid woman. Out of every conceivable way to get him to move, he shoved Constantinos away from the bulletin board. Causing the teen to yelp in pain as he fell to the wooden floor with a thud.

"Why did you do that?" the boy whined. The school's punching bag and mascot continued. "What am I? Just like, some nobody you can shove down to the floor?!"

"Shut up."

"Gary, you psycho-"

The boy knelt down. Grabbing the mascot by his collar. Eyes wide and spit flying out as he screamed. "Shut up! I can't think when you're talking like that!"

Constantinos swallowed roughly. His body trembling. Gary let go and continued his search. Flipping through papers. As he scanned through tryout forms.

Then he saw it.

Seeing his name. In girlish writing.

Tomorrow.

Tryouts were tomorrow.

Swim team.

"That fucking bitch!"


	15. Aquae Metu

Gary woke up that day. Feeling better. The same old routine would begin again. Except his throat raw. A persisting, lingering feeling in his throat. His stomach as empty as his room.

Gary laid there. Stairing up at the crummy wooden ceiling. He couldn't believe that she signed him up for swimming. He could barely sleep last night. Worst part was that he didn't have a choice, he had to swim. Otherwise she would make his life a living hell with Johnny. He didn't need that greasy meat head on his case.

It only made him more and more angry. First she forced herself on him and now this. She was a wobbly stepping stone. Unpredictable.

….But that unpredictability made everything interesting.

Going through the preening process of making sure he looked perfect, he was presentable to the world. As he approached his door, the sound of paper crunched under his shoe. More notes under his door. With a groan of annoyance, he kicked them aside. That was until his shoe collided with something that made a loud clunk. He looked down to a cleanly wrapped box. Gary tilted his head at the forgien object. He knelt and plucked it up. His fingers shaking. The only way that someone could have delivered a box was to open his door… And he didn't remember one last night.

That means some asshole had been in his room.

He grit his teeth painfully. Mentally going through suspects. Whoever it was, he would kill them.

With frustration, he ripped open the box with little hesitation. Laying at the bottom was a speedo with a letter, sealed with a lipstick kiss.

This fucking bitch.

He opened it and read off what it had said: 'Good luck tough guy! I'll be rooting for you in the stands. I expect you to do well. Also, a little something for the head boy. Maybe something for me too. Lola.'

Gary's face flushed and his cheeks became rosey with embarrassment and rage.

No way.

No way.

No fucking way.

He stuffed the package along with the note under his bed. Letting out a sound disgust. Knowing that the dirty magazine would get along well with the scantily clad article of swimwear.

She was here again and left something beside his bed. Like a whorish tooth fairy.

He left his dorm room and stepped into bustling halls. Loud as ever. And the students were packed like fish in cans. Doing god knows what. Gary shoved through a few people dawdling. Dodging a football two jocks were tossing around. With a second look at the two losers, to shoot them a look, he knocked right into Jimmy.

The two boys collided and fell onto their asses. Gary was the first to his feet. Practically jumping up. Gnashing as he spat. "Look where you're walking loser!"

"I'm the loser, Gary? Open your eyes and quit flirting with those jocks!" Jimmy said with that oh-so sing song bullshit.

The ginger groaned as he tried to get himself up. But before he could sit up, Gary stepped over and held out his hand to Jimmy. Extending the olive branch. When the ginger reached for him, Gary briskly stepped away.

Leaving Jimmy high and dry. And on his ass.

"Real mature." Jimmy growled. Shooting up.

Gary let out a little laugh at this. And Jimmy just scowled. They continued down the hall together, right into the common room. Spotting that little faggot. Petey sitting on that couch. The was television off, surprisingly. Gary wouldn't have been surprised if the kid was squirted out next to a television.

"Hey guys!" The boy craned his neck back, waving to the two. "Good morning!"

And like old times, Jimmy and Gary both sat next to Petey. Sinking into that ugly forest green couch. As if nothing had happened a year ago.

"Swimming now? Doing Petey here some fan service?" the pale ginger said snarky.

A shock ran through Pete, his whole body sitting straighter. "Jimmy! Th-that's not cool man!"

Gary smirked at the comment. "Find it in your little pea brain that maybe I want to try something new. Morons."

"Yeah, but doesn't it seem out of character for you, Gary? It's just kinda weird that a totalitarian like yourself is picking up swimming." Jimmy jabbed at him. Again. He was pushing it.

"You don't know me Jimmy!" Gary stood suddenly. And for Petey it was like the whole incident on the couch all over again. Minus Zoe. He shrunk up while Gary yelled. "You're all weak pathetic people who don't even try to know me!"

The silence was deafening.

"…Jimmy has a point. It's kind of something we never could see you doing."

Gary waved them off. Storming away from the two in his usual fashion. "Yeah, whatever."

He was already close to dorm exit when Petey called back. "But, we'll come to cheer you on!"

Morning class came and went. Uncharacteristically slow. Unfortunately, he had noticed he had gotten the attention of Beatrice. Because she wouldn't stop staring at him in chemistry. And then Earnest bombarding him in the halls. Wanting favors. Going on and on. The trip to the nerdy comic book shop with Lola only made things worse with those morons. They were like puppies that wouldn't stop praising him.

Nerds. They sucked. But the jocks sucked just as bad. He groaned and moaned about those idiots. Making his way down the stairs to the locker room. But he hated the jocks as much as every other clique. He also hated the locker room. It smelled. Like chlorine, fungus and jock itch.

He expected to see jocks. But when he saw a handful of preppies, he was taken off guard.

"Well, well, what do we have here? Smith."

Gary met eyes with him. He was a fast swimmer of all Bullworth. Justin Vandervelde. Had records at the school. Metaphorical medals.

"Justin. What a surprise." Gary spat.

"You of all people want to join swim team? You? I was surprised when Derby told me you showed your ugly mug at our boxing gym. Pathetic. Like a dog begging for scraps!"

Gary took that as a challenge. Tired of those scummy trust fund losers. He closed the gap between him and Justin. The prep backed off. Only a few steps anyways.

But that was enough to show Gary that he shot fear into him.

"Keep it up and I'll break your jaw. And then your daddy can pay the nice doctors to wire your mouth shut and fix that inbred overbite of yours!"

All eyes were on the two. Preppies. Nerds. Greasers. A jock or two.

"You- you can't say that to me! Someone of my caliber should not be treated like this! I should show you the way how a man handles threats!" he held up his fists in an offensive stance.

A round boy came waddling up to the pair. Placing his grimy hands out on each boys' chest. Algie's goggles were fogged up and his body just and pimpley and deformed. "You can't talk to Gary like that! Just because you're rich and good-looking jerk!"

Justin and Gary gave each other a look of agreement on something as they both shoved Algie out of the middle.

"You wanna fight me? Did I strike a nerve with you? Or are you afraid I'll show you up at try-outs?" Gary shot back.

Gord with his broken face intervened and pulled Justin away. Somehow good with the preps. Or at least semi good. Winking at Gary with his one good eye. It looked more like a blink. Justin hissed something under his breath.

Gary wanted this to be over. He changed into his trunks. Mind wandering back to the speedo.

Disgusting.

Maybe it wasn't all bad. Maybe become king of the school. Drown a preppie.

It was a win-win.

The horde of boys sat on a bench while a frustrated art and photography teacher, Ms. Phillips stood with clipboard in hand. Her outfit was subtle but sexually charged. The tight sweater and the skirt. Gary couldn't believe she could get away with wearing something so… well, subtly slutty.

The school fell on hard times when the gym teach got fired over being a weird molester and an idiot. Some say he hired a student to steal panties from female students.

Fucking creep.

"Well, hello, gentlemen. I'm Miss Philips and it is my pleasure to induct you into the world of swim tryouts."

She went off the list of boys. Crossing out a few no-shows. Long boots stopped in front of Gary. His head crooked up. A smile was slowly creeping across her lips. "Well, well, Gary Smith. What brings a hot tempered spirit like yourself here, hm?"

"I want to swim, obviously." Gary deadpanned. "Is it a crime I wasn't aware of?"

"It really shows a different side of you. Maybe a few laps will cool down your hot headed nature." Ms. Phillips let out a little titter. "Well, let's swim, shall we? The goal here is laps. I'll set a time limit. You're more than welcome to use any form of swimming as long as you don't sink to the bottom."

The sound of heavy doors and Gary's eyes wandered to a group of people pouring in. Sitting on the bleachers. Apparently cheering on their friends. Or watching for their amusement. Who knows. Pathetic.

That was, until Jimmy and Pete came strolling in, all eyes were on them. The famous boys on campus.

They really came. He thought they were just kidding.

Where was Lola? Nowhere in sight. No leather clad woman. He kept starring. Kept waiting.

One by one. People approached the edge and flung themselves into the water. Like sheep to slaughter.

A name was called. A whistle blown and a dive into the deep.

Gary's eyes would flicker from swimming boys to the entrance. No Lola. Not yet.

Justin was called and like Adonis, he wowed people with his style and grace and whatever bullshit those idiots were easily amused by. It didn't amuse him. Gary wanted to drown him. Drag him under the water until his lifeless corpse would bob above water. Maybe fix his overbite by crushing his skull.

Each stroke was calculated. And his 'friends' in the bleachers cheered and cheered. Even non-preppies. It made him... angry? No, just disgusted.

Eight fucking laps in two minutes. Almost five hundred yards in two minutes.

Fuck him.

And again, Ms. Phillips gave Gary another encouraging smile. He hated it.

"Now Gary. It is your turn. Astound us with your talent and make swimming an illustrious art. Wow us." She said with a breath of wonderment at her own words. "Turn your teen angst into a machine of muscle and bone!"

Gary steadied himself before the sound of a whistle echoed off tiled walls and into his brain. He could feel the vibration behind his eyes. He dove in and the memories came flooding back. The way he would laugh. Memories coming back in waves. Ripples. Still fresh.

He just wanted to wash them away.

With each stroke all he could think about were those preps. How ignorant they were. Inbred trust fund scum. How dare they. Those fuckers.

"Go Gary! GO!" He could hear Jimmy. Screaming. Like an idiot. He couldn't see anything. Just blue. Nothing but blue. And fog.

Water. Waves. Chlorine.

When he made it to one side, he propelled to the other. Almost mindlessly.

The flashes of light under his eyelids. He could feel cold, damp air. Then felt his cheek against Lola's back. And the leather was radiating warmth. The salty sea air assaulted his nose. And nothing else existed. Just that stupid Vespa. Lola. And the outside world.

He could hear her voice. But nothing said in particular. Just her stupid voice.

No swimming pool. No preps. No Jimmy screaming like a goddamn idiot.

And when he started to think… he got lost in it. Sunk down into it.

A small, tiny part of him hoped she was watching.

He barely heard Ms. Phillips blowing her whistle. Everything was gone.

Gary was so into thinking, he almost didn't feel a hand trying to jerk him back. Ms. Phillips looking concerned as she bent down. As if he were drowning. "Way to blow us out of the metaphorical water, Gary. But don't flaunt your talent!"

Gary huffed and puffed. Wiping away water that was seeping into his eyes. "What are you tal- what are you talking about?" he reiterated. "Did I do good or something?"

"Gary, you did six laps in two minutes. That's very impressive." She hummed to herself out loud, "Just think of how well you would perform in one of my art classes."

He looked passed the art teacher blabbering on and on and saw someone standing. A silloutette. A woman's. Lola. She was leaned against the wall. Out of sight from the other onlookers. Arms crossed. Eyebrows furrowed.

Her features softened. And she gave Gary a smile, before disappearing into the dimly lit hall.

His stomach flip-flopped. His throat still raw from the vomiting. But could feel the splash of stomach acid.

He didn't know whether to smile because of the tremendous ego boost. Or the way that Justin's heart was probably breaking over his shitty record coming so close to being broken.

Fuck him.

Fuck the preps.


	16. Sequax

Gary was seated on a bench near the gym lockers. The swim tryouts were over. And his head was still swimming laps of it's own. He assumed he needed to eat something. He did skip breakfast after all. Jimmy and Petey. Those fuckers distracting him. He had waited until the locker room had cleared out before decompressing on the bench. Having a moment to himself.

Hands found themselves on his on his face. Elbows resting on his knees. Towel resting on the back of his neck. Hair drooping over his forehead. Dripping with pool chemicals. And maybe piss. Algie did swim at tryouts.

Heels resonated from the halls. Echoing off tile. Gary swore to himself. If it was Ms. Phillips, he was going to tell her off. Was she going to smile at him some more? Instead, a familiar face peeked in.

Cherry lips and narrowed eyes. She flashed a smile and continued inside. Lola put a hand on her hip, cocking it out. "Well, hello hello, tough guy. Or should I call you a pool boy now?"

Gary made a click with his mouth, avoiding her aggressive eye contact. The way she eyed him made his stomach churn. The sound of heels resonated in his mind as she made her way closer. "What do you want, Lo?"

"Lo?" She cackled at this. Sauntering right up to him. Swinging her hips as she did so. "Giving me pet names now? Gary Smith, the psycho, giving me a nickname? I'm absolutely honored."

"Fine. Stupid bitch rolls off the tongue much better anyways." He grumbled out. Eyes finally meeting hers. She grinned at this. Her smile was different than Ms. Phillips. The art teacher's was warm. Lola's was... Insidious.

She snatched the towel from around his neck and began to scrub the top of his head. First very lovingly and then aggressively. "Can't a girl visit her half dressed, dripping wet boy toy and tell him how well he did?"

Gary let out a hiss. Her long nails pressing into the towel as it dug into his scalp. "Usually there are no girls in the boy's locker room. You could have waited, you know?"

"Oh Gary, Gary, what a bad boy. Such a wild card. But what you don't know," with a few quick motions, she had the towel around the back of his neck, forcing him to get even closer. "Is that I am the wild card. Try to remember that, baby boy."

His cheek pressed against her midsection. The stupid crop top pressing against his forehead. Her stomach warm. Smooth. The smell of fancy lotions and cherries pressing into his nose. Gary though about biting her stomach. Giving her a piercing with his incisor. He said under his breath. "You bitch."

She either didn't hear him. Or she didn't care.

"Are you feeling better? Still sick to your stomach. You know, I was almost worried about you. Almost." She didn't give him a moment to answer. "I thought I broke you. But then you join swim team? That's just odd."

It seemed like everything in Gary's world stopped.

What?

A very panicked feeling coursed through his veins as he stood. Lola barely had enough time to back up so the top of his head wouldn't slam into her jaw. He didn't think about that. His heart pounding. Hell, he could feel it beating in his forehead. "...what did you just say?"

"What's the matter?" Lola said, tilting her head. "What did I say?"

"Did you sign me up for swimming?" Gary said, demandingly. "Tell me you did."

When she didn't say anything he gripped her shoulders and started to shake her back and forth. Pleading eyes meeting deadpanned ones. "Uh, no."

"I got a speedo. A fucking speedo. A box inside my door. Someone was in my room last night." Gary's hands leaving her shoulders as he paced. "Someone was in my room. My room!"

It was all very reminiscent of the paranoia last year. Everyone was a suspect. An itching sensation. Something was wrong. He knew it was wrong.

A Cheshire smile spread across Lola's features. A red claw tapping on her chin. "You have a stalker, too? How exciting. And a speedo. You must have gotten someone really hot and bothered to see you in that at tryouts. You'll have to show me sometime with your curtains closed."

"How can you laugh and joke around about this? Someone left me a note. It was signed with your name. Your name Lola."

Her eyebrows furrowed. Her attitude shifting. Her smile melted. "So? Most people get obsessed with people like you. You're dangerous. A bad boy. Every innocent girl is going to crush about you. Get over it already!" She was shouting at him. Her voice like nails.

There was a quick moment of silence before her attitude shifted back into that stupidly sweet one.

Lola closed the gap between the two, encroaching on his bubble. She put her arms around his shoulders, lips pressed against his ear. "Maybe you give these innocent girls wet dreams about how big and bad you are, Gary. I know I can't help it."

He didn't even hear what Lola had said. Too concentrated on his safe room being intruded on.  
His face was hot with anger. All he could think about was someone hovering over him while he slept. Paranoia. Fear. Someone who would try to killing him. Touching him while he slept.

"Hey," lips found themselves on his. Just for a moment. A peck. "I'm going out on a little date tonight. With Algernon. We're going to study really hard at In and Out Motel. I'll see you around."

Her hands cupped his face. When he was done thinking, his eyes found hers and his hands found her wrists. Gary clenched them, throwing them aside. He said through his teeth, "Then go fuck pee pants and get out of my face."

He meant that. Truly.

Lola swiftly made her way to the entrance of the boy's locker room. "I will! See you round, lover boy!"

When she was gone and out of view, he scrubbed his lips with the back of his hand. Gary stared at the smudge. The red staring back at him. He brought the smear to his lips. Tongue sticking out as he drug it against the wax.

...It tasted empty.

Fucking bitch.

Gary changed out of his Bullworth trunks and into his uniform. Feeling absolutely soggy.  
It was one of the longest walks to the boys dorm. Eyes peeking over his shoulder. Hoping that nobody would tail him. But there were always people behind him. They were all plotting against him. He knew it.  
He just didn't have proof.

When he got into the dorm. He practically ran into his room. Giving a second glance at Petey who had tried to approach him as he slammed it shut in his face.

Checking under his bed. In his closet. Just about every nook and cranny where nobody could possibly contort themselves to fit. But Gary was convinced they could fit. They could.

There was someone in his room.


	17. Sex Acts

It felt like a sleepless night. Still damp from swimming. Gary was sat up in his bed. An awful feeling in his stomach. Not like how Lola made him feel but... like he was being watched. Someone was watching him. Somewhere. He let out a shaky sigh. Eyes flickering to the meds sitting on top of his desk. With little hesitating, Gary jumped to his feet. He snatched them up and emptied out two capsules and swallowed them.

He was good at swallowing pills dry. It was a talent. Gary grimaced. The taste was a mix between ear wax and vomit.

He threw himself back in bed. Not knowing why exactly he took them. Maybe to stop the crawling suspicion. The paranoia. Each bump and each creek was someone in the shadows.

And then, for some reason, he thought back to Lola. Pee pants. Why him? She was going to fuck him. Why? He grimaced. He didn't care. He probably would piss himself before he'd even get hard.

Still, it pissed him off.

Gary left the soiled sanctity of his room. His body leading him to the water fountain to wet his mouth of the disgusting taste. He twisted the knob and the taste started to be washed away. Thankfully.

He heard a squeal. A feminine squeal.

He stopped mid sip, standing up straight. Maybe it was a rat? Then the sound happened again. He tried to find the noise.

That wasn't a rat.

Gary followed the sound to Jimmy's door. Hearing another moan that sounded more like a boy's.

The keyhole to his room was pouring out light. And against his better judgement, Gary bent down, peering through it.

Within a dimly lit room. There were two bodies. Seated on the side of Jimmy's bed.

Zoe was there. In Jimmy's room. Their hands exploring each other. Lips colliding with purpose.

Fucking hell. Gary thought to himself, resuming his peeping through the keyhole. It was garbage that pre-teens and sad old women watched on their romantic sit-coms and soap operas.

It was really too pathetic.

He wanted to pull away and stop watching. Gary didn't have to watch Jimmy and some slut of the week fuck.

But then again, not knowing about that kind of stuff could end up hurting his chances of getting in with the cliques again.

He pondered. He thought about how easy it could be to be "boyfriended" into a clique, just find a thirsty whore, play whatever flavor of boy-toy they're looking for, and then poison the group from the inside. Like... like...

Like Lola.

While maybe not his preferred method of school domination, Gary decided that it'd be best to know about this screwing shit, even as a last resort if he needed it.

But he really, really didn't want to resort to that.

Knowing that he may be here for a while, he gulped and wiped his brow in repulsion and contemplative fatigue.

Jimmy's hands moved from Zoe's uncovered chest down past her waist to her ass. He suddenly squeezed it and pulled her ever so closer to him, surprising Zoe enough to have her let out a delighted moan. Her arms found their way across the back of Jimmy's neck, so that she could pull him in deeper for each kiss.

The sounds they made became more 'passionate' as time went on.

Disgusting.

Just watching the two idiots get ready to fuck like animals had already started to make him sick, and to think that actual people liked to watch that kind of filth, disgusting.

Zoe parted the kiss, for a moment, hissing as she did so. "Goddamn it, Jimmy, did you get a condom?" His hands still grabbing, squeezing and exploring. "You keep distracting me. You're not doing it raw."

He mumbled something between her neck and collarbone. When she opened her mouth again to protest, he bit her. Zoe shoved him off her and back onto the bed, flat on his back.

"What the hell was that?" She barked at him, "Were you trying to be some kind of vampire, Count Prick-ula!"

"Sorry babe." He propped himself up on the bed, giving her a mischievous yet apologetic look. "I tried to do one of those love bites, sorry you couldn't appreciate it." The corners of his mouth curling upwards into a grin.

"Real sexy asshat." She jabbed back playfully. "Hurry your ass up and find that fucking thing, otherwise the only thing you'll be getting from me is a 'love' kick straight up your ass."

Jimmy let out a groan, getting to his feet and going through drawers. His method was grab and toss. Making a bigger mess of his already messy room. "Man, the things I put up with." Jimmy said under his breath.

Gary's eye trailed down to the little man standing in attendance in Jimmy's underwear. Little. Tiny. Pathetic. That was his dick. Man, he felt sorry for every girl he laid out.  
He was disgusted. Beyond disgusted. Seeing more of Jimmy than he wanted to see.

Gary's attention went to Zoe as she lowered her skirt. Her body was trim. Muscular even. Covered in the occasional bruise. But her skin looked soft. And the way her auburn hair fell in front of her face reminded him of... well, you know who.

"Here we go! Found one." Jimmy triumphantly exclaimed, the small and shiny plastic package in hand.

And unimpressed Zoe gave little time for fanfare however. "Well, it's about damn time you found one!" she scoffed, "I figured I'd be as old and dried up as Edna's food before you found one."

It seemed she was taking delight in her opportunity to jab back at him.

Jimmy turned to her, triumphant smile  
still plastered to his smug face. Apparently too stupid, not letting her comments dampen his mood. He quickly began undressing, first his school vest, then his undershirt, then to his underwear. He barely pulled down his waistband when Zoe called out to him.

"Slow down baby, going a bit fast aren't ya?" Zoe said, now sitting on the side of the bed nearest to him. She began, teasingly. "Since my big strong man worked so hard to find that prize, you must be all tired."

Zoe patted the side of the bed. He sat there. Like a nervous child. She bent between his legs. Her fingers fumbling with the opening of his underwear. It was hard to see his cock. Thank god. And he was glad about that. "Maybe I could help a bit with that, hm? What do you say?"

Gary heard a voice that didn't belong to either Zoe or Jimmy. "Uh, G-Gary?"  
He felt himself jump at least a foot up. Almost slamming his head on the doorknob. Gary turned his head to the voice.

Panicked as he saw a sleepy. Petey rubbing his eyes. "What are you doing by Jimmy's door?"

"Petey! Don't do that!" He hissed in a whisper. "It's none of your business!"

He must have been so tired, he really didn't care about getting his ass beaten.

"Whatever, Gary. It's too early for this. Are they still at it? Gosh, that's so gross."

A hand reached out and knocked on Jimmy's door.

"What the fuck was that?!" Jimmy shouted. Gary could hear it through the door.

Gary covered Petey's mouth, dragging him into the common room. Jimmy opened his door. Boner fully visible. Condom in hand. Looking all around.

"What the fuck Petey?! Do you have a death wish?" Gary growled at the small boy. "Great time to find your balls!"

"It's a noise complaint. I'm really, really tired."

Footsteps lead into the common room and not knowing what to do, Gary forgave himself for what he would do next. He pressed into Petey and the wall. Causing him to yelp. Gary was going to regret this. But it was the only thing he could come up with

Their lips connecting. And for some reason Petey was a willing mouth.

"What the fuck? Gary? Pete?"

Gary smirked into his lips as he pulled away from the small boy. Stomach gurgling and groaning at the mere touch to Petey's lips.

Pete practically melted. His lip quivered. "Oh... oh, wow." It was all he could say. He repeated 'wow' and sunk into the wall.

"What the hell are you guys doing?"

"I could ask you the same thing, pal. Nice cock."


	18. Caligula's Escape

Though Gary had just barely escaped getting the shit kicked out him for "observing" Jimmy and Zoe, he wondered if his current fate was any better than that. He knew that Jimmy would never let him live that fiasco down, not for a single damned moment. And as if that wasn't already awful enough, he'd have to bleach his mouth for the next few years to purge himself of that vile taste. Whether it be a few days or few years, every time he'd lick his lips, every single fucking time, he'd be brought back to the taste of Petey's mouth and the gut-wrenching sick feeling he felt now. The taste of cheap energy drinks, chewed pencils, unbrushed teeth, and most of all, inferiority. Fucking repulsive.

But just when he thought things couldn't get any worse they just had to. More and more notes had started pouring though under his door. The normal stream of stupid and pointless letters from other students were but drops of rain in a bucket compared to what he got now. Gary didn't bother reading them, but he knew all too well what was in them, thanks to Jimmy's gaping loud mouth.

He didn't know what to do with them, there were just too damn many. All he could do was stuff them under his bed in the futile hope that they'd crumple up and erase themselves from his memory.

As if he could physically repress it.

The oppressive air of ever-prying eyes only became worse with this new influx of attention. No matter where he was on campus, or whatever he'd be doing, he couldn't help feeling like there were eyes on him, hundreds or thousands of them, watching him like a bug under a microscope. Scanning his every movement. His every thought. Not even his own room was safe anymore, the panes from which he once viewed his prospective empire had now turned inward, the masses he was meant to rule over now closing in around him.  
The council slowly turning to Caesar before plunging their daggers into him. His sanctuary had been defiled.  
He started to leave campus more often, only returning for his classes. Tired of everyone there. Tired of sleeping in a room full of eyes.

He had managed to steal a metal bat from the gym. It made him feel safer. He would brandish the bat in his room. Gary would imagine the shadowy figure at his feet after he bashed the side of his head in. And he'd do it over and over again. Until his eyes popped out. Until he could peek no longer.  
Until blood splattered everywhere and the eyes were destroyed.

He didn't feel on top as he did a few weeks ago.

But...

Even Caligula had his downs, he killed off his family. But it was justified. The people wanted to dethrone him. They wanted him dead. Kill or be killed.

Dog eat dog world.

But Caligula was no mortal man. He was a god. And without a thought he would execute the elite.

Oderint, dum metuant.  
Let them hate, so long as they fear.

But Gary felt like he feared what people might do.

That day in particular, he couldn't take the sick feeling of eyes on him on campus. He decided to take a vacation away. A comfortable place. A bench on the docks. The bench was his own island of Capri.

If Gary could, he'd sleep on the streets like a bum. He was starting to feel like one. Here he was. Sleeping on a bench.

A bitter cold woke him. His eyes snapped open. Gary sat up, unsteadily as he did so. He must have fallen asleep again. It was easy to when his room had become a peep show for some creep. The sun's rays poured down on him, along with the leaves that had gathered on the dock. He took a moment to soak in the ocean breeze. The cold air rattling him. He should have worn a jacket. He opened his, still cold, can of Beam Cola. No eyes were here.  
Hopefully.

He grit his teeth when reality set in. The treatment with Dr. Bambillo was tomorrow. It had really already been two weeks.

Doctors. They weren't smart. All liars and cheats perpetuating a business where unstable people take advice from another unstable individual with a degree.

He remembered breaking into the doctor's office back at Happy Volts. Remembering getting that key off a townie in exchange for meds. Remembering the office of the kind doctor and sneaking inside, late one night. Remembering the massive manila folder that had his name so neatly written. Remembering all the dirty lies. All the scribbles of nonsense. The diagnoses were nothing but made up self projections from that excuse for a doctor! He was so stupid. Such a moron!

That doctor didn't know him. Didn't know who he really was.

The new psychiatrist would be none different. Besides, he had seen this one once before.

The gulls gathered around him and that wooden bench. Knowing fully that Gary had food. Gary opened the bag of chips reluctantly. Tossing one at a bird. They would fight in a flurry of feathers and peck each other until one walked away the winner.  
Taking the chip and waddling away with it's clumsy feet.

"Stupid birds." Gary said to himself.

His mind wandered.

The notes. The eyes. The eyes that would watch him from the dark. Someone was plotting. They would ruin everything!

Gary didn't recognize the person behind him. But he could sense it. He didn't know who it was but it should have been obvious.

"Gary." He could feel her smile radiating from behind him. "Gary Smith? Should I get you a newspaper and a bottle of booze now?"

He turned his head, seeing a pink sweater and leather, slanted eyes and puffy red lips. Lola. Of course. She leaned down, planting an oily kiss on his cheek. "Haven't seen you around lately. Word at school is that you got hospitalized again. And yet, here you are. It's fate between us, you know?"

He pursed his lips.

"Where have you been? Why are you running away? Gary doesn't run away."

Maybe she was right.

His nose and eyebrows scrunched up. Gary opened his mouth. And nothing came out. He grumbled at this turning back to the gulls.

However, when he didn't say anything, she didn't get her reaction she so desperately wanted. So, Lola took a seat beside him, ready to harass him endlessly, he figured.

While Gary threw the salty snacks at birds. She fumbled with a cigarette behind her ear. Lola plopped it between her lips. Speaking between the filter.  
"Feeding the birds? Isn't that what grannies do in their spare time? Now you're an old hobo granny."

"If you don't want to sit here then don't, Lola." Gary found the strength to say that. It was exhausting to speak. Especially to her.

Lola's lip rose in partial disgust. Teeth clenching the cigarette. A hand reached out and squeezed his cheek. "Why are you being so pouty? First you run off to sleep on benches, then you call me 'Lola' and not 'Lo' and now you're being so harsh to me. Is that anyway to treat a lady?"

The way she talked down to him mixed with the pinching... it was so infantile. She couldn't have just asked him, Lola had to put her own spin on it. "Why did you come looking for me?"

"As I said, it was fate baby."

He crunched the bag between his fingers. Feeling his breath hitch. "Why don't you cram your fate and bother someone else. I'm second rate to you. I'm boring. If you'd rather spend your time with worthless peons, then go!"

With the burst of anger and tension, even the gulls flew away. Noisy as they did so.

"Oh, baby. Is that what you think?"

"Don't 'oh baby' me!" Gary stood, tensing as he did so. Yelling loudly. "I didn't ask for you to follow me around. You keep trying to get close to me. Quit it! Go hang out with someone else. I'm always second best with you."

Lola watched on with amusement glistening in her eyes. She said with that fake, oh so innocent voice. "Oh, is this because of little Algie?"

"No."

"It is. You can't bullshit a bullshitter."

"You don't know what you're talking about, moron." He spat.

"I think I do."

Gary's fists kept clenching and unclenching painfully. He wanted to make her disappear. She was a distraction. A stupid bitch with too much free time on her hands. Gary wanted all the notoriety she would give. But at this moment, she was a thorn. And she kept pricking him. "You don't know anything about me."

"I don't have to." Lola said with a sly smile. Rising to her feet, she closed the gap and clung onto his arm tightly. "Let's go, just the two of us. Come on, Gary!"

"No."

"Uh, actually, your line is, 'of course, Lo' and you do what I say." Her eyebrows furrowed. Her bottom lip sticking out in moronic way.

"I'm not one of your boy toys you can just order around." Gary barked down at the woman holding onto his arm like he was some guy like Jimmy bringing one of his skanks out on the town. Gary ripped his arm away, but to no avail. Lola held firmly.

"Fine, let's get lunch. Your treat of course. I'll give you the attention you so desperately need."

Gary had enough. He shoved her face away from his bicep. Watching her stumble back from the unnecessary force. "I don't need your attention!"

"You don't need my attention?!" Lola practically laughed at the comment, steadying herself. Probably not wanting to fall off the dock and into the ocean below. "You're in love with me Gary. I'm all you think about. Face it, I validate your existence."

"Get over yourself! The whole reason I put up with you is because you keep holding Johnny Vincent over my head! You stole my book! You're nothing but a cheap whore. Something people can use and abuse and forget about later."

"You think people use me? I am Helen of Troy. People are enraptured by my looks. I'm beautiful. I'm perfect." Lola said, almost admiring herself out loud. "And because I'm so beautiful, people will fight over me. They'll kill for me. They'll do whatever I say. Just like you, Gary."

"You're delusional!"

"So are you Gary. We make a good team, don't you think?"

He caught himself. His face probably turning a shade of red. The way she said it only made him yell out. And his voice broke as he did so. "Y-you're such a moron!"

Lola motioned to him. The tension disappearing. The heavy air light again. She smiled brightly. "I'm starving. And I'm not asking this time. We're going out for lunch and you're going to treat me."  
…

Why did he even agree to this?

Gary held onto the suicidal motorist as she whizzed around cars and pedestrians trying to cross the road. Gary shivered into her. The crisp October already giving him hell with how unforgivingly cold it was.  
When Lola started to slow down, he was able to open his eyes. He peered up to a familiar fast food restaurant. Gary murmured about it being a death trap, as she came to a stop. Legs branching out as she did so. Removing her helmet and turning off the Vespa.

Burgers. A cleverly named fast food joint. It was most likely crawling with cockroaches. And even more infested with pimple popping preteens. He disliked the place even more because of the ugly foam fry mascot heads. But why fries? The place was called Burgers. It should have been a burger hats. God.

He hated Burgers.

After going through a long process of going inside. Lola mentally narrowing down what she wanted. And her constant ho-humming about getting a burger or fries, all the while a teen behind the counter stood dead eyed. Lola finally made up her mind and settled for a shake. Extra cherries. Typical. Gary had just wanted the fries. Why? Because he decided to skip out on fried pimple fat and insect meat.

Gary had chosen the spot to sit. The far back booth. Wanting to be hidden from the world. He didn't want to be seen with her. She was a sore that he kept scratching. Like an ugly scab that you would keep picking and it would get gummy with blood. Lola was an itch he kept digging into.

Lola perched her head in her hands. Eyes staring down Gary. Like a predator. He couldn't have been bothered, this time anyways. Gary's mind preoccupied. But when his eyes met hers, he couldn't look into hers for long.

Why?

Why was she so intimidating?

The woman absentmindedly said aloud. "Julius Caesar, huh? Why are you reading war books anyways? Afraid you might get stabbed?"

"I like Rome." Gary said simply.

Lola let out an obnoxious snort at that. "You must like all the sex and orgies too, right?"

"That was their downfall. They were slaves to their inhibitions. I liked the tactical mentality. The killing and the conquering!" Gary corrected her. Angrily as he did so. Eyeing her pleased face with disgust. "You like Greek mythology. That is way worse than Rome's history."

"No it isn't!"

"Zeus fucked someone as a goose, Lola. That's disgusting." He snarked. "But, knowing you you're probably into that sort of thing."

The table rattled as a foot rammed right into his shin. Gary grasped the sides of it. Smothering a yip of pain into his bit lip.

"Excuse me, but I didn't quite hear you. You'll have to speak up." She said with a poisonous hiss.

"...bitch."

The front door chimed and three teens stepped inside the small establishment. Gary immediately ducked down. Swallowing roughly. Lola didn't really care about Gary ducking half way under the table. Lola turned back. Probably spotting the three. "Hiding from your friends? They're coming this way." Lola whispered down to him. "Ready or not, here they come."

Gary covered his face as footsteps came closer and closer.

Fuck.

He wanted to run.

But he was stuck in that fucking booth with her.

What would Jimmy say? Fuck. Fuck!

"Well if it isn't the sexually confused sociopath." That stupid voice broke the uncomfortable waiting. Lola was right, unfortunately.

Gary emerged from his hands. A scowl painting his face.

"Excuse me? That insult coming from you? Please. If anyone is insecure about their sexuality it's you, Hopkins." Gary barked back. "Don't act like we all haven't seen you sucking face with every boy from every clique."

"I heard you used tongue on poor Pete." Zoe leaned down to Gary. Inches away as she flicked her tongue out. Just to emphasize. "You didn't even buy him dinner! What a lazy bum."

Petey stood behind the two troublemakers. Rubbing his hands together. Eyes glued to the floor. Like a nervous child. "Zoe, I don't remember him doing that-" Pete stammered before he was so rudely cut off.

Lola gave Gary a look. Probably wondering what they were talking about. Half amused but half annoyed. Her hair curtained towards the three. Not even attempting to look at them.

Gary could barely contain himself. All he needed was Lola torturing him about Petey too. "You're so pathetic Jimmy. At least I don't juggle tonsils with anyone willing to give me the time of day."

"Gary, you're really not the type to makeout with someone. And Petey of all people? You give Pete a hard time for playing on the same team. I mean, you call him all those nasty things."

"Hey, I'm not gay!" Petey blurted out. "Just because I haven't found the right girl yet, Jimmy. Jeez! Why are you two throwing me under the bus?"

Gary's attention shifted from Jimmy then to Pete. His voice raising. "I'd have more respect for femme-boy here if he would step up, come out of the closet and stop denying it for once. Instead he pisses his pants, scared of what people might think and pretends to be straight. How pathetic."

Davis, one of the hulking bullies, cut through the three. Slicing through the tension. Tray in hand. Stupid foam fries branching out from his head like a goddamn cancerous growth. He set the tray with Lola's precious milkshake and grease dripping fries in front of the two. Davis was unusually quiet. Looking at Petey and then Jimmy before shuffling off. Like he was star struck or some shit.

Idiot.

Pimple headed idiot.

Lola's hand reached for her shake. And eyes all fell to Lola. She was seemingly invisible to all three of them. She finally turned her head slightly. Glaring at the ginger. "Excuse me. It's rude to stare. What do you need from me, Jimmy?"

"Nothing from you. Why are you hanging out with this slut anyways,  
Gary?" Jimmy gestured to Lola and spoke about her like she didn't exist. "First you're kissing Pete and now you're hanging out with Lola? Are you put up to something? What's going on?"

"Zoe, you need to have him put on a better leash." Lola said simply. As if the offensive comment was a suggestion to a pet owner. "Gary is a friend, nothing more. We went out for lunch since he's taken up sleeping on benches. It's my duty as a good Samaritan to feed the homeless."

"Benches? Like some hobo?" Jimmy practically cried. "Gary, are you okay man? You got a dorm. You can't be sleeping on the streets."

Gary's hands slammed down on the table. "God, would you just shut up already! Quit acting like you care, Jimmy! You're just waiting for me to slip up."

Eyes following the two talking, or rather shouting at each other, Lola stuck the cherry between her lips, plucking it off the stem with her mouth. Chewing it slowly. Eye shutting. Difficult to read.

"Whoa. Gary, man. What's your problem? Relax." Jimmy stated.

"Don't tell me what to do!"

"Hey," Lola started. "I wanted to go out for lunch. And all your doing is yelling like a goddamn madman and making a scene! Sit down and shut up."

At that moment, she sounded like a mother. Maybe not like Gary's own mother but… she sounded as though she were scolding a child. Maybe she thought of Gary like a child? It bothered him.

"As for you three, don't you misfits have somewhere to go or some pretending to do? Why don't you play hall monitor or traffic guard or something?"

"Excuse me? Misfits?" Zoe questioned, pipping up.

"That's right. And if you want that excuse for a haircut to match your face you'll get out of mine." Lola snapped back.

It had seemed time had stopped. Jimmy was tense at this. His face white at the remark.

Zoe was known to be even a bigger hothead than Jimmy. Constantly getting into confrontations.

"Did I strike a nerve?" Lola laughed at the fierce look Zoe gave her. Challenging her.

With one quick movement, Zoe took the woman's drink and it whizzed right passed Lola. Connecting with the wall as it splattered in all directions. Lola stood fast. Her leather jacket painted in specs of pink sweetness.

Before Gary knew it, Jimmy was holding back a furious Zoe. Her face contorted with malice and rage. Lola just stood there. As if baiting her.

"You're a stupid bitch, you know that Lola? You like to hide behind Johnny, but one of these days he's gonna drop you. And you'll be touchable. And I'll beat your ass."


	19. War Paint

Another day, another passing daydream.

They would just fly by Gary. He didn't really mind.

His plans would come into fruition. Hopefully.

Gary strode into the psychiatrist office with ease. There was no hint of embarrassment. Gary owned who he was. Of course, completely sane. His wires were wired correctly. He was sure, Jimmy or Petey would be red. Ashamed. And Zoe? Fuck, she needed the therapy.

The lay of the land familiar to him. He checked in with the secretary. Attention darting to familiar slanted eyes. Gary looked away. And when he dared to look back... he noticed the brown pools becoming rounder. Softer. Gary just thought he was tired. Acting as if everyone reminded him of… you know who.

He checked in. But not without some lip from the secretary for being late.  
He passed Damon from the football team, who was known for being a complete psycho, and planting himself in a seat beside him. His eyes glued to Gary the entire time. Gary picked up a magazine. The whole atmosphere of the waiting room was excruciating. The Muzak echoing in the room the secretary busy with paper work, pen scraping on paper. Damon's leg bouncing. It was an insufferably loud silence. It went on for what felt like forever until he was called.

A VIP ticket into the office of the great Dr. Bambillo.

He was known for being unprofessional. Believed in the practices of old.

Shocks. Containment. Medicine. Abuse.

Torture.

He sunk into the leather couch. Closing his eyes. Personality shifting. Playing the part of a victim. Melting into his role. Eyes opening. A new person. The Gary that was in the asylum. The Gary that acted so disgusting... but lies set him free.  
And they would do so again.

Clinically delusional? Maybe Bambillo. Not him. Not Gary.  
...

He got out with sanity in check. At least he didn't have to see him for another two weeks.

Home sweet home, it was not. But he was always drawn back to Bullworth. Like a knot he simply could not cut. He couldn't bare to separate himself from it. It needed guidance. It needed a leader. It needed Gary.

And the students of Bullworth needed him.

It was all quite simple.

He had to return to his dorm. After the incident at Burgers, he knew it was time to return. Jimmy and Petey would soon make up more lies, except now he was a homo hobo.

Fucking twits.

Back at Bullworth, Gary placed a hand on his neck, stretching. The whole thing making him stressed. Maybe he should have picked up theater. He was really good at lying. Maybe not as good as Lola but damn, did he put effort in it. Strolling down the boy's dorm with new prescription in hand. He was probably going to toss it later. He didn't need it after all. He was fine. One bottle of pills was enough. Two was one too many.

He could always try to sell it. But, there was no one to do favors for an anti-psychotics… were there?

Probably not.

At the end of the hall of the boy's dorm, there was Gary's room. And at that moment, there was someone knelt down at the door. Gary's face felt red. Red with wrath. Knowing who it was. Exactly who it was.  
Constantinos.

What the hell was he doing at his room that time of day? Maybe dropping off one of those stupid letters, or maybe... maybe... Maybe that moron was trying to get a free peep show out of him. Of all the lunatics who he thought were stalking him, it just had to be this dumbass. Gary's pace quickly escalated from a jog to a full on run towards Constantinos.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" Gary spat venomously, murderous intent in his voice.

Constantinos turned his head back to face the speaker and was met with the frightening image of that Smith psycho charging towards him. Impulsively he tried to rise to his feet and take off, but he stumbled and fell to his hands and knees, scrambling away as fast as one could. But it would be futile, as the furious matador made his lethal charge on the helpless bull, kneeing him in the side and sending him sliding into the wall.

Constantinos wailed as he thudded against the wall. Before the boy had a moment to recover, Gary's hands gripped his sweater, dragging him to his feet. Panicked eyes meeting Gary's fiery ones. Constantinos' lip quivered, "O-oh, hey Gary! I suppose I should, jump out of your way, shouldn't I?"

He had tried to say the line with some humor but it just sounded angry.

"Hold on. I'll let you scurry off like the rat you are after you tell me what you were doing hanging outside my dorm room." he growled through grit teeth.

"I w-was just checking up on you. No one's seen you on campus lately, so the s-swim team had me come see where you were." Constantinos stammered out, still catching his breath.

"Don't bullshit me Constantinos!" Gary grunted, pushing him harder up against the wall "No way those uppity assholes would give a damn about what I was up to."

Nervous and cornered, the bull of Bullworth bleated out."I'm an innocent bystander to it all! I was just-" He kvetched. "Please don't hurt me, I-I'll write about you in the school paper if you do!"

"Listen, you poor excuse for excrement, tell me what you're doing under my door!" Gary said frostily. Constantinos' placed his hands in front of his face. Inside his left hand was a crumpled note. He noticed it right away, snatching it from his palm. Constantinos practically threw himself onto Gary. Scared. Probably. With a quick elbow to the ribs, Constantinos cowered.

Gary opened the letter with little hesitation. Right away, he noticed the handwriting. It was like… Lola's. Very curly. Cutesy. Disgusting. Even the red lip print making his stomach drop.

"I was doing it for Lola!" Constantinos admitted, "I'm sorry!"

"Lola put you up to this?"

"I didn't have a choice! Sh-she told me that if I helped her, she'd set me up with Pinky-"

"You horny piece of shit." He spat.

The sight of her was enough to bring a man to wild thoughts and deeds, just her face enough to launch a thousand ships.

Gary crumpled up the letter in in his hand. Even Costantinos' lips were smeared and faded with the red mark.

Gary entered his room without another word, closing the door on Constantinos. Leaving him with more questions than answers.

He left as soon as he entered. Slamming his door shut and leaving Constantinos standing. He called out to Gary, "So that- that means you're not going to kill me?"

"I'm surprised you haven't killed yourself, you worthless waste of flesh!"

Gary made it outside. Somehow without strangling someone. Still brimming with ire. Making his way to the lattice outside the girls dorm. Just like old times, he told himself. The boy climbed the rickety old thing. Reaching the window and popping it open with a quick bump from underneath.

He knew what he wanted to do. That bitch.

He entered the attic. Feet light as a cat as he scurried. Dust and cobwebs layering the walls and ceiling. Unused. He was in, so far. Lola's room. That wouldn't have been too hard to find.

He descended the attic stairs to the second floor. He hid behind the door frame, peeking out. Eerily quiet. School was in session after all. Ms. Peabody. That old spinster. Maybe she was gone. But that was a hopeful thought.

Most likely still roaming the halls.

Conveniently, each room had a sign with their individual names on it. Effortless.

As Lola would say, it was fate.

He found her room easily. The only room with that same cutesy writing. Right next to Pinky and Mandy, though. Ouch.

What a privilege, Beatrice had her room on the other side of Mandy. Lola and Beatrice were really lucky. That had to suck. For both of them. He wouldn't know how he would have handled those two being his neighbors.

Cheerleaders from hell.

He cracked open the door, making sure no one was inside and shut it behind him as silently as he possibly could. Lola's room was almost how he had imagined it. Like the rest of the girl's dorm it was very pink. Sanitary. Orderly. Disgusting. But hers was a completely disaster. Order but disorder.

Her wardrobe was left ajar. Clothes piling up on her bed. Notes scattered.

She was probably Ms. Peabody's favorite girl in the whole dorm. Knowing she was all about cleanliness.

Gary took in the details. Looking for something discriminating hiding in plain sight. Gary placed his fingers on the book shelf near him, dragging them across it. A line of books on a bookshelf. All looking untouched. As if they were provided to the students. No way he could see Lola reading. And with a quick look-through of books, he spotted a very familiar book. His book. _Caesar's__ Gallic War. _He was tempted to take it back. But he knew he shouldn't have. She would have noticed for sure. Why would someone take that book but him? It gave him away. He wondered if she had a diary.

Wandering around the room. Fingers brushing on her private things. Her sanctuary. Her sanctity. Being defiled like his. Payback. It's what he really wanted after all.

From the corner of his eye, he saw it. A vanity. What was a desk, anyways. A mirror taking up the entirety of the desk. Messy with makeup products and pieces of toilet paper covered in makeup. From the dust from powder and the spillage of foundation, she was much more than messy. Maybe organized in her eyes.

He wondered how often she would sit in front of the mirror. Wasting time. Brushing her hair or doing her face up.

He plucked up a stray lipstick. Taking off the lid and unscrewing it. The red wax tempting him. Licking his lips. He looked to his reflection and grinned. As if it gave him an idea. He began to write on the mirror.

'_Johnny doesn't deserve a TRAMP like you. You're scum. Worthless. Trashy. Ugly. __And fat.__ With love, the cheerleaders_'

Gary admired his handwork. Eye darting to his reflection one last time. He traced his lips with the wax. His pale, pink lips were now a fire engine red. He got close to his reflection and puckered. Kissing himself. The kiss mark. It was always her signature. Now it was his. Figuring it would be the creme de la creme.

He looked at the crushed war paint sympathetically. The sound of the bell from the main building drew him from his thoughts as he pocketed the red lipstick for himself.

Gary strode out of Lola's room with ease. There was no hint of embarrassment. Gary owned who he was.


	20. Bona Fide

The pumpkins, they mocked Gary as he walked with Petey and Jimmy. Their hollow smiles and eyes. Laughing at him. Following his every movement.

Halloween was upon Bullworth.

Gary thought about Lola and Constantinos. That he had most likely put the swimming thong in his room. Constantinos could have put that note in his room the first time. Paranoia spiking. Constantinos was near the tryout board after that speedo incident... it all made sense.

The notes... were most of them from Lola herself or had she had others write them for her? It made him question... things he didn't want to question.

Target number one was now Lola.

She had to pay.

He never had thought of doing that but... taking over the school had to wait.

Jimmy, Pete and Gary parked next to a wall after meandering around. Watching a mob of kids wander from their classes and a few darting to make it from one class to another. Gary unpeeled his fruit. A banana. When was the last time he ate? He had a beam Cola yesterday. But that wasn't a food group.

Cola was a sweet.

He stood with his 'friends' watching the pitiful fountain of Bullworth spurt an inconsistent amount of water. The fountain was known to be part piss, part water. Leaves layered the bottom. Alge coating the top. It was disgusting. An eyesore.

Gary bit into the banana which made Jimmy cackle. "Enjoying that banana? Practicing are we?"

A phallic joke.

"No." Gary chewed his banana with much frustration. The redhead had bravado, he gave him that. Fucker. He swallowed the fruit, smacking as he opened his mouth. "If that's what you do to your bananas. Maybe you should get one. I'm pretty sure Zoe would appreciate the practice when you're on your knees, sucking her dick. Friend."

"What?!" Jimmy cursed as Petey got in the middle of the two. Practically fighting the two back from killing each other.

"Gosh! Get a room you two!" Petey cried out. "Can't we just get along?"

"I'm just kidding, relax." Gary tossed Pete into Jimmy who promptly pushed Pete into the wall beside him. "Shouldn't you be off doing something with little Pete here?"

"Not for another few hours." Jimmy crossed his arms. Gritting his teeth. "Me and Petey have to sit at some stupid meeting with the class treasurer."

"It's not stupid, Jimmy! It's really important! We help decide activities and-"

"You know it's going to end in cutting out programs so those meatheads can play football! I say set the field on fire!" Gary interrupted Petey as he threw his banana peel in the fountain. Now with piss, water and potassium.

Lola. Looking at the fountain, he could relate it to her. See those come hither eyes cry. Wanted to hold her tell her everything was going to be okay, all the while masterminding her social demise.

The resentment in him got bigger and bigger, until he was ready to burst.

She was the source of the eyes. And the eyes were on him. And he wanted to smash every single one of them.

"What an eyesore." Jimmy blurted out. Staring at that stupid fountain.

Useless.

"Hey! Halloween is coming up! We can flood it with bubbles!" Petey said with excitement. "It might clean it up at the same time!" But, slowly shrinking up as the two boys began to glare at him. As if telling him to shut the fuck up.

"Alright. Speaking of Halloween, you boys got your costumes ready?" Gary said the next part condescendingly to the smaller boy, rather Jimmy. "Or should I pick them out again?"

"I think I can handle choosing my own costume this year, Gary." Petey said quite confidently.

Jimmy broke his hardass character to smirk at the smaller boy. "I don't know. I think you'll need some help Pete."

"Aw, but you and Gary'll make me look stupid! I just know it."

"Do you have one even picked out?" Gary grinned at Jimmy who looked just as sinister. The two boys seemingly growing horns and rubbing their hands sinisterly. Figuratively, of course.

"I mean, I-I have to think about it. I don't really think about Halloween like you two!"

Gary placed his hands behind his head. Springing himself off the wall. "You said it yourself, you don't think. It looks like you can't think for yourself. Leave it to me, femme boy!"

He strolled away from the two boys without so much as a goodbye. He passed the fountain. Passed Harrington house. Down to the Jock's domain.

The bell rang and another flood of people came rushing by. And both Jimmy and Petey were out of sight, he pulled out the lipstick from the night before. If Ms. Phillips were there... she would have said that bright red was all about making a bold statement.

That was true.

The red lipstick he had pilfered. It meant so much to him. If he removed the cap, he would see it crushed and red messy flakes breaking apart.

The red lipstick. It meant something. He wasn't sure what. But holding it made him feel better.

Looking at it before pocketing it.

He'd throw it under his bed later.

Dodgeball. The next class. He could at least get the anger out of his system. Tossing red rubber balls into the faces of those who deserved it. He could make it hurt.

...

Gary undressed and soon he was back in his uniform. He stolled to the mirror. Noticing the redness stuck into the valley and ridges in his lips. The evidence. He splashed water onto his face. Cheeks red. He slammed a fist into the mirror. Unhappy when it didn't shatter. Not even a crack. Not even a print. No evidence. Just sore knuckles. He took maticulous time making sure he looked presentable before heading into the hallway leading up to the gym.

"Ugh, Lola! I can't even!" Mandy's voice echoed. From where, he wasn't sure. She sounded more irate than usual. Gary peeked into the girl's locker room. Gary listened as two girls gossiped. Mandy wiggled out of her cheer uniform. Apparently a skirt too complex to pull over her hips. Wiggling and barking at Christy all the while. "-I can't believe her! Algernon! That nerd."

"Yeah, Lola's really mean to him. Cheating on him and stuff. You think she like, goes all the way?"

Gary ducked behind the wall beside the girl's locker room when Mandy had whipped around to Christy.

"I bet she's gone all the way with at least half the boys of the school just to make Johnny jealous. I wish he would dump her."

Gary's eyes found themselves back at the girls. Not in sexual interest. It was the gossip. Gossip was power. Rumors were currency.

Christy was always on the pulse of such things.

The voices in Gary's mind kept telling him to watch and listen. To learn.

"You and Johnny would make a really cool couple. You'd really get the jocks really mad at you though."

"After all the stuff Ted put me through, I'm over it! Don't I deserve the best?

Mandy was such an idiot. Self absorbed. None of the girls were innocent. Or any stereotypes a girl was supposed to be.

All the girls at Bullworth were tainted.

Christy attempted to button her shirt without missing a button. She must have done it three times before huffing. "You totally do! You think johhny would date you? I mean, he's devoted to Lola. Like, heart and soul. I heard he almost killed Gord."

"He could kill for me! I think I'm more attractive than Lola. Aren't I?" She gestured to her chest. "Maybe Lola's are bigger, but mine are definitely perkier... for sure."

"Oh, duh!"

"Lola's got Johnny all wound up the poor guy. He should forget about that tramp and try out for the football team! He could be quarterback! That earring and that smile. He even smells good, for someone so... greasy." She was so fucking sappy Gary held back a gag. "Maybe I should talk to Pinky too! She's boy smart!"

The voluptuous bimbo had a real big crush on the head greaseball, huh? Interesting.

"No! Pinky is awful! I really shouldn't be telling you about this, but I will. She has such daddy issues. Did you hear?"

"What?" Mandy's interests piqued.

"Pinky calls her boyfriends daddy!" Christy said excitedly.

"Ew, oh my god! Really? That's like the worst thing ever, I mean, can you believe it?!"

"I know right! But don't tell anyone, okay?"

It seemed as they ate each other alive behind each others backs.

Typical.

And somehow they were out of their cheer uniforms and into their Bullworth uniform. Gary made himself scares as he started down the hallway. Wouldn't want to be caught peeping again. No one to panic and kiss.

He could hear Mandy and Christy behind him. Footsteps becoming louder and louder.

"It was nice talking to you Christy. Anyways, I gotta go make Beatrice miserable. See you!"

"Oh yeah! I got to go tell Angie about Algernon!"

Sweat collected on his forehead as he began to approach the stairs leading to the gym when he heard Christy.

"Oh my gosh! There he goes! Gary smith. Somebody said Gary is actually a lot older than what he says. Like held back!"

"You sure that isn't just a rumor?" Gary twirled on his heel. "Well, well. If it isn't our school spirit. How are you doing after that messy breakup Mandy? I heard Tad cheated on you! What a shame. I wouldn't say that was very nice of him."

Mandy's jaw dropped. Stomping her foot as the words visibly cut her. "Shut up, nerd!"

"Is it, like true?" Christy jabbered. Approaching Gary like a crazed fan. "I wanna like, know!"

Gary backed away when the red head came bouncing up to him so peppy-like. He was used to people edging away slowly. "...What?"

"You're sleeping with her too!" Mandy butted in. She wasn't as peppy as the red head. Rather than skipping up to Gary she stomped up to him. Accusing him. "Come on, you can tell us!"

"As if. Why would I fuck Lola?"

"Who said anything about Lola?" Christy crossed her arms. A wide smirk spreading across her face.

"She's a slut. It was an assumption, Christy. Everyone knows who you're talking about before you even mention a name. She's a friendly hole who'll get fitted by anyone." He made a gesture with his fingers. Making a fucking motion.

Mandy flushed at the vulgarity. While Christy stood smiling at him. As if she knew. It made him uneasy.

"Ugh, Gary you're such a creep!" Mandy hissed.

"Yeah? All your brains went to your tits and ass." Gary said plainly.

"Excuse me?!"

"Listen, friend. If I had time to talk, I would. But you're boring me. Later."

Gary twirled again on his heel. Walking to the base of the stairs.

"You cant talk to me like that you- you nerd!" She stopped him by intercepting him. Her slightly shorter stature not as intimidating as Lola. Thank God.

"I can talk to you any way I please. Now get out of my way, moron!"

Mandy shoved him. Angered. Annoyed. In the perfect position. Right where he wanted her. "You can't just ignore me!"

"Don't put your hands on a friend, friend. Christy probably knows I was locked up for a whole summer! I might bite off something important!" Gary lashed out at the cheerleader. Making her feel smaller. Scared. Frightened.

Perfect.

"J-just admit it! Everyone knows you've been hanging around her! Just say it. You've fucked her."

"Me? Fucked her? We've had this discussion already. And I told you I'm very bored of it. But..." his head tilted. A glimmer of excitement danced in his eye. "Well speaking of Lola... I overheard something from the main man himself, Johnny."

"Oh my god what!" Christy was clamoring for more.

The damp smell. The rush of excitement. That made him feel alive. The puzzle coming together so well. The implantation. The manipulation. The words coming out so right. All the while her lipstick in his pocket. It was all so right.

"He likes you Mandy. Likes you a lot. He's planning on leaving Lola. Looking for just the right girl to occupy his heart wholly. You were mentioned."

"You're lying!" Mandy yelled. Her shrill voice bouncing off the walls.

"Just like I didn't hear you talking shit about Pinky? A fellow cheerleader. I'm pretty sure if I told her what you two said about her, she'd sue you and then beat you with her pom poms."

"Ugh, whatever, Gary." Mandy turned away from him. Arms still firmly crossed. But when she turned back to face him, her demeanor changed."Tell me what Johnny said."

Lola was going to pay. With her sanity. This time.

"Well..."

If it's a sin to tell a lie, Gary was going straight to hell.


	21. Halloween

Today was the day.

Halloween. The perfect set up to a perfect night. A never ending night. A night to remember.

A night where it was perfectly okay to cause a little mayhem.

He sewed what was left of his bed sheets. Spending half afternoon on the project. Wiping sweat from his brow and sipping a Beam Cola. Now, with a sheetless bed, and a completed costume. He admired it so as he slipped it on. The toga he wore so proudly. Home economics actually came in handy. He figured it was a pointless girly class.

He slipped on the sandals with excitement. And out of his room he went. Snickering all the while.

Outside he plucked the flowers from in front of the girl's dorm. He snatched the bulb, tossing the ugly colorful petals aside. He wanted one thing. Their stems. He tucked the leaves and thorns behind his ears. Feeling them pierce the soft spot behind his ears. Welcoming the pain.

His costume was more than complete.

What he didn't make, he bought. And being crafty was his forte... in more ways than one. And tonight he was what he wanted to be.

A menace.

Gary peered up at the heavens. Stars twinkling for him in that small town. He felt as though he was bigger than the sun, to be called Jupiter, just like the Ancient Roman king of the gods.

He reached his hand above. As if he could reach for a celestial body for himself.

But somethings were unattainable... for now.

Gary removed the salt bag from the storage room in the basement. Having the keys on him this time. He hummed a sweet symphony as he lugged the sack over his shoulder. Classes over and the prefects were nowhere in sight. Gary set the bag down on the field. He let out a breath he had been holding and pried open the bag with his hands. The smell of ocean air. Salt. Of course.

He dumped the salt over the perfectly manicured football field. Meticulously. Thoughtfully. His handwriting not so neat. But the grass would rot and die. Dry up brown.

A smudge of the Bullworth name. The lawn. How could those meatheads survive?!

He admired his work before abandoning the evidence and slipping back to where Petey and Jimmy were supposed to meet up. The fountain. Gary strode proudly. Walking each step, trite but true.

The three came into view.

Petey was dressed as what Gary called the fairy faggot. Finding the costume at Worn In. It didn't fit him, per say. It was legitimately a child's costume. It fit. But it pinched and made him look as if he were chubby. He held the fairy wand with a permanent scowl.

Very fitting, femme-boy.

Then his eyes met Jimmy and Zoe. Like Sonny and Cher. Or a corpse to a casket. Always together. Disgusting.

Jimmy was dressed like some slasher flick villain, complete with bloodstains. It didn't take much for Jimmy to look like a complete psycho. He already had the look of a criminal. And Zoe, she was dressed as herself. She would definitely win the scariest costume. That outfit of hers was horrifying.

"Well hello friends! Welcome to the night of tricks." Gary said with a theatrical bow. The boy unusually charasmatic. "Halloween, ah, can't you smell the stink bombs in the air?"

Pete whined over Gary's introduction. "Do I really have to wear this Gary? I look like a tool!"

"Yes, Petey. Don't interrupt!" Gary snapped at the smaller boy and turned his attention back to the ginger. "Jimmy, what have you done to trick the populace of Bullworth?"

"Nothing, I mean-" Jimmy started.

Pete cut off Jimmy and Gary yet again. He stomped his way up to the ginger and Gary like a son trying to get their parent's attention. Gesturing to the fountain. Which looked considerably less messy. "I flooded the fountain. I snuck into the janitor's supply closet and got some chlorine and-"

"Great. Trying to kill off the friendly bacteria now too? Nice prank loser." Gary shut his eyes to compose himself before speaking again. "Jimmy. Not Petey. Tell me, what hallow pranks have you played on the school?"

"Nothing." Jimmy said rather flatly.

A shock ran right through Gary as he practically shrieked. Mouth hanging open. "What?!"

"Zoe and I are leaving campus for Halloween."

Petey even looked shocked. Pestering the couple. "Aw man! You're not going to go trick or treating?"

"Trick or treating? You're too old for that stupid kid shit." Zoe said with a harsh tone.

Gary crossed his arms, twirling on his sandal as he growled loudly. "What do you mean 'leave campus'? You're such delusional losers! This is Halloween! Come on!" Gary gnashed his teeth. Pointing at the two. "Can't you two lovebirds do something else?! God, you're fucking attached to the hip!"

"Gary, I don't want to repeat last year. I'll remind you I fell through a skylight. And luckily enough I landed on you! I just want to go out and have a good time. Maybe you need to go and have some fun."

"What do you know what I need?!"

Jimmy shoved Gary. Somewhat jokingly. Somewhat maliciously. "We're going to some college house party or something. You need to chill the fuck out."

"As if! You and Zoe can go and be slags and slushes but I'm going celebrate Halloween the correct way. Come on Petey. You're coming with me."

Just as Gary started to descend the stairs towards Bullworth, he heard Petey perk up. "Oh no! Not this year."

Gary's head had twisted back in the direction of Petey. Who stood very confidently, in his child costume. Then to Zoe and Jimmy.

"So, thats how its gonna be, huh? Some friends you are!"

"Why not spend Halloween with that girlfriend of yours?" Zoe said in that mocking tone.

"F-fuck you guys! I get accused of being boring but you're all boring and predictable!" Gary had stopped his trek and bellowed. Anyone that was nearby stopped and watched as the local nutjob screamed. The halloween night being disturbed. "You all just abandon me! You always just do whatever you want to do and leave me out of it! Not tonight! I'm doing the leaving this time."

"Gary! Don't go! We didn't mean it like that!" Pete called out to Gary.

Yeah, right.

"Let him cool off. Come on, let's go." Jimmy had already banded his 'friends' together.

Gary strolled around the campus dejectedly. Kids whizzing by. Egging shit and throwing handmade stink bombs. As if it were nothing. The sounds of laughter and cries.

Fuckers.

He could hear the bell echoing. His head craned up to the bell tower. It was nothing more than an echo of the past. That was where it all took place. It was only a year ago.

If things would have been different.

He would still be head boy. People would trust him... well, just trust him because they were so weak minded. But, if he had never went to Happy Volts he would have never got... got to meet-

Ugh, what was he even thinking? He disgusted himself.

The sound of a familar gossiper's peppy voice rang in his ears like tinnitus. "Hey! There's Gary Smith! You really think he never got discharged and he's some escapee?"

"Totally!" Angie said with as much enthusiasm. "The scar says it all! So dangerous!"

Gary came face to face with two girls with ugly green noses and witch hats. But they were of course Christy and Angie. "Oh my, my, my. Christy, I should have known." Gary had given the girls a smile that even a fox would have gagged at. Not so sly. "What cute costumes... Are you hags?"

"No! Not hags, you silly!" Christy giggled at the 'cute' part. But not at the obvious jab with 'hag'. "Witches!"

"Hey! Like, what are you supposed to be?" Angie, Gary remembered that she was a witch last year, had no real imagination and was a witch yet again.

"Caligula."

"Calig-u-what? Oh my gosh, thats so weird." Christy snorted before gesturing to Angie. "Me and Angie are, like, magical witches, bitches!"

The two of them squealed, holding each others hands as they did so. Like an awkward sitcom. Although, it was probably all they knew. Too much TV rots the brain after all.

"Two forths of the cheerleader squad are here so... where is Mandy and Pinky?"

Christy was so loose lipped he expected an answer almost immediately. But instead...

"Top secret!" Christy held a finger to her pouty lips slathered with pink lipgloss.

Gary was again taken aback by the bubbly cheerleader. And she was withholding information? Not like her at all. "Top... secret?"

"Yeah, what's the password!" Angie placed her hands on her hips, leaning into Gary's personal space.

Gary thought all this kiddie shit was annoying. Especially passwords and squealing. "Password? Nobody gave me a password!"

Christy was next to compromise his personal space bubble. Finger jabbing into his shoulder. "Yeah, if you want the juicy gossip, you gotta have the password! That's the rules! Duh."

"Is the password, 'gimme the fuckin' gossip'?"

Both Angie and Christy locked hands, laced fingers and let out another girlish giggle.

"Just kidding! You should have saw your face! She's at that college party in Blue Skies. Well, Mandy is anyway. Harrigton house has their own party but it's wealth exclusive. Pinky is there, of course."

Angie grumbled to herself. "Ugh, so not cool that we weren't invited!"

"I know right! We're cool! We're popular!" Christy chimed.

Gary took a mental note. Prying. Seeing how much he could get out of the two. "So, Mandy is at the college party?"

"Yeah! I heard that Mandy invited the greaser gang along too." Christy eyed Gary before smiling brightly. "Mandy seems awfully chummy around Johnny now. It was all you, by the way. You know, I haven't seen Lola around him as much. Maybe Mandy will really get with Johnny."

"I heard she got into a spat with Mandy. Someone wrote mean things on her mirror! She asked me who it was. She and Johnny are on the rocks, for sure."

The two were like parakeets. One would squeak and then the other would squeak back. Leaving Gary to just ask a question and he got more than he wanted for answers.

"You heard that too? It got really ugly! I hope they break up. Mandy and Johnny would be so cute." Christy said dreamily. "I would know all the dirty details about Johnny, too."

Getting more gossip of course.

"Where's Lola now?" Gary said. Rubbing is palms together. Practically fighting the excitement.

"Hanging outside that greasy garage. She looked really upset."

"I would be too, if your boyfriend was thinking about leaving you for someone who throws up so much." Angie said off hand, adjusting her glasses. "Mandy's always puking. It's so gross."

"Oh my gosh, and it's so bad for your teeth! Just like, skip a meal or two, duh. Anyways!" Christy looped her arm with Angie's and gave Gary look. A friendly one. Too friendly. Almost come hither. "Me and Angie are gonna go trick or treating later. If you want to come with us, let us know! Witches need a broomstick. We need to hitch a ride, if you know what I mean... And don't worry, we're like, totally good at sharing!"

"Yeah, Gary." Angie purred at the boy. Glasses slipping down her nose. "We can share at the same time, too! If you don't want to be our broomstick, you can be our lollipop."

Oh.

"Uh, I'll pass."

Gary didn't like the implications of that and decided to just take off to the garage. Leaving the girls to giggle to themselves.

The hags.

Gary peeked around the corner to the greaser domain. Seeing a woman dressed in white in front of the door to the school garage. A red cherry hanging off her cigarette. Illuminating her. Her brown eyes met his and then down to the asphalt. When they met his again, they were sharp as steel. The way she looked at him made him uneasy.

Gary mentally prepared himself. Approaching her. She gathered herself. Flicking her cigarette. White tresses glowing in the moonlight. No Johnny in sight. It was unusually quiet around the greaser's hangout.

She was there. Alone. Staring him down like a predator.

Was this the face that launch'd a thousand ships, and burnt the topless towers of Ilium?

"And just who are you supposed to be?" Gary said snarkily.

Both wearing something akin to togas. Vines of gold and green adorning their head. Both the same costume, but both very different people they were portraying.

But somehow, they were the same person.

"I'm Helen of Troy. Let me guess, Julius Caesar?" she mumbled from between her cigarette.

Gary corrected her quickly. "Caligula."

"Oh. Easy mistake. Come to stir shit with the greasers too, huh? Are you ready for war?" her hand appeared from behind her back. Flicking a switch as a silver blade jutted out. A switchblade. "You are Caligula, right? A madman. A leader. You should start your takeover."

"What are you getting to?"

"Cut the tires on Johnny's bike, baby." she tossed the blade at him. Gary caught it with ease. It had obviously belonged to Johnny at one point. He couldn't see Lola owning a switchblade. "He cares about his bike more than me. Hell, he cares about a lot of things more than me."

"You sure you won't squeal?"

"Of course not."

Lola fished a key ring from within her toga. How she did it, he wasn't sure. She laid the keys in his other palm.

All the permission he needed.

"You sure?" He asked once more.

"Do it."

And he did as he was told.

Gary with a quick twist of the key, he cracked the garage door open just enough and slipped inside. Roomy. Full of scraps and spare parts. An open tool box. Oil and the smell of grease. There, in the middle of the garage, a bike.

A shell of a bike. With its parts splayed around it. But it was loved. It was a surprise to see a bike that someone had spent so much time putting together, going to get the knife. It made Gary smile.

He knelt down and drove the switchblade in the tire, cutting through hard rubber in a sawing motion. And for a little extra, Gary stood, kicking the bike as hard as he could. It collapsed on the ground with a hard, mechanical thud. Clattering. Bleeding fluids.

Johnny's second love, destroyed.

"What the hell, Gary! Get out of there!"

He hurried his way back to Lola. Hearing her hiss. Maybe he went a little far. But then again...

Then the two were running. Like Bonnie and Clyde leaving the scene of a crime.

After he slashed Johnny's tires he felt... invigorated! It was the first thing he had actually done to the greasers. Maybe he should have left something behind to blame the jocks. His heart raced.

"Come on! Someone will see us if you keep dragging your feet!"

Though Gary's body moved to keep up with Lola, his mind was still in the moment, relishing what he had just done. Despite knowing that'd it be smart to stay quiet as they left the scene, Gary couldn't help but cackle at his victory, however small it may've been, a victory is still a victory. His laughter was quickly cut short by a red-nail painted hand that firmly clamped itself across his mouth.

"Jesus Christ, do you actually want us to get caught? Could you just shut the hell up for one sec?"

Snapping out of his trance-like mania, Gary quickly picked up Lola's advice, increased his pace to keep with Lola, and silencing himself, there'd be time for laughter later.

"Where are we going exactly?" Gary whispered as they were nearly in the clear.

And Lola had stopped just short of the girl's dorm, probably making sure that no stranglers were in sight. She dragged him along, up the stairs.

"My room! Jesus Christ, you just had to kick his bike." She flicked his face. Causing him to curse out loud. Lola stopped and dragged Gary back. Spotting Mrs. Peabody. "Fuck. Well, you have any ideas? She's scooting around. I though she was going to be at the faculty party."

"Hell if I know." Gary frantically whispered. If it had been a student that saw them, Gary would've resorted to either intimidating them to keep their mouth shut, or kick their ass till they forgot they even saw him and Lola, but this was a faculty member. Trying any direct approach when they where leaving the scene of the crime would make them look way too suspicious. And when it would eventually get out that Johnny's tires got slashed, it wouldn't take a genius to put two-and-two together to figure out which two people did it.

"How have you gotten out of this kind of shit before?" Lola barked through clenched teeth, "Whatever worked before before, just do it again!"

Thinking back to the last time he got out of a real tight spot, Gary grabbed Lola by the shoulders and pulled her lips into his. The two now looked directly into each other's eyes, one had an expression of shock with a hint of embarrassment, while the other held a gaze of pure determination, with also just a hint of embarrassment, though not nearly as much as last time.

Hearing Peabody's footsteps drawn nearer to them, they both got into places and held each other in a way they thought two drunk lovesick teenagers making out in the middle of the night would. Hands found their way around hips as the two closed their eyes and tried to act natural. But a few moments later, the sound of footsteps rounded the corner near them, suddenly stopped, and then quickly backtracked before becoming more and more distant before fading off entirely.

She tossed him away with an expression of surprise and disgust. "What the hell was that?!" She fumbled for her compact, checking her lipstick. She turned from him completely. As if hiding from him. But in the mirror, it told the truth. Red claws traced the edges of her lips. Her cheeks resembled the crass color. "You almost messed up my hair!"

The archway that lead to the girl's dorm mocked him.

Now sprawled out across the grass, Gary gasped for air like a fish out of water, as he'd been holding his breath the entire time. He knew it was just a few seconds but hell it felt like it took forever. "You told me to do 'what worked last time'." he said in between breaths, "Plus, you should be thanking me."

"Thanking you? For messing up my makeup and slobbering on me?"

"Geez, give me some credit here, I just saved both our asses." Gary said, his breathing becoming more steady as he slowly sat up. "If it hadn't have been for my quick thinking we'd both end up on the top of the list of suspects for who slashed that asshole's tires."

As much as Lola hated to give him that credit for letting them dodge that massive bullet, she made an exception just this once.

"Fine, fine, fine." she said as she clicked her compact shut. "Turns out you do have some good ideas every once and awhile." Her tone now going from stern disapproval to respectful, she continued. "And if weren't for you we would've probably gotten into some serious shit."

A triumphant smirk slowly forming on his face, he opened his mouth to continue his prai-

"But just for future reference, wise guy, if you really wanted a kiss all you had to do was ask." Lola finished with a sly yet playful grin, getting to her feet and starting to walk off.

Gary's confident expression now being undermined by the redness in his face, he quickly got to his feet and chased after her. "Oh please, like I said, I was just doing as you asked, but sounds like you were over here enjoying it now, huh?"

She spun, her Greek gown catching in the night glow. Glowing. White-armed, long robed, and richly tressed. But she was still a filthy Greek goddess. "I am enjoying my Halloween night, thank you very much!"

"What about that party in Blue Skies?"

"What about it?"

"Aren't you going to go?"

"Johnny and I aren't on fair terms! He's probably cheating on me with that slut as we speak." Lola shouted. "She wrote all over my mirror. She's been whispering about me like a coward. I wish she would just burn a hole in her throat already and puke herself to death." Her mouth exploded with insecurities. "I'm pretty. I'm a nice girl. I'm nice to everyone!"

"Maybe that's your problem." He quipped.

Lola stopped in her tracks. A cold, tension filling the air around them.

"And what exactly is that supposed to mean now?" She said, turning around to meet his gaze. "Tell you what, I'll save you the effort of having to explain yourself. I don't think I need to take advice from you Gary Smith." Her tone becoming more harsh to answer the challenge before her.

"Judging from how 'well' you seem to get along with everyone else here at school, I'd say whatever method you're using is pretty much just shit." Though he'd rarely, if ever, seen Lola get this angry before, it wouldn't make him back down. "I don't know about you, but I'd rather all these morons on campus hate me than let them walk all over me like I'm their tool." He barked back. "Being 'nice' and all is great for making people like you, but for actual results you need to step on some toes and screw people over."

Lola's glare became ever more intense as Gary went on, her temper rising ever so much higher with every know-it-all remark that came out of this smartass' mouth. "Sure, I don't have all that popularity crap that you and your friends fantasize about, but I couldn't care less about that." Gary said as his tone rose to reflect his newfound confidence "I'm in it for myself, I'm no one's puppet to jerk around, and unless you really enjoy having your strings pulled you'd better do some thinking and change some things otherwise that's ALL you'll ever be."

The woman railed back as a slap rang out. Interrupting the crickets. Her gaze intense. Her teeth clenched. Eyes mimicking his spark. "I belong to nobody." She hissed out. "I am not a plaything. Don't you ever talk to me like that again."

Gary stood silently.

"If I wanted to, you could be half dead with a pipe sticking out of your head by the end of tonight." She closed the gap between them. Gary still as she ranted on. "When you wanted to get closer with the cliques, I helped you. When you were out on the streets playing the role of a bum, I made you stop. When you needed the encouragement, I gave it to you." The woman kept raising her voice and getting closer and closer. Anyone in close proximity could hear her. "I was always consistent with you. I did it freely. I'm not controlled. Nobody controls Lola Lombardi."

Lola finished her stride just within a few inches of Gary, the two of them now uncomfortably close. He looked up directly into her eyes, the coolness in his gaze opposing the fire in hers. "Then prove it." He said, simply. "Prove that you aren't someone's plaything, do something you want to do, and forget about whatever the hell anyone else wants from you."

The pair stared at each other for what seemed like forever, Lola still absolutely fuming at Gary's accusations, and Gary almost impressed with how volatile she had become. He didn't think she'd ever be able to get this mad, but here she was, pissed off as all hell and just about ready to explode.

Lola was strong willed, but she still needed her peers, she was nothin- Gary's pompous inner monologue came to a slamming halt as he was lifted up by the shoulder straps of his toga and pulled into Lola's lips.

Shock and embarrassment overwhelmed him, of all the things she would've done right there at that moment, this was one of the last things he would've guessed. Grabbing onto Lola for support, he could almost feel the pure determination emanating off of her, the determination to prove him wrong and show she wasn't just some fucking plaything. While Lola had kissed him to tease and torment him, this was something else entirely, he felt something that hadn't been there before.

Between the surprise, embarrassment, and now passion, Gary became light headed, just about ready to pass out from everything happening so fast. Before he could though, Lola pulled back and dropped him onto his wobbly legs, which gave way and led him flat on the ground once more, gasping for air.

"Fuck Bullworth, fuck the cliques, fuck the greasers, fuck Johnny, fuck Mandy and most of all, fuck you Gary Smith." She yelled confidently. Her aggressive and defensive tone now turning to something more self-assured and confident, she looked down at the befuddled Gary, not with anger or rage, but with confidence and humility. "You're a son of a bitch Gary, but you're my son of a bitch." Her blushing cheeks and labored breathing matching his. "I like you a lot Gary, but holy shit does someone need to knock you down a hell of a lot of pegs, and that someone's gonna be me. I don't give a shit about Johnny, or his new damn whore, or about the rest of those greasy self-absorbed pricks, I'm done with it all. I needed a push to figure that out, but damn you just about pushed me off a fucking cliff, that I'd also be dragging you over too. So, thanks."

Thankfully, Gary was still too out of it to really process that 'thank you', at least his ego wouldn't be reinflating too quickly.

"That being said, never act like you know what's going on with me ever again, got it?" She said as she staggered over and crouched down next to him. Lola held her hand out to Gary, who by now had started 'waking up'. "Now get your ass up and let's get moving, it's a hell of a lot comfier in my room than it is out here on the lawn."


	22. Never Ending Night

Auburn hair curtained her face as she leaned down. And her lips were over his. The dull taste of cigarettes burned his senses. Red claws scratching down his covered chest. And the groans and moans she made were sickening.

The room spinning. It was all so Deja Vu. Like a dream he had.

Yeah.

And the vertigo wouldn't stop. Along with the familiarity of the taste of her lips.

It was just another night of passion for Lola... but what was it to Gary?  
His arms and legs heavy. He tried to move them, but they would not. Like the muscle relaxers that the orderlies would give by injections. The type that made him feel so relaxed.

Like he was asleep but his eyes were open.

A walking day dream.

Bright red lips dragging across his cheek, leaving a waxy streak, making the way to the nape of his neck before he could feel his earlobe being peppered in small kisses. And then warmth. A tongue tracing his earlobe, lapping every curve before biting on the shell of it.

He could feel his stomach shift and move. Churning. All the thoughts that ran through his head were so barbaric.

"I want to make you feel good, baby boy." she gasped out, as if she couldn't breathe. And then, he was somehow holding her hips. As if they were drawn to them. The fabric showing so much but so little at the same time. Feeling her skin from under the silk. Warm.  
He dreamt this day. A long, long time ago.

Gary's thoughts were scrambled. He wasn't sure how he felt. It all sounded so loud in his mind. The toga he worked so hard on being torn off him as though they were rags. Exposing himself to the cold air, making his hair rise and shiver.

The way the faint light from her lamp on her vanity illuminated her, he could see the faint pink color through the thin fabric. It wasn't a surprise that Lola didn't wear a bra. Trent would often brag about how she didn't wear underwear.

But, everything she did was purposeful.

The room's air was thick with something. His cheeks hot. His digits twitching under the silk. Palms running down her hips to her ass and then back again.

It wasn't like he was piloting his body. Someone else was at the control.

Biology.

She was half way attractive. Maybe. Actually, he took it back. She was ugly.  
Worthless.

It was all a ploy. And he was ensnared. Her bait so deliciously intoxicating.

Her lips over his again. Her tongue forcefully prodding against his teeth. And instead of clenching, he gave in to her.

Without vomiting.  
Without being sick.  
Giving into her willingly.

But what was he doing? And with Lola? Was she just manipulating him again? He had to put an end to this, stop it before something…

Gary broke the kiss and sat up on the bed, still holding Lola. Cradling her lower back. Feeling the fabric creeping up ever so slightly. His head now at her chest level, he looked upwards into her brown eyes.

He needed to escape. To run away. But his body decided against that. Fighting against the torrent of his nerves and emotions, ignoring the blaring alarms going off in his head. He knew what he was doing would somehow come back to bite him in the ass, but this was too good to ignore, as it was something he'd never truly had before.

"Gary, oh my!" Lola sang in surprise. "Getting all touchy now are we? Who said you could come up here with me?" He normally would've replied back with some snarky or taunting comment, though he couldn't muster the will to speak up. Overwhelmed with all that was happening, Gary remained silent.

For more or less, he was at her mercy now. And Lola knew it. Like a lioness preying on an untrained gladiator, she knew all too well he was powerless to her.

She interlocked her hands around his neck, staring down upon her loyal subject. His adams apple jerked when he swallowed. Suprised at the sudden pressure on his neck.

"What's the matter, not gonna address your queen with reverence as you should?" A mischievous gleam now sparkling in her eye.

Gary couldn't answer even if he wanted too, his heart beating too fast to let him slow down and think, and his breathing so erratic and rapid he barely had time to catch it.

"Well, if you won't put that breath to good use, then perhaps my servant doesn't deserve to breathe at all." she said before pulling Gary's face into her bosom, smothering him between her covered breasts.

He didn't know what to think anymore.

He pried himself out from between them. The silk irritated his face and his nose was crushed against her sternum. Gasping as he emerged. His eyebrows furrowed as he pinched and squeezed her waist he complained. "What are you try-ing to do to me? Kill me?" His voice cracked causing her to smile even more menacingly.

"I was hoping you'd pass out and quit complaining." She said jokingly, arms resting on his shoulders. Looking down on him quite literally. "Why are you here in my bed Gary?"  
That was a good question.

"What made you crawl into my arms? Please tell me baby. And leave in all the sordid details."

The way she said that made him feel so small. He was filled with a strange feeling as the voice in the back of his head echoed one thing.  
Bite.

He snagged her close to him, teeth burying themselves into the crook of her neck. Deeper and deeper. Lola let out a dark moan.

His bite was gentler than it usually would've been. He didn't want to hurt Lola... yet. All he had to do was just... act like he thought she wanted him to. Or even to better to exceed those expectations. Surprise her and lower her guard to him. Gary had a fair idea what kind of perverted shit she'd be into, his time with her had made sure of that. If she wanted rough, he'd be more than happ... willing to do what it took to get close to her.

Gary's teeth found themselves dislodged from her nape when pain started to shoot through him. She was tugging at his the top of his head. Buried in his locks, ripping them back. She locked eyes and spoke sternly. "Why are you in my bed Gary? You can't escape my question. And even if you try, I'm just going to ask again so-" she gave another tug which made Gary wince, "Why did you crawl into my arms?"

He wanted to ask her why she chose him. Why him? Was it because of his potential? Was it because she liked bad boys?

Probably the last one.

His guts were tightly twisted into a knot. It felt as though he would become sick but instead Lola tossed him back. Landing in a sea of pillows to cushion the fall back into reality.

"I love it when you're nervous Gary. You're so cute when you aren't scowling."She trailed her perfectly manicured nails down his chest. Goosebumps erupting in the red mark's wake.

Was there a future to this pleasure? Was it all short lived?

"Close your eyes Gary. Just feel me."

Lola unhooked the clasp holding her toga up. It fell gracefully in front of her. Breasts in clear view. He didn't agree with Mandy, they were quite perky. At least, from what he saw in that stupid magazine stuffed under his bed.

"Just trust me Gary. Let me lead."

She leaned down and he decided to do what he had been told. He closed his eyes and felt her. His body flush. Flush with hers. Her skin so sickeningly sweet pressed into his. Hands that laid on her traveled to her back. Pulling her down, wanting more. Her body soft to the touch. His body probably coarse. The occasional hair and pimple. Puberty and all that.

Their lips met again. This time in union. Soft. Moist. Wonderful. There was only so many adjectives to describe how her mouth felt on his. Each one better than the last.

This moment felt like forever.  
Was this the never ending night he truly wanted?

He wanted to kick in more pumpkins. Throw more stinkbombs. Ruin more lives. But ruining Johnny's life was suitable enough.

Gary's tongue reached out and touched Lola's lower lip. She invited it with a hum. They danced together. An undiscovered paradise.

This made him feel so human. So wrong. Vulnerable. But in a sense, he welcomed it. Like solace he so needed.

But it made him feel like a weak human, pretending to be strong.

It made him ask, 'who am I? Am I who I think I am? Why am I doing this?' A silent crisis.

Fingers running over each and every valley of her back. Each notch of her spine. Down to the tendons, he mapped them carefully. Heartbeat drumming erratically in his ears.

She rose up. Pulling away from his embrace. Lola was in his lap again and curious hands found Gary's wrists, before laying his palms onto her breasts. Her soft mounds pebbling to his touch as he circled them. He wanted to put his mouth on them, but was too much of a coward to even ask to do so.

The toga fabric didn't hide too much as he was somehow getting hard from all this. A rarity. Well, unless he's being an asshole.

"Imagine, me, having Gary Smith laying in my bed. Looking so desperate for me. I wish I had a camera so I could remember this moment forever." Another sigh. Another smile. Breasts moving under his hands when she ground against him. "It has to be fate baby."

"I didn't want to do this." He explained. As if it were so simple. "It's my stupid biology."

"And your biology wants me. Bad." Lola gestured by opening the rest of her toga. As if she were some kind of serial flasher and he was a normal civilian. Eyes tranfixed on his crotch, needing her attention as she rocked against him. Bare. Only thing covering his eyes from her was a patch of hair that was shaved in such a way. Groomed. "Look, you're twitching."

Trent was right.

The rather lewd and disgusting display made Gary start to sweat. He could feel it start to form on his forehead. The back of his knees. His back. Sweating profusely. The trembling. Then the familiar feeling of vomit.

"Don't worry, Gary. We have all night. I can go as slow as you want, baby boy. Virgins are my favorite."

Eyes avoiding her. Digging into the sheets under her thighs. He couldn't bring himself to admit it. A liar. "I'm not a virgin."

"Then I am too. Well, I can pretend. Just for you, Gary." Hands reaching down to cup his cheeks as she tilted her head. "Here you are. Relish the moment. You'll be my best one yet. You won't recognize yourself once I'm done with you. I'll make you a man, baby boy."

"-I'll probably be packed with diseases too."

"Excuse me?" Hands that cradled his face now squeezed uncomfortably. Watching it melt around her hands. "I rule my room. I am a queen. This is my throne. You treat me as such."

"You know what happened to Marie Antoinette? She got beheaded by being a selfish bitch."

Hands laid themselves over his. Over her breasts. Her eyes fluttered shut. "We're going to be in tune with each other. Literally connected forever. I'll be your very first. You'll never forget me. Nobody forgets something like this."

Gary watched as her eyes opened. As if it were a trance. A moment of silence.

"Tell me you love me. I know you do."

Gary shrieked, feeling the words cut into him uncomfortably. "I might have a heartbeat, biology and all that crap, but I don't do love, Lola! I don't love you... And you don't love me."

"Quit lying."

She removed what was left of the toga. Dropping it to the floor. Her creamy skin glowing. The smell of cigarettes and cherries assaulted his nostrils. Her body slender, but curvy. The way he stared. Mouth parting. Gratitude and greed, one with each other. It was stupid.

"Take it all in Gary. I'm yours."

The way she looked at him, talked to him, touched him, it was all so stupid. Why did it all have to stimulate him?

Damned human biology.

"Your turn."

"My turn what?" He asked.

With a swoop, the woman above him ripped what was left of the toga away. Stitches coming loose and snapping. Leaving him in the scraps and his undergarments. The boy let out a horrifying groan. Feeling his face turn three shades hotter.

"Don't get embarrassed, now."

Lola lowered herself and parted his thighs apart. Sinking down between them. Taking position, propping herself up on her elbows. Like a teenager that twirled their hair and laid on their bed and yabbered on the phone. Gary placed his hands over his face. Her face... her body so close to such a sensitive area.. a nervous noise left his lips.

He reassured himself...

Gary was enjoying the dopamine. Not her. The chemicals. He loved the rush. Not her. He didnt want her. He wanted the chemicals.

He tried to rationalize it.

He felt so... naked. Not in the obvious sense.

Lola's tongue lavished his chest. Making her way down. Feathering it with kisses. Gary strained against the mouth. Trying to uncomfortably shift away. But lola held him down, accompanied by a stern look. Then, ever so slowly, inching the waist band down. The attention coming closer and closer to where his body wanted but his mind did not.

She was so close. Physically. But mentally, who knew if she was there in that moment. It made his heart sink to think about.

Lola uncovered him, agonizingly slow. Length springing up. She flinched as it almost hit her in the face. "Gary, I didn't think you were spring loaded."

"Ugh, shut up."

Wrapping her fingers around his shaft. Her dark eyes. Her lipstick smeared. Somehow here. It wasn't a dream. It was his reality where Lola was going to... she...

"Uncut, hm?"

"Lola, please shut up."

She left small lipstick prints around the base. Adoring it. Dragging her pink muscle up his cock. A drop was starting form at the tip when the pad of her thumb teased his slit. Smearing it around.

"Gary, I can't wait to fuck you."

With an expertise in pleasure, her pouty lips took him slowly. Eyes on him, watching for a reaction he tried not to give. But she was taking care of it. Taking care of him. So gentle. So unlike her. He could feel something prick the sides of his eyes. Lola made quick work, as he had to remind himself that this wasn't her first time, bobbing her head and cheeks hollowing.

Gary wanted to kick her. Shove her. Strangle her until she couldn't breathe. Thrust his hips upward and choke her. He let himself fall back. Eyes shutting. Letting him feel her.

The point of no return was edging so close.

Then, it happened.

What drew him from his thoughts was the sound of loud knocks. At her door. In the middle of the night. Both Lola and Gary jerked upward at this, heads turned to the noise. Then a voice came booming from the other side.

"Lola! Hey! Open up already!"

Johnny.

The door knob jiggled and she grit her teeth painfully. Ushering Gary up with her hands. Practically shoving him away. Gary groped up his toga and covered himself, wrapping it around himself like a bath towel since she ripped it to shreds.

"Lola, open this damn door already! Come on!"

"Goddamn it, thought Johnny was at that party with that stupid slut." She spat to herself. She whipped her head back at Gary. Hissing out. "Hide, idiot!"

Gary did as he was told. He probably didn't want to be caught half naked by that big ape. He army crawled under her bed. Peeking up from under the bed skirt. Trying to calm his breathing.

Lola cried out when Johnny had finally slammed open the door with his shoulder. Nearly busting it off the hinges. Peanut and Norton then came into view beside Johnny. Like greasy body guards.

Fuck, fuck, fuck.

"What the fuck Johnny?!" Lola bellowed. "You fucked up my door!"

"Where is that little creep?!" Johnny brandished his famous pipe on his shoulder. The silver color of the weapon turning a mix of brown and red at the end. The last victims blood, presumably.

"Johnny, you're scaring me!"

"Algie! Where is he? I'm gonna kill him!"

Gary's heart was about ready to bust out of his chest and jump out the window with how fast and hard it was beating. Was this how it ended for him? Practically ass naked, hiding under a bed like an insect, getting beaten to death by some greasy meathead on Halloween? God he hoped not.

"Why are you asking me? How the hell would I know where that nerd is?" She shot back at him, the shock of him busting in starting to wear off. And anger replaced fear.

"Well you oughtta know 'cause you've been hangin' out with him the past few days doin' whatever the hell you've been doin'." Johnny fumed, bouncing the pipe off his shoulder and into of the palm of his hand. "So just tell me where he is so I can go teach that geek to stay away from my girl!"

"Christ Johnny! He's just another nerd that does my homework for me, that's it! It was the same thing when you accused me of having something with Gary! These guys are pathetic, even you know that!" Her frustration with Johnny now culminating in her speech. "If you ever took the time to pull your head out of your ass and think for just a second, you'd realize that!"

"What's this now? You tryin' to defend him now or somethin'?" Johnny spouted accusatorily. "Is there somethin' you wanna tell me Lola, cuz if I figure it out on my own I'm gonna be a lot angrier than if ye just tell me now. My bike is wrecked! My girl is being distant. Tell me already!"

Lola snatched up one of her sandals and hurled it at him, shouting angrily. He dodged it coolly. "Why the hell would I stick my neck out for some nobody? And just what the fuck are you trying to say?"

Her face now turning as red as her lips, she stood up, barely managing to cover herself with her toga, and began approaching him.

"Did it ever occur to you that attacking anyone who gets within five feet of me is gonna get your ass in serious trouble, huh? You already took a trip to the looney bin 'cause of your shit, and if you start thrashing people again they'll toss you somewhere where you'll never get out of. Why can't you just see that I'm trying to keep you out of trouble?"

"Lo, I just want to protect you!"

"Oh God, Why do I even fucking bother!"

Gary huddled under the bed like a kid in one of those nineteen-thirties duck-and-cover pamphlets. There was nuclear hellfire raining down around him, and yet he had managed to remain completely unharmed, for now anyway.

Norton had begun to open his mouth. "Look we ain't gonna hurt-"

Lola had tossed the other sandal at Norton. Whizzing passed him and causing the mirror on her vanity to explode in violent shards. Makeup and anything else laying on the vanity, scattered with the force. Lamp hitting the ground. The soft light turning harsh. Norton covered himself. Lucky that he was wearing leather. "Shit! Whoa!"

"Get out." Lola started again. Grabbing Peanut by his jacket and tossing him towards the damaged door. "Get out! Get out, you fuckheads!"

Nobody talked back to Johnny's girl. They did what they were told. The visages of Norton and Peanut quickly vanished behind Johnny, and the sounds of their footsteps could be hear trailing off as they descended the stairs.

Lola trained her sharp gaze on Johnny, who still had yet to leave. "I'm done talking to you, so what the hell are you waiting for?" The harshness in her voice betraying just a hint of being hurt.  
Johnny opened his mouth to try again, but his unspoken question had already been answered by Lola's glare.

The uncomfortable silence was broken by Johnny. Practically ripping open his chest and showing her his still beating heart. He closed the gap between them. Tossing the pipe aside. Caressing her face. His brash tone turning soft and vulnerable. "Lola, I love you. I-I'd do anything for you. But you don't look at me the same way anymore. I'm not your main man. Who is it? I'm worried, Lo."

"Why are you still here?" Her voice wavered. Face leaning against his hand. Trying to get away from his intense emotional garbage.

"Lo, please. Please. Please." He dropped to one knee. As if he were a small child begging for his mother's praise. Pressing her hand into his forehead. Pleading. "Please Lo. You know I love you. I love you more than all the stars up in that sky! You're my whole world. I'd do anything for you. Anything! You deserve it, baby. You really do."

"Anything?"

"Anything! You're my baby girl and I'm your baby boy! That's how it's always been, Lo. So, why don't I see you anymore? It hurts, Lo. You're really hurtin' me."

"Why were you at the party with Mandy then? When you knew she wrote all over my mirror and said all that shit to me? Why come breaking in my room?" Her voice becoming more and venomous. The tone harsher and harsher with every word. "You don't trust me. You're just looking for a way out. Pitiful. You were never this paranoid."

"That's not true! I was invited. I ain't got feelings for Mandy, that just ain't true-"

The look of disgust painted her face as he groveled at her feet. She whipped her hand away with a flat. "Get out."

Hanging his head in in defeat, he backed out of the doorframe, grabbing his pipe, and followed his cronies down the hallway and to the first floor. Lola stomped over to her door and slammed it shut, it's loosened hinges rattling against the doorframe as it shut.

"You can come out now." She muttered, not bothering to turn back around to face Gary. "How'd you enjoy the show?"

He wondered what show she was referring to.

Gary crawled out from under the bed. Body covered in sweat. He could only sit on his ass, letting out the breath he had been holding. "Oh shit, should I go too?"

"If you wanna stay here be my guest." She said as she started strip, sliding into her clothes. Toga discarded. "But I know I sure as hell ain't."

Gary stood there still absorbing what had just happened. Nearly escaping death by Johnny was one thing, but seeing Lola as furious as she had been was something else entirely. It took something extreme to put her off her normal cool persona that she normally had.

"W-where are you going to be heading then, especially this late?"

"Don't really care." She said dryly. "As long as it's off this campus and far away from that..." Gary followed suit in gathering up his things, though unlike Lola he didnt have any real clothes to change into, so he had to settle for what parts of his costume where intact. "I'll be blowing this popsicle stand as soon as I get my makeup on, so that'll be about twenty minutes."

"I guess, I'll be heading back-"

"So, if you wanna tag along, you've got that much time to meet me at my Vespa in the parking lot, got it?"

"Lola." It left his lips too softly. Too nice. Even for him.

She didn't reply. She didn't even look at him. She strolled to her vanity. Broken shards and large pieces littering the floor. Like a little million stars.

He could see her expression from the few bits of mirror that still clung to the frame. Her cheeks red. Her nose red. Tears refusing to slip. Avoiding his gaze at all costs.

Gary never comforted anyone. Comforting someone gave someone else peace. Not him. He was selfish soul.

Not sure what to do, Gary reached out a hand and placed it on her back. He hoped it would comfort her. He rubbed his palm in a circular motion. Clumsily. Awkwardly.

Gary wasn't sure if he could even say anything to assure her. Instead he left without another word. Hand leaving her. Deciding to make a silent escape. The commotion would have surely woke Ms. Peabody. Lola could have lied and said that the mess was due to a meltdown.

But, everyone knows why those types of things happened to a girl like Lola.

Boy trouble.

He ascended the stairs to the musty old attic. Slipping the window up. Glad that it didn't stick. Giving the dorm one last look.

Lola.

He weighed his options. He could run away with her. Gary liked to run. He liked living out a bum life style for a few days. He'd admit that. But, Bullworth was home. This was where he felt like himself.

He wanted to rule. With or without her around.

But something would be missing without her there.

He climbed down the lattice to the ground. Hoping that no prefects were wandering around. He made a noise of discomfort. In his stomach, it was fluttery. Disgusting. Gary could feel the stinging of acid in his throat.

Distracted, he didn't hear the footsteps behind him.

Distracted, he didn't smell the smoke from a lit cigarette.

"It was you! You, motherfucker!"

When Gary finally noticed that someone was behind him, it was far too late. When Gary had turned to face the person, he could see an outline of someone and a gleaming silver pipe before it swung into the side of Gary's head. The loud noise of metal connecting with flesh echoing outside the girl's dorm. Gary's body limp from the force of the swing.

Then, there was nothing.

Blackness.

Darkness.

As if he had shut his eyes to sleep.


	23. Unfortunately Human

There was noise. A lot of noise he couldn't hear. As if were muffled. And then lights from beneath his eyelids.

When the darkness started to fade, and his senses were coming back to him, the fuzzy world reappeared. Bits of sunlight striking him right in the eyes. Causing his already foggy vision to be worse. The sun, however, warmed his skin. But a persistent chill ran over him. Gary saw his hand first. He attempted to move it. Feeling bits of rocks and shards under his fingertips... and his cheek. He was face down. Asphalt. But where? Before he could regain any other sense of self, he could hear someone beside him.

"Look, he's waking up."

He rolled his eyes over to a woman. Light auburn hair curtained in front of her face as she assisted him onto the flat of his back. He rolled over limply. He couldn't move. Frozen. Red claws stroking locks of hair out of his face.

Gary spoke between cracked and dry lips. "Lo-Lola?"

"Shit, you had to have gotten hit pretty hard if you think I look like that ugly bitch." The voice said in a brash tone. His vision still double and blurry. "He got hit pretty hard. He's covered in blood."

Then that idiot stepped into view. Jimmy wearing that cheesy and stupid slasher costume. He knelt down beside Zoe. Inspecting him as Gary began to regain some energy to move. It felt like he had been run over. Twice. A pounding headache. That's when that loser opened his stupid mouth. "It looks pretty bad, I agree."

"Do you think he's okay? I told you we shouldn't have let him go last night!" Petey could be heard from somewhere his eyes couldn't reach. Panicked and frightened as usual.

Gary attempted to move the best he could. Feeling his legs move dully. Slowly. Heavily. When a freckled hand forced his leg back down. That stupid ginger. "Don't move. You're really messed up. You'll go hurting yourself even more."

"What time is it then?" Gary had remembered that time was important. He didn't remember how important.

The side of his head throbbed.

Maybe it was all a horrible nightmare. He didn't drink anything. He didn't go to that party... in Blue Skies. Yeah, there was a party, from what he could remember.

Then he felt as though he was floating upwards. Maybe his spirit had left his body. Died right then and there. That's when he felt Jimmy's hot mouth next to his ear. His head sloshed forward. Unwilling to listen as it hung weakly. "It's morning, man. Let's get him to the nurses office. Nurse McRae can probably fix him, hopefully. Zoe, wanna grab his legs?"

She had crouched down to grab him as a shot of adrenaline ran through his veins, right into his heart.

Regaining his strength, struggling in their combined grasp. His memory coming back to him. The silver pipe. The culprit. Lola. That night in her room. Hiding beneath her bed. The Vespa.

He had to meet her. He had to tell her his decision. He had to.

She was there. She had to be.

He only had twenty minutes. If he could, he could still make it.

"Let me go, idiots! I can walk on my own! I don't need help!"

"Stop struggling man!" Jimmy shouted to him as he had wiggled out of their grasp. Falling to his knees before once again pushing himself upright. Limping. Struggling to keep his balance. Now noticing red trailing down the bridge of his nose in his vision. But it wasn't important.

She would be gone.

He could still make it.

Gary lost his footing as his legs had tangled with each other. Crashing down like a meteor. Petey was the first to reach him. Then Jimmy. Holding him down as if he were an unstoppable force. Holding him down as his muscles trembled. Trying again to get up.

"Gary, please don't get up!" Pete pleaded. Placing the least amount of pressure down upon him. "We don't want you to get anymore hurt than you already are."

"Yeah. And you're in your underwear man! You got jumped. You can't just run off. You gotta get patched up!" Jimmy tried yet again to explain to him. Not pleading like Pete. Demanding. Rougher in tone. "Don't be a dumbass."

Gary repeated in a defeated tone. "What time is it?"

"Like, early morning. We all just got back from the party." Zoe said in an abrasive tone. "How many fucking times do we have to say it? Did your brains get splattered too?"

Jimmy and Pete both sat him in a sitting position. Blood running down his face faster now. Hitting the concrete. Darkening the ground beneath him. A curious hand touched the stream. Gary looked down to the red substance on his fingertips.

Crimson red.

If Ms. Phillips was there, she would have told him red had a deeper meaning.

His chest and stomach was lavished in bruises of ruby red and royal purples. He didn't wonder about his face. He couldn't think about anything else at that moment.

"She's gone."

"She who?" Pete asked inquisitively.

No one would listen. No one could help him. No one could fix it. And no one could understand it if he had tried to explain it.

If she was gone, she was truly gone. He couldn't undo it. And talking about it wouldn't undo it. There was no point.

Gary wasn't even sure if he really understood what he was thinking.

Gary reflected on his thoughts and then to how he should have felt. Something was off. In his chest, deep down, he felt something stir that he hadn't felt stir before.

Gary slumped even farther down. Hanging his head in a mixture of guilt and shame. Finding himself choking up a little. Still woozy. Now lost. Confused. Angry. Upset. So many emotions he didn't quite understand.

Emotions he was positive he never possessed. Never did he once care for another. Never once did he feel empathy towards another. Never once did he truly feel anything akin to what he felt in that moment.

"She already left."

Looking back, he felt pathetic.

Something changed in Gary. A metamorphosis in the crazed and mad leader, Caligula.

He had... a real beating heart.

Unfortunately, he was human.


	24. Three Morons and a Cold Shoulder

October turned into November far too quickly. And November then turned into December. Time never stopped and it went on and on without Gary really experiencing it. The blur never subsided. Gary couldn't help staring out of his window. Feeling lifeless.

He felt stuck.

Sitting crosslegged on his desk. Forehead pressed against his dorm window. His breath fogging the glass, ever so slightly. Snow slowly crashing to the ground.

When she left, Johnny and his lackeys went looking. That lasted for a grand total of two weeks. When they didn't find her, Johnny assured his gang that she would come back. That it was just another hissy fit.

Well, she didn't come back.

Johnny appointed Norton as leader. Leaving with a 'stay golden, pony boy' and he disappeared too. Probably looking for her, too.

If she left, she didn't want to be found. Lola was like that.

The greasers were unstructured without a leader. And with Norton at the helm, they were always itching for a fight. Johnny had a pipe, sure. But Norton liked his sledgehammer. He didn't brandish it... but he was known for it.

Jimmy was busy playing dove and olive branch with those idiots.

Gary rooted through his pocket, opening his palm. Looking down to the lipstick. He removed the cap. To see crushed wax. It was the only physical thing he had that belonged to her. It wasn't like she was dead or anything. He wasn't sure why he felt like she wasn't coming back anytime soon.

Maybe that's why he felt so off.

When Lola left, the notes stopped. The eyes had shut. The paranoia subsided. His standing with the school was an uncomfortable okay. The nerds enjoyed his company. Algernon still mentioning that he was their knight. Everything was back to the way it was. It was as if she wasn't real. A walking phantom.

Everything was backwards.

After he was attacked, his swollen face returned to a splotchy red and pale. And the stitches on the side of his head were removed and turned into another scar he adorned.

And maybe Zoe was right. Maybe his brains were scrambled.

And then that night with Lola... he didn't feel quite the same.

He never got to tell her his answer that night. She just left. And it hurt.

He was supposed to be this unfeeling jerk. Maybe he was. He was supposed to be a sociopath. And here he was. Moping. Depressed. Finding himself all alone again. Like the asylum.

The hardest thing for Gary was letting people in. And then they always left. But usually it was his fault. Ruining their lives. Sending them to therapy. Damaging their health in some form or another. Things like that.

Not like this.

A timid knock came from his door as a face barely peeked inside. Pete. Gary was already assured who it was when they spoke. "Uh... Hey, Gary! How's it going?"

He gave him a timid look when he finally approached Gary. A fragile smile.

"Fine."

"Oh, that's really cool! Hey, uh, me and Jimmy wanted you to come with us to today. Since, you know, winter break is coming up and I live here and Jimmy wants to stay for-"

"I think I'll pass." Gary capped the lipstick and hid it in his closed fist. Sliding off his desk and making his way towards his bed. The wood floors cold on his bare feet. He flopped into the cot. Letting himself sink into the squeaking mattress.

He wished that Pete would just leave him alone.

Pete was always trying to get him to leave this room. It wasn't working. It just ended up annoying Gary.

"Come on Gary! Please?" Petey planted himself on the side of his bed. His bed. Gary's. Feet dangling off the side. Eyes glimmering like a child. Gary hated it. One, he was pleading. Two, he was invading his space with his Pete-ness. His femme-boy wiles would not work on him.

"Why are you begging?"

"Because we're worried about you!" Pete conveyed with his hands. Holding them to his chest. "You've been a shut in. You aren't acting like yourself. We don't want anything happening to you."

"We?" Gary snorted at that. Who else besides Petey gave a shit. He highly doubted it was anyone important. "Who is we?"

Another voice came from the hall. Listening like a rat in the walls. "Me."

That idiot came walking in like he owned the place. Slamming the door into the wall. Practically busting in. Heavy feet on creaky floors. Ginger. Freckled. Bald. Like an aging old man. Jimmy.

"Jimmy? Ugh, don't you two morons have someone else to harass?" Gary's bones creaked as he sat up. Ready to storm out of his room to get away from these idiots. "What is this, some kind of intervention?"

"Intervention? I wouldn't call it that." The ginger also occupied his personal space. Raping it. As an arm slugged over his shoulder. Jaw pressing into his cheek. "It's your lucky day, Gary. Come on, Johnny's not gonna beat you up... this time anyway. I promise."

A hearty laugh escaped his lips as Gary's elbow connected into his side, causing him to wheeze. Anger washing over him and his now crowded dorm room.

"Jimmy-boy, I'll have to pass."

Jimmy rubbed his sore ribs. Rolling his eyes at the mopey and gothy Gary's attitude. "We can throw snowballs at some unsuspecting greasers. I know that might make you feel better. Hell, we can put the snow around rocks and throw em."

"No." Gary said. Pouting. Crossing his arms. Maybe like a child.

Petey was next to make up an idea. Another stupid one too. "I know what I can do to make you feel better. I can make us some hot chocolate! That always cheers me up!"

"Pete, please. I want to make Gary leave his room, not convince him to stay."

"Oh... yeah, sorry." Petey apologized.

"Can you two get out of my room? I don't want to be bother-"

Jimmy was the next to but in. The two getting too close for comfort. "We can see Rudy the bum. I know you like bums since you turned into one for a bit. He usually pretends to be santa for cash. We can always steal his can."

The two mouths wouldn't stop moving. Gary couldn't stop himself from gritting his teeth uncomfortably. Gary rolled the lipstick back and forth in his fist. Trying to keep calm as the two boys tried to brainstorm a hairbrained scheme to get him out of his stupid room.

"Will you two stop harassing me if I go and do something?"

"Probably." Petey glowed.

"Fine. But I'm going to hate every minute of it."


	25. Icy Reception

With a heavy sigh, Gary slid on his jacket and laced up his combat boots. Making a mental note of what to wear outside, he rifled through his closet and drawers for what he needed, hoping he wouldn't forget something important. He could still barley believe those two fools, somehow they convinced him to get out of his room. Those fuckers, he'd make sure to take his time in his room so they'd wait just a little bit longer in the cold.

He eyed the orange bottle of meds sitting on his desk, approaching it as if they called to him. Caligula the mad. Mad no more? Undoubtedly. Regrettably, he swallowed his dose. His meds took off the edge but made him dull. That much was true.

But if that's what it took to blend in with Jimmy, Petey, and the rest of the simpletons of Bullworth, then so be it.

He made his way out of the room and down to the front door. He pushed the door open and was greeted by a hellish icy landscape, and the half-frozen pair.

When Gary breathed in the air it stung his lungs, and burned his nose, the hairs in his nostrils freezing uncomfortably. It made his cheeks tingle.

He hadn't even made a step out the door and he was already hating every second of leaving his room.

Petey looked comfortable. He must have had at least three or four layers of clothes under his jacket.

And Jimmy. Well. He never could dress for the occasion. A light coat. That was about it. His usual ginger red cheeks a tinge deeper red than usual.

"Cold enough for you?" Jimmy prodded.

"Fuck off. What did you and Petey want to do today anyways?" Gary stuffed his hands in his pockets. Feeling the nip already burning his fingertips. "I'm busy today."

"I'm just surprised you're leaving your pout dungeon."

Before Gary could snap at Jimmy, Petey was already in front of the two. Smiling. "Let's go on a walk! We haven't actually done anything together in a long time! We can appreciate the snow and... uh, whatever." Staunching whatever else he was going to say as the two boys gave him the usual look of disapproval. "I mean, a walk sounds pretty good." Petey conceded, still maintaining his cheery smile.

Gary quickly followed up, "Great idea Petey, I'm sure we can find ourselves in some trouble." he said as a mischievous grin spread across his face "Or at least something entertaining anyways. There's always someone suffering out there for us to laugh at."

Petey's demeanor changed. Smile falling as a worried look replaced it. "Gary, that's not what I meant!"

Not even bothering to answer, Gary had already started striding down the snow covered sidewalk, with Jimmy following suit. Petey waddled his way after the two, desperately trying to catch up, fruitlessly asking for them to wait up.

The walk was long. The trio trekked all across campus, making several stops along the way to throw a snowball or two at the windows of their favorite professors. To no one's surprise, there weren't many other students stupid enough to brave the freezing cold, so sadly there weren't any passerby deserving of a well thrown snowball. With Gary leading the pack, he pointed the party in the direction that'd take them to the boardwalk. Before long they were across the bridge, the sound of crashing waves congratulating them on making it. Gary glanced over to the ocean. Still as restless as ever. He felt very connected to it. It was always calm on the surface but really rather intangible and unforgiving.

Gary made a noise of discomfort. "Too fucking cold."

"What, we going to the carnival?" Jimmy said, hands behind his head. Looking as though he was bored of the walking. Eyes flickering to Gary. "We keep heading straight we're gonna be there."

"Yeah! Do you want to go?" Pete added. "You think the rides are open?"

"Ugh. The carnival? Those creeps freak me out! I got a better idea." Gary said with a smile. The first full smile he had in sometime. "Why don't we help little Petey here get laid?"

When Gary had stopped and spoke that, the two had continued their traversing. Until it sunk in, and turned to the boy behind them. The words that came out of Gary were almost uncharacteristic. Sure he was a guy who brought up sex, but usually just to humiliate someone.

"What?" Jimmy's jaw dropped as his thin eyebrows rose. "You wanna help Pete? Like you fuck him or like, someone else fuck him?"

"G-Gary!" Petey's voice cracked.

"No, not me fuck him! Find him someone to fuck. I mean, that's what friends are for, right?" Gary said coolly. Taking a few steps in front of the two. "You can't be a virgin forever. That'd suck. You'll end up a cat lady or whatever."

Jimmy threw his hands up at the remark. Rolling his eyes. "Right. And you're the expert?"

"Oh, you know it, Jimmy-boy! I mean, I had a threesome with two witches on Halloween night."

Gary wasn't sure why he lied. But at least he was offered. It sorta counted.

"You didn't!" Petey held his hands over his mouth. Squeaking in surprise. "Really? You?"

Gary twirled on his heel. Giving the two a glance. Mostly in irritation. "Trying to say I'm not good with the ladies?"

"You're not good with anyone! Only way I'd see you getting with anyone is if you drugged 'em like Edna. But you wouldn't do something like that, would you Gary?" Jimmy crossed his arms, glaring at him, unconvinced. Looking for a slip in confidence and ego to call the bullshit out. "Spill the beans."

Pete watched on helplessly as Jimmy and Gary argued with each other. Going back and forth.

"You'd expect something that vile and desperate from me of all people, Jimmy? How could you?" Gary lamented, the sarcasm dripping in his voice. "And sorry, but I don't fuck and tell."

"You seem more of a virgin than Pete talking a big game like that." Jimmy returned snidely, "You're lying through those gaping teeth of yours."

"What, you want the hymens I destroyed too, Jimmy? I don't have to prove myself to you!"

"God, you're sick!"

The sound of a shoddy motorcycle disturbed their small argument. It was faint and far off, yet distinct enough to call right off the bat. The rattling of loosely fastened nuts and washers, the labored sputtering of a junkyard scrap engine, and the tortured squeaking and squealing of joints in dire need of oil. The boys turned to the noise as it got closer and closer, until it was clear that it was heading straight towards them. The leather clad rider chucked something at Petey, hitting him directly in the face, sending him flat on his back. A liquid yellowy substance was splattered across both his his face and jacket. He let out a noise of shock and disgust as he held out his arms and tried desperately to wipe it all off. "Eggs! Oh my god, gross!"

Jimmy and Gary snapped to the man who had stopped the bike a few feet down the road.

The rider spun his tires, as if to threaten them. It didn't do anything but prove his shitty ride wasn't street legal. The man that looked back at the boys was none other than Peanut. Lieutenant of the greasers.

"What- hey what gives Peanut?" Jimmy called out. Obviously taken aback.

"This is your fault, Jimmy! And that Gary, too! You ain't even looking for Johnny!" Peanut yelled angrily back over the deafening sound of the engine "You ain't even trying to help! Is that what a leader does? Leave his people when they need him most?"

"What the fuck are you talking about?" Jimmy said. Less confused and more pissed that someone just pelted Pete with a poultry product.

"Don't make me repeat myself Hopkins, because I'll make sure to get nice and close to ya to make sure you hear me." Peanut revved up the bike, and it roared in response, belching out black smoke from the tail pipe. He'd be getting real real close to Jimmy, real fast.

"That isn't my problem. Johnny went looking for his girlfriend. I'm not going to go find him. You greasers can handle that! I told you before! I'm not getting involved with that again!" Jimmy waved his hand at Peanut dismissively and turned around to help pick up Pete.

"You're not a leader, Jimmy! You're not even fit to be headboy's shadow! You just pretend!" Peanut fished a few small white items from his leather jacket pocket. "Don't you turn your back on me, hero, you look at me when I'm talking to you!"

Jimmy ignored him, and carried on picking up Pete. What it took was Gary piping up to get him to turn his head back. "Watch your head, Jimmy!" He had turned just in time to see three more eggs flying in his direction, the first two landing at his feet and the last one colliding with his the side of his head.

"Next time don't blow me off Hopkins, ha!" But before Peanut could take off down the street, Jimmy was already sprinting at him.

With a hiccup, his bike took off down the street. Teeth gnashing. Like old times. Like the foxes that were released for the hunt, Jimmy and Gary were the hounds.

"I'm gonna beat your ass!" Jimmy had shouted over the sounds of the motorized junk heap.

"Not before I do, Hopkins!" Gary spat through his sadistic grin. Now this was the kind of trouble he was talking about, this be would fun.

The Greasers' bikes were poorly made as even Jimmy could keep up with Peanut. And he wasn't the fastest runner in the world. Gary was trailing behind Jimmy, huffing and puffing at this point, barely making it up the hill in one go. "Fuck, these meds ruin my fitness." He said under his breath. His calves ached. His thighs trembling.

While Peanut's bike wasn't fast enough to outpace Jimmy and Gary, it didn't tire out and slow down like they did, and before long the gap between him and Jimmy grew larger.

"Pick up the pace Jimmy, because if ya keep runnin' like that, you'll be catching a cold before you catch me!" he cackled.

But it didn't matter where he went, Jimmy and Gary followed him all the way. Peanut made his way through the preppies' domain and towards the park, he was still a ways off from his destination, but both Jimmy and Gary knew where he was headed. Straight into a fucking trap. They could see it now, an abandoned bike with no Peanut in sight, a pack of greased up idiots move in to gang up on them.

Peanut had beaten them there by a good fifteen seconds. Jimmy gave himself a moment to loosen up. Rolling his neck and cracking his knuckles like a brute. "This doesn't smell like an ambush at all." Fists assuming their usual positions, Jimmy readied himself. Up and directed at some asshole who deserved it. Gary took the time to gasp for his breath. The cold winter air was cruel to his lungs, which were burning from it.

Within a few seconds, he had caught his breath and readied himself for some fisticuffs with a bunch of lowlifes. "Are you just going to charge in there and take them on all at once?"

"Beating the hell out of them has always worked before." Jimmy said dryly "and I've got a pretty good feeling it'll work again."

"Did that egg knock you brain out? You're definitely outnumbered, charging in there is just asking to get pummeled."

"Maybe that's a lot for you, but that's an even fight for me." Jimmy began marching towards the park "If you wanna go grab a hot chocolate and hide in your room till I get back go right ahead, then just say so, don't need to make excuses."

Gary stared half-dumbfounded and half-infuriated by his nerve before jogging to catch up to him. "Imbecile." he mumbled under his breath.

"We wouldn't be in this predicament if you would have just left me alone, James." Gary cursed as they walked to the over park.

"You were looking for trouble, and since you came out with us it ended up finding you. If anything, you should be thanking me."

"Hardly, we'll if see you earn my thanks after this fight."

The two strode into the park, and were somewhat surprised to see that the greasers had forgone setting a trap this time. Instead three idiots in leather stood in the middle of the park around Peanut's joke of a bike.

"Too easy! You followed me right in the snake pit." Peanut said, as he made some challenging steps towards the pair. The two other greasers stood their ground. It was Hal and Norton, and the latter was sporting a weapon.

"And lookee here." Hal got up and moved forward with Peanut. "Looks like our good friend Gary managed to make it too, ain't that swell!" The malice in his voice matched the look on his face. "You saved us a lotta time from having to track ya down later."

"You ain't nobody, Gary!" Norton said with disgust, following the lead of his two companions. "You shouldn't have gotten outta bed today." He dragged his sledgehammer behind him, leaving a distinct trail in the snow as he closed in.

The three of them slowly advanced on the pair, each one coming in from a different direction. Peanut right in front, Norton moving towards Gary, and Hal heading towards Jimmy.

"What the hell do you want with Gary? I though you dumb asses had a bone to pick with me?" Jimmy spat, somewhat confused at their aggression towards Gary.

"It doesn't really matter." Peanut began, he and his boys just within twelve feet of them, "Cuz we're gonna beat the tar out of you regardless."

"What's goin' on Gary, what's their beef with you?"

"Like he said it's not impor-" Gary started, but was cut off as the leather clad assailants charged at them.

"What the fuck did you do to the greasers, man?" Jimmy shouted to Gary as Hal came at him. He swung and swiped at Jimmy as if he were the last piece of cake at a birthday party. It was easy for Jimmy to out-maneuver Hal, and get in close for some quick jabs, but the fat greaser shoved him back with his ham fists, trying to get some space to fight back in.

Before the fighting broke out, Gary blinked and found himself back at the ring with Bif all that time ago. A freshman. Still wet behind the ears.

But not anymore.

Legs shoulder-width apart. Knees bent. Left foot to Norton. Chin down, eyes forward. Fists strategically up.

It was what he learned being a prep all that time ago.

Norton came rushing at Gary with sledgehammer in hand, letting out a yell as he swung. Light on his feet, he tried his best to dodge the maniac that came swinging. The sledgehammer was a slow and clumsy weapon, making Norton's swings child's play to read and dodge.

Bif had always said, 'to be a good fighter, you gotta have the eye of the tiger and the heart of a lion! Otherwise you're just a pennyless loser.'

Gary found himself doing a lot of moving. Finding it all coming back to him. Hopping from foot to foot. "You're gonna fight me with a sledge? That's pathetic. A real man would fight with his fists! I don't have to hide behind something as idiotic." The greasers would be the type to line their gloves with metal, scummy and slimy tactics like that fit them very well.

"I just like smashing things, and you're next!" The boy huffed and puffed. Putting all his strength in another upward swing. "I'm gonna send you back to the looney bin so messed up not even they'll know what to do with ya!"

Like all the swings before, this one was no harder to dodge. Norton was clearly winded from putting everything into that swing, and stumbled back a bit to recover.

Gary finally saw the perfect opening and lunged in to pummel him. Three lefts to the face in quick succession and his nose was already looking redder. A quick right to the side of the head sent Norton stumbling back another few steps. "Make this easier for the both of us you mongoloid, and lay down. It'll save me the trouble of having to show you your place, and it saves you from getting blood all over your leather jacket."

Norton made a noise of irritation, abandoning the sledgehammer and rushing Gary, grabbing him by the waist and dragging him down. The two went tumbling in the powdery snow.

"I know what you did you little shit." Norton cursed. Fumbling to get on top of Gary.

"You don't know anything, you peon!" He hissed back, trying in vain to push the larger boy off of him.

Hard fists came down into Gary's face. Over and over. Back and forth. And somehow, he couldn't help but smile. Feeling the numbess and the shock of pain.

"You were the last person Lola saw before she left and you're the reason Johnny's gone!"

The smile turned into a hearty laugh. Taking him off guard. Norton boomed with anger. "What's so funny, Smith?! Punch drunk already?"

"You'll never be half the leader Johnny was."

Norton's face twisted in fury as he poised to strike Gary again, but before he could swing, the side of his head was met with an ugly looking sneaker. He rolled off Gary and fell on his back, knocked out cold.

"You okay, Gary?"

Still recovering from the slight battering he took, he glanced over to where Hal had attacked Jimmy. There in the snow, were Peanut and Hal, both out cold as well. Guess the ginger really did know what he was doing after all.

Gary grinned through the blood the flowed between his teeth, the adrenaline wearing off, and the feeling of pain in his face slowly coming back. "Yeah, yeah, never been better."

Jimmy held out a hand to pull him up. Gary's eyes darted between the outstretched hand and Jimmy. A moment of debating before he finally took it, standing up with Jimmy and brushing the snow off him. Gary spat into the snow. Leaving orange stains in the pure white. "Thanks, but I had it under control, Jimmy."

"Yeah, being a punching bag is really under control, Gary." he chuckled. The ginger had gestured to Peanut and Hal. "What's all this about you being the last one to see Lola? Is that who you were fucking? Lola?"

"Jimmy. Just shut up. Let's go find Petey. He's probably laying where we left him."


	26. Half-Breed

Gary hunched into the door, pushing it open. Trying to get away from the frigid night air. Bell chiming. The smell of chopped animal bits and something... else flooded his senses.

In front of him, Stan was flipping through pages of a dirty magazine. Slumped into it. Stan didn't even care when Gary moved to the front of the counter, drumming his fingers with nervousness. And yet, Stan was still flipping away. Gary moved the garlic strands hanging from the ceiling from out of his face. Eyes moving to dirty magazines on display. Lighters. And then he saw them behind the counter. Cigarettes.

"Pack of cigarettes and a lighter." Gary was fumbling through bills, eyes shooting between the stack and Stan. Not even a hint of emotion when Stan looked up with ugly glazed eyes.

Shit. He should have thought of a better plan. Maybe it was too direct.

"Sure, whatever man. You look old enough, right? Right. Like, what kind man?"

"The... red kind?" He said hesitantly as Stan clicked the register a few times. Chiming happily as the exchange was quick.  
Thankfully, he stunk.

Gross.

But shit that was easier than he thought.

Slipping out to the side of the building, he slid into the brick wall. Taking in the cool winter air. The sky incredibly clear. Stars twinkling. Not a cloud to obscure.

He rooted through the foil, picking out a cigarette from the pack.

He didn't know what brand she smoked. But her lips resembled the packaging. Red. He placed the filter between his teeth. Holding the flame to the cigarette before the cherry soon lit. He wasn't really sure how it worked. Nobody in his family smoked.

He was coughing as soon as he inhaled. The cold air didn't help either. He hacked on the thickness. How it assaulted his lungs.

"Smoking now are we? That self destructive behavior is ever prevalent, Smith."

His head practically snapped. Spotting Aquaberry first. Then the cocky smile. Gord.

"Gord."

"How does it feel?" He purred. Appearing like a ghost. Acting so chummy.

"How does what feel?"

Gary grumbled as Gord wrapped and arm around Gary's shoulder as if he were a friend. "I heard what you did to that grease stain! It's been the news around school. And that you've been involved with her."

He just had to bring her into this.

Gary had decided to give the Aquaberry toting loser a shove with his arm. Quick. Into his ribs.

Gord just laughed.

"Don't try to escape it dear Smith. You're just another soul enraptured by her beauty. She is the Helen of Troy!" He gestured grandly with his hands. As if he were talking about a mythical woman being really immortalized. "The way she incites noises from you must have felt so erotic."

"You're so disgusting."

"And you're just denying what happened."

"It's a stupid rumor spread by idiots." Gary said shortly.

"A rumor is as good as it's salt. Knowledge is a monetary value, you know that. Money talks. So does a good rumor or two." Gord let out a huff. "Have you learned nothing, dear boy?"

"What's your point?"

"Come on gary. Where's that passion?You must have remembered all those nights you spent working on your footwork with Bif."

Something about Gord... Gary didn't like it. He was being direct. Aggressive. Annoying. He just wished his stupid face would melt off.

"That's the past. Who cares about all that? I don't. I haven't even tried to be apart of your little group since I started going to Bullworth! How pathetic."

"You quit showing up for swim team almost imediately. And then you dazzle the greasers with moves that someone else showed you. You're no commoner."

"Quit living in the past."

"Then you should leave her in the past. She's a fickle one. A little minx. Are you... in love with her?" The preppie hummed to himself. Studying Gary. A finger resting on his sharply cut jaw. When he had said love, Gary's blood ran cold. Like ice in his veins. Gord spoke again. "I saw it in your eyes that night when you saved me. You've loved her for so long. Ah, how sad. Unconditional love."

Gary snatched the cigarette hanging from his lip. Voice raising. "You read into me like you know me! You don't know anything." Gary's one hand held the cigarette between his fingers while the other balled into a fists. He wanted to slug the bastard in the lip.

"Is it true? Your mother, was a poor wastrel from New Coventry and your father, kicked out of Bullworth and then inherited his mass fortune. Maybe I was wrong. Maybe you aren't like us. But, Lola loves her fate. Cycles tend to repeat themselves."

Gary gnashed his teeth.

He hated his family.

Hated them.

They didn't understand him. They never even tried to be parents. They always thought of him like a burden. They wouldn't look at him. They wouldn't hold him. They were nobodies!

His father! His mother! His grandfather! All of them! It was all their fault he was so fucked!

And he hated to think about them.

Gord had no right bringing it up. And he noticed his mistake when Gary punched him in his jaw. Gord knocking back a bit.

"Shut the fuck up, Gord. Or I'll help stain your new sweater with your blood."

Gord held his jaw. Smiling. Rubbing it thoughtlessly. "Sorry. I must have struck a nerve. I don't mean to offend. Rumors and all." Gord held out his hand. "Please accept my appology."

Gary snatched it. Squeezing. Seething through clenched teeth. "You can shove your fucking apology."

"The way you just lose yourself in anger, it's a really unhealthy habit. Maybe I can cool you off." Gord said, yanking Gary close, tugging him by his hand. "If you ever decided to slum it with me, however, that would be really exciting, wouldn't you think?"

When Gary tried to remove his hand from Gord. Gord had just placed his other hand on his forearm. Mild panic starting to surge through Gary. The rich boy's body too close for comfort. The way he approached was like a predator. His stink coating him. The smell of richness. The ego. The arrogance. It was akin to Gary but off. He had grown a distaste for it.

"Fuck off, Gord. I should have left you to die-" Gary was cut off very unexpectedly. Eyes boring into his. Everytime Gary took a step back, Gord took two forward. Until Gary was pressed against the bricks of the wall. Gord's breath tickling Gary's face, cutting through the cold air.

"But you didn't. No more words. Please. Put that sordid mouth to good use to me."

"What the fuck-"

Gary felt his breath hitch as the prep's soft lips collided with Gary's chapped ones. Gary neither pushed away nor deepened the kiss. Frozen. Gord's eyes feathered shut. A moan slipping out of the rich boy's mouth. But Gary couldn't bring himself to shut his own eyes. Frozen in the snow. Hidden from the rest of Bullworth like a dirty secret.

The snow. The scenery. Everything was a distant moment. Why was Gary a sudden target of affection? He asked himself... why was he pushed in situations like this? Did he deserve this? Was he worthy of affection? Attraction? Lust? Was this a kiss that was forced like Pete? Was it like Lola's?

It made Gary's head swim. Not with attraction or lust, but with selfish feelings of his very ego.

He felt vunerable and stupid.

The smell of expensive cologne. The taste of chapstick. And mints. It was Gord. It wasn't like Pete's. And, disheartingly, neither like Lola.

His mouth melting into Gord's. But he wasn't sure why. Tongues moving as one. Fingers that held Gary's forearm leaving bruises. There was no arousal. No electric feelings that danced down his spine. But the feeling of his heart, thumping.

It confused him.

When Gord pulled away from the kiss they shared, he looked as smug as ever. "Aren't we just full of surprises?"

Gary couldn't look the boy in the eyes. Instead they held steadfast to the powdery snow under his feet and the cigarette that had fallen from between his fingers. He found the courage to say, "...get out of my face, moron."

"Ah, well. Hopefully you change your mind. Until next time, farewell, Smith." Gord had said. He could almost see his face when he had spoke in a soft yet condescending tone. Gord's warmth leaving him. Brown leather shoe stepping right onto the cigarette. Snubbing it out.

When he brought himself to look up, the preppie was gone.

Maybe Gord was right. Not about fucking him. Disgusting but... He had to let go. He looked up into the sky and wondered if she was looking too. Lola. Wherever she was... he'd like to think she was happy.


	27. Pete's Lament

The cold air blustered through the open door to the boy's dormitory as the trio rushed inside. The sound of three pairs of footsteps on the tile floor was followed by the slamming of the heavy wooden door, cutting off the blistering winds from the wintery wasteland outside.

The three were a mess to say the least. Gary's face was battered and bruised, speckled with half-frozen blood specks from his nose and mouth. Jimmy was relatively unharmed, but another tussle with the greasers had gotten some blood (theirs) on him, and the chilling winds had turned his pale complexion to a chafed red. And of course, Petey had even more remnants of egg yolk on his face and jacket, which at this point had chilled to the point of being a half-solid half-squishy goop.

The all stood in the lobby for a few seconds, still mentally recovering from their misadventures outside.

Jimmy was the one to finally break the silence. "I'm think I'm gonna go clean myself up." Petey chimed in, though his voice was muffled by the scarf he pulled up over his mouth. "Yeah, I should too. I'll meet you guys back here when we're all cleaned up."

Jimmy and Petey walked off towards their room, leaving Gary still standing in the doorway. Taking some time to ponder what had happened, Gary decided he'd stick around to see what Pete and Jimmy were up to, as long as it was indoors. While he'd have to admit that it was a rush pummeling the greasers, he'd had more than his fair share of freezing his ass off.

He made his way back to his room and started to change his clothes and clean himself up. His shirt made an excellent towel for wiping the blood off his face, and was subsequently tossed under his bed to be picked up later. As he changed into some warm pajamas, he couldn't help but dwell on what the greasers had said about him. Did they really know about what happened between him and Lola, or was it just some bullshit Johnny told them? Or did Johnny somehow get the whole picture of what had happened, had he found Lola and made her admit everything? Or-or maybe it was-

He stopped mid-thought, drawing a deep breath and sitting down on the foot of his bed. Gary quickly cleared his head of those thoughts. This was the first time in months that he'd have even a little bit of fun and he wasn't going to have it ruined by some stupid words that came out of gutter trash's mouth.

He stood back up and made his way to the lounge, he was going to go the rest of the day without thinking about that situation again, he was going to enjoy today. Fixating on it for so long is mentally unhealthy, and the last thing Gary wanted was another trip to Happy Volts for a "little check-up".

Jimmy and Petey were already sitting down in the chairs when Gary arrived. Jimmy continued the trend of dressing down for the occasion, and was in a dirty white t-shirt and some striped boxers. Petey was in a pajama onesie, with a matching rocket-ship print blanket. The two of them together set the scene of a deadbeat dad and his preschooler settling down for some afternoon TV.

"About time you showed up!" Jimmy complained, "What took you so long? Needed some extra time to put your makeup on?"

"Actually, I was taking time putting my clothes on like a civilized human." Gary snapped back.

"Hey man, I like being comfortable. And this is how I do it." Jimmy gestured to himself in a grandiose way. "Take it all in if you must."

"Whatever. So what's the plan Pete? Whatever it is it can't go as bad as Jimmy's outing went today."

Petey's eyes lit up with excitement, the floor was all his for once, and he didn't even have to fight for it. "Well, I was thinking that we could have a little movie party! Movies go really well with hot chocolate, and snacks go really well with movies!"

Gary sighed, what else could he expect from Petey. He decided to with the flow. Instead of being a hard stone on the bottom of their feet. "Fine, fine. What are we watching?"

Jimmy was out of his seat in a hot flash. Taking off into his room before visibly ruffling through drawers. A black VHS in his hands as he returned from the shithole that was his room. Jimmy handed the smaller boy the tape. Giving him a smirk. "Rewind the VHS and I'll get the snacks. Think you can handle it Pete?"

"Ah fuck, seriously?" Gary gaffed. "You'll get jumped by more greasers or something. Actually, nevermind. Get jumped. Hopefully then the greasers will bring snacks."

"Only snack they'd bring back is a knuckle sandwich." Jimmy had made it a point when he slammed his knuckles into his palm. "You both behave now. Go easy on Pete, Gary."

"Like I take orders from you!"

As soon as the dorm doors shut and Jimmy was gone, a dark cloud hung over the two.

The silence and distance between the two were immense. The boys dorm silent. Seeming like everyone was away for winter break. Well, except for Gary, Pete and Jimmy... and maybe a few others hiding in their dorm rooms.

Petey emerged from his cocoon to have the tape enter into the VCR. Taking the wonky, and damaged remote into his hands. Curling himself back into the blanket as he began the process that Jimmy entrusted him.

Winter break was as annoying as it gets.

Gary didn't really care. His parents never contacted him to see him on winter break. Nor did it surprise him.

They didn't see him in the asylum. Neither when he was released. Why would they now?

Gord was correct. His parents weren't exactly top of the line. And neither was his. Inbred idiot.

How dare he anyways? What a fuckin' loser.

"Hey Gary? Can I talk to you for a sec?" Petey said softly. Interrupting Gary's thoughts. He was wrapping his own blanket around himself. The starships and stars. It was something really immature someone would pick for a blanket. He resembled a cocoon with a lone hand sticking out. Pressing rubber buttons on a dingy remote.

"Aren't you already talking?" Gary said snidely. "Don't waste my time."

"God Gary, you're such a butthole." Petey muttered from his safety blanket. Eyes meeting the side of the floor.

"Can't even say asshole? Oh! Petey! How dare you curse! I'm gonna tell!"

"Quit it!"

Gary's ever changing moods and personality. Gary pondered why he felt so turbulent. Maybe the encounter with Gord a while ago put him in a mood.

The taste of mints still lingering in his mouth.

The kiss was disgusting. Unfathomably so. Next time he'd see Gord, he'd kick his ass for sure.

"Um, I was going to ask... Do you like it here?" His voice cracked on the last word.

"Here? What do you mean?" Gary had to ponder it for a second. He wasn't quite sure what he meant. His fast tracked mind went from to a geographical stand point to an existential one.

"Yeah, in Bullworth."

Bullworth was just a building. People going day by day. Teachers. Students. Gary. That was all of it. Just a building. An older building. And people.

"Isn't it obvious, little Pete? It stinks and it's infested with rats, but it's better than being home with my parents... or finding another school all together."

"You don't like them? Your parents? You never really talk about them." Pete said with a hint of surprise. Rewinding the tape. Pausing randomly. Trying to make sure the VCR and tape would play nice. Jimmy would kick his ass if the tape got destroyed after he gave to Petey. He was silently betting on it's distruction.

"Who wants to talk about their parents anyways? Your lame librarian dad, Jimmy's whore mom or my loser..." Gary stopped himself. Feeling an urge to punch Pete. It really didn't make much sense. But he wanted to end the conversation. "They don't understand anything."

"You're right. For once." Pete said with a twinkle in his eye.

Without hesitation, on the defensive, Gary's head whipped over to Petey."What's that supposed to mean?"

Pete cleared his throat. Eyes firmly locked on the TV in front of him. Gary could feel his legs bounce in place. Petey found the courage to speak, drawling.

"If you think about it, nobody really likes their parents. Well, maybe that's why I like Bullworth." He stopped for a moment. "Maybe a little bit."

Pete once again paused the tape. Seeing the still frame before some girl was bitten into by acoarse-furred grotesque beast. Pausing before the blood and viscera squirted out of the wound in her neck.

"...Maybe that's facetious of me." Pete had said to himself rather than to Gary. Thinking aloud. Pressing the remote into his lips. Looking deep in thought.

But all Gary could think about was about all the dried cum and other germs guys left all over the remote that Petey was actively pressing into his mouth. Fucking disgusting. "What do you think?"

"It's not." Gary had answered, easily in fact he didn't have to do anything thinking like Pete. "You actually think for yourself when you're here. Even if it is stupid. I bet your parents do everything for you. Including the thinking."

Petey started to emerge from the blanket. Letting out an awkward noise. "I feel like I have a lot more to say and to do being headboy. It makes me happy. And it gives me a purpose. But, to be honest, I feel as though I don't deserve it." Petey said quietly. Awkwardly shifting from side to side in his seat. The green couch was uncomfortable as it was. "Jimmy works really hard. And he does have everyone's best intentions in mind-"

A voice kept echoing in his head. Louder and louder with each passing word. That Pete was weak and that's why Gary would always be the strongest. He wouldn't admit such a fault.

"Gary? Are you even listening?"

Gary practically exploded into a rage at Petey's inquisitiveness."You have Jimmy wrapped around your finger. Jimmy can't think for himself. He's needs someone making the orders. He's a moron and a yes man. Someone like that needs direction. Did you learn nothing from me?"

"Jimmy makes good decisions on his own... sometimes."

"Yeah, sometimes."

"What I'm getting at is that I just wish I could be like you or Jimmy. You're really... well... you-" Petey inhaled. "You're people I look up to, well, when you're both acting like normal people. You're both strong in your own ways. You both have your own lives and you both do what you want. You sometimes don't care about the repercussions. And sometimes I-."

"Sometimes what? You think I'm a goddamn role model?!"

"I'm serious Gary! You've changed a lot and you seem like you want to be better too. And, you're not scheming or trying to hurt people." He said. "Even if you are, even behind me and Jimmy's back, at least you've been like friends to us. Like old times." Pete seemed to reminisce and leave out the part where Gary took over the school and got Jimmy expelled... and tossed heavy rock and machinery to throw him off the top of the school to his death. Romanticizing things that shouldn't have been so well received. Even now.

"Things don't just go back to how they were like that. The past is the past. I guess we're close again but not everything stays the same Pete." He said with deep seeded disgust at Petey's innocent looks.

"Yeah, but I really felt hurt and betrayed when you left us. When you went crazy and just cut everyone out of your life. I felt as though I had friends. And then you left."

Gary clenched his teethbefore opening them like a canine about to jump their prey. "Quit prying you shitstain!"

"But I want to know why you did it."

"You wanna be like me? Right? Cry me a fuckin' river. You're a self fulfilling prophecy. If you think you're a failure, you're gonna be a failure. Pete. I get you look up to me and Jimmy, but you have to be your own person. You aren't me and Jimmy. You're Petey. Femmeboy. A fucking moron. Jimmy and I get irritated with you. And sometimes I hate your guts especially."

Petey frowned deeply at Gary's long winded speech. It made him almost forget he was rewinding the tape. As it had started to make a noise. A grinding one. He pressed the stop button quickly. And when his eyes met Gary's he was even closer. Making the blood in Pete go cold.

"You wanna be like me. Control others around you. Cut ties. Hurt people for the fun of it. Make everyone pay. Watch it all burn to the ground. Even the school. Your friends. Loved ones. Everyone. They just hold you down!" Gary said rather sadistically. "Make bad choices. Make a lot of them. Watch the result."

Pete made a noise of fear as Gary reared his foot, kicking him off the side of the couch and onto his stomach. When he pulled himself up with a pathetic moan, Gary was onto the bright side.

"But you are who you are. And you can't change that. Unfortunately. If you pretend like someone your not, you'd be some kind of aquaberry toting loser. Then I'll really have to distance myself from you losers." Gary said rather snidely. He wasn't sure why but Pete was smiling now. Warmly. His eyes wandering to the left.

There was a creak behind them when Gary felt something ice cold against his neck. He jumped with a shriek. Glaring at Jimmy who practically laughed in his face. Shoving a beam cola in his hands. "You both getting mushy? Or maybe an after school special?"

"Petey here is having a crisis."

"Sounds about right. Jimmy vaulted over the side of the couch. Plopping down into the ugly green cushions. Screaming as Jimmy landed. Fat ass. "Looks like you can handle some responsibility. You ready to watch this lame movie?"

"Yeah! What is it?" Petey pipped loudly.

"Werewolf in a Girls' Dormitory. You like werewolves, right Pete?" Jimmy prodded. "Some say that there's a real werewolf on campus! They prey on the guys around Bullworth and turn em into snarling beasts. Big teeth and sharp claws. They just wanna bite and scratch!"

"Sounds kind of homoerotic."

"They're all hairy and awkward." Pete said, "Long finger nails and unbrushed teeth."

"Not like you, hm?"

"Gary shut up!"

Those were the moments Gary remembered most. Disdain. Fights. Watching shitty movies.


	28. Homecoming

"Oh, well, I guess we'll see you around!" Petey waved to the other boy. "We'll have to hang out again."

"Yeah, yeah. Don't cream yourself, Petey."

"Night, Gary." Jimmy said without another word, leading the way as Petey followed in the opposite direction down the boy's dormitory.

Going out for a walk with the boys always lead to shenanigans. Whether it be trashing mailboxes or hitting cars with slingshots. All the while Petey whining.

Something about it made Gary feel a zest for something...

He felt like starting an argument with Jimmy or tossing Pete around a little.

His life was missing a chaotic element.

Gary shut the door behind him with an exaggerated sigh. He took one look at the bed before tossing himself onto it, sinking into the disgusting mattress. Word around the school was Johnny was back. Gary's reputation was only slightly repaired... but he wondered why he wasn't killed in his sleep by the greasey gearhead. There was no sign of Lola.

And the constant conflicts didn't help, but they all suddenly stopped a week ago when Johnny arrived. Sadly.

Gary laid there with a frown. Eyes feathering close for a moment.

In his dreams, he could see the gladiator's ring. Familiar yet it had a long time that he dreampt this dream. Except the busy Roman architecture was all too abandoned. When the boy had peered around to his subjects, he found none. Nobody but himself. The sound of scraping stones filled the air. The throne beneath him began to crumble.

He couldn't yell for help. Who would hear him? Nobody was in the Colosseum except him. The throne was abandoned as he fell forward and into the center of the ring.

Gary wasn't sure how he was thrusted into the ring. But he was helpless as the gates opened, revealing a bull. A bull who's horns curled towards him menacingly. Ready to gore him.

When it had charged, Gary's feet seemed glued to the ground.

Gary jumped from his sleep. Panting and with a yelp, something landed in his lap. With a curious nudge, his eyes focused on the thing. A book.

Almost as if it materialized. It was his book. The library book. The one that Lola had. That she stole.

Gary smudged his eyes roughly before fumbling with the book. Inside the cover was sweet writing with a shitty ball point pen.

'Waiting for you at our overlook'

Overlook.

Gary reread the sentence again and again.

It took a moment to process it all. Before he knew it, he was putting on his scarf and jacket. This could have been the Constantinos incident all over again.

However, he didn't have the time to check.

He burst out of his dorm room and into the halls, struggling to slip into his combat boots. He licked his lips anxiously, finding his tongue drag slowly. And a taste on his buds.

He placed his fingers to his bottom lip, looking down at the red substance.

It was her, he just knew it.

The woman that lived in the front of his brain. The one he wished to have saw since she left. The voice that he heard in every room.

When the ice and snow clogged his vision he made it above the hill.

Gary could hardly believe his eyes. Was it really Lola back again? Or was it just his mind playing tricks on him? It was early in the morning, dark, and he was tired, it couldn't have been her, right? But he had to get closer and check, just to be sure. He crept off the noisy gravel road and into the powdery snow. Trying to remain hidden in the darkness as he approached the lot.

It couldn't have been... could it?

With a better view, he could see a color cutting through the darkness. Red. The hum of the bike echoing.

The scent of cigarette smoke emanating from the person made his stomach churn as he drew nearer. His initial nervousness in approaching her was immediately worsened by the feeling of familiarity that swept over him. The smoke, the view of the carnival, the sound of the vespa, and the slowly growing urge to throw up like he had all that time ago. Still, Gary stifled those feelings, and pushed on until he was within a stone's throw of the bike.

The woman turned her head slightly. Her eyes on him. She killed the engine. Sliding the helmet off. Hair failing. That familiar auburn haircut. And perfectly drawn red lips.

She placed her hands on her hips. Speaking. "You're late."

It was really her.

He'd heard what she said. Those two simple words. But he didn't answer, he couldn't. He stood there, dumbfounded, still trying to come to terms that Lola had reappeared out of the blue. "Hey, did you hear me?" she continued cooly. "You're late, do you have anything to say for yourself?"

"You." Is all he could bring himself to say. Feeling his body tremble.

She snorted at this. Coming closer and setting her hands on his shoulders. "Is that all your gonna say, baby boy? I was expecting a drawn out romantic speech."

The words wouldn't come. Gary's head hung. Like a small child, he avoided her gaze.

He felt Lola's leather gloved fingers on his chin as she pulled his head up. His eyes looking off in another direction. She let out a noise of irritation. "Look at me."

When his eyes finally had met hers, he could only attempt to squander away any feelings that showed on his face.

"You don't have to say anything. Although, it'd make me happy if you would. I'm glad to see you. Maybe even looking forward to it." The woman bent down, laying a kiss on his forehead, which was enough for Gary's heart to start beating out of his chest. "And don't worry baby," she continued, her voice returning to the sickly sweet tone he knew all too well. "I'm not mad you kept me waiting so long. I heard all about how you got tangled up on your way back, so we're all still peachy."

She moved her hands from his shoulders down to his arms and started to pull him towards her vespa, and towards the overlook. When they arrived at her scooter, she sat down on the driver's seat and patted the spot next to her, tugging the leather gloves off. Resting. "So, come take a seat and tell me what you've been up to." She smiled slyly. "Then I promise I'll tell you what I've been doing while I took my 'vacation'."

Still overcome with shock, he found himself unable to sit next to her.

"I waited for you to show up." He said honestly. Taking Lola aback. He felt his fist clench as he let out a growl. "Why did you have to run away like that? Why were you such an idiot? You can't just abandon me! That's what I do! Lola, you- you-" he found himself choking up. His words losing themselves in his throat. Dissipating."You're pathetic."

Lola's mouth turned into a frown. A sigh escaping her lips. It was too early to be so existential and mushy. She gestured to the the dim pink sky overhead. "You don't like looking at the sights anymore? Isn't that your thing? Come on, Gary."

The pink sky and the smell of salt. It didn't matter. He didn't wish to see the sights like the way he missed her. She was here. In a grasp. But yet acting like she didn't see him. "Why aren't you answering my questions?" he said, growing more and more impatient "I want some answe-"

"Gary, please." the sound of irritation more and more present in her voice. "I'd really prefer if you just relax and shut up. Not to be a bitch, but I really just want to enjoy this moment, alright?"

"How can everything just go back to the way it was? I can't just pretend that you weren't gone for months. That's stupid." Gary took a breath before letting it out loudly. "I..."

He itched back and forth. Unsteady. Fit of nervousness taking over.

In comparison to Lola, he felt as though he were two feet tall, trying to make the words appear. He was agitated and aggravated that they wouldn't come so naturally.

"Are you going to leave again?"

Lola puffed on her cigarette. The ash being discarded with a quick flick. She was supposed to answer his questions. There were so many. And his heart heavy with each one.

"Lola."

"Sure, I'll answer. But... What was your answer?" She said with a hum. Her eyes laying on him. Sharp. Devilish. "What would you have done that night? Would you have thrown everything away and ran away with me? Go with me wherever? Whenever?"

Shock ran through him. He wasn't sure how to respond. His jaw locking.

Gary expected the worst of people, but this was ridiculous.

"Just say it, Gary. You need me. You need me like air in your lungs. Tell me." A finger brushed against his bottom lip. "Gary Smith, maybe I need you too."

Gary's eyes darted from her to the trees. To the ground. To the sky. "You're gonna regret sayin' that."

"I know you wanted to baby, but I want to hear those words come out of your mouth." That night had seemed like a distant memory so, so long ago. Halloween night, the bike tires, her room, her invitation, and the greasers. It all came back so fast, his chest tightened with anxiety.

"I wanted to..." He started.

"Wanted?"

"I wanted to but I decided that this place is like my home. I don't want to run away from it. I worked hard to come back. I wanted to tell you that I wanted to stay. And I wanted to convince you to stay, too." Gary let out a noise. Ambivalent. "I know I wouldn't have been able to."

Lola's eyebrows knitted low for a moment. Before rising in disbelief. He could tell she didn't like what she heard. "You'd pick a school over me?"

He was silent for a moment.

"I can't go."

She stopped.

A wave came over him. Crashing down. The weight unbearble. "I couldn't have gone with you, you idiot."

When she didn't answer it made him uneasy.

Unsteady breaths and unusual feelings stirring. Like a melting pot of emotions he wasn't sure he possessed. He wiped at his eyes preemptively.

Lola stared at him for a little while in shock. The shoe seemed to be on the other foot now, as she was the one left speechless. Regaining her composure to the best of her ability, she spoke. "Come on, don't get so upset." She pulled him closer.

Something snapped. That rope inside his chest holding his puny heart broke. His heart becoming heavier than a boulder. His eyes hot. His face hot. His fingers twitching.

"Just don't leave me." He wrapped himself around her. Holding her tightly, as if she would evaporate from his arms. He dismissed the creeping feelings of regret. "I hate myself for missing you. And I really hated myself just thinking about you. I'm not supposed to. I'm not supposed to be like that." His fingers dug into her leather jacket. His legs trembling.

She was taken aback.

"I'm sorry."

Gary was never sorry.

Something was wrong.

Maybe he was still dreaming.

There were no exits. No escape. Just Gary. Just Lola. Cornered. Exposed.

"...Gary." the surprise in her voice mixed into a comforting one. "I-I don't plan on going anywhere anytime soon." Though her confidence was slowly coming back, she was still caught off guard, and continued after a nervous chuckle. "All you had to say is that you missed me. Gosh, you're gonna leave stains in my cashmere." Gary could've sworn he felt just a hint of sincerity in her voice, but whether or not that was wishful thinking or not, he wasn't sure.

She tugged him off of her. Prying him away like a fly off of a sticky trap.

"Gary, Gary, Gary. I thought your heart rotted out of your chest. Now here you are. I'm flattered. Maybe a little too much." She wiped a stray tear with an immaculate red polished thumb.

Gary's hand cupped her own. He reached up, planting a kiss onto her lips.

Maybe she was right? He wondered if he mimicked the stupid feelings that Jimmy and Petey had. They were all fabricated. It put his mind at ease for the moment. At least before he felt himself gag. Instictively putting a hand to his mouth.

She held her hands up protectively as to not get sprayed by the teen.

Gary backed away from the scooter, doing his best to not vomit all over the place. He staggered over the ditch and took his hand off of his mouth, and threw up. As unpleasant as it felt coughing up his innards, in a sick kinda way it did make him feel better. Like all of the anxiety, stress, emotional bullshit, and everything was leaving him all at the same time. His throat still burned like hell, but at least his head and heart would stop pounding soon enough.

"Jesus Gary, you'd better not be making a habit out of this." he heard Lola chime in from behind him. "I swear, the next time I take you here and you get sick again, I'm gonna a throw you off the cliff, you understand?" Gary let out a weak chuckle to himself. As long as she didnt bring up that mushy shit again, he'd be just fine.


	29. Laundry

The small diner was empty except for a few whitecapped old people scattered about. The smell of eggs and bacon permeated the air, wafting over to him, half making him feel sick. Like a nursing home, or maybe worse.

Purgatory.

He felt warmth again as a hand placed itself on his thigh. Her fingers rubbing small circles into the fabric. It incited a small gasp from Gary. Which only made him cringe.

Idiot.

Lola poured creamer into the heavy duty porcelain cup. The spoon chiming inside of it as she stirred.

"You sure are quiet. I was expecting something else."

"Can you blame me? It's like I've seen a ghost."

Meanwhile, Gary returned to thumbing a packet of jams. Using it as a stress ball. Trying to ignore the mood Lola seemed to come over. Gary cleared his throat, charming as ever as he spoke. "Did you hear that Johnny came back? Looks like he didn't find you."

"Obviously. Though, I'm not surprised. He's usually a little more enthusiastic." Lola placed the cup to her lips. Speaking before sipping. Clearing her throat. "Anyways, back to me. My vacation, oh god Gary. There's a whole world out there. It helped me clear my head but coming back to this shithole never helps. It's no good, you know?"

She set the cup back down on the serving plate with a clank. Hair curtaining her face as she rose the spoon that was sturring her coffee between her lips.

"But isn't that what a vacation is?"

She removed the spoon with a solemn expression. "It hasn't been the first time I took off and it won't be the last. Sometimes I like to take a break from it all. Stretch out my wings. I don't want to settle down in some ocean side town forever." Lola let out a little sound of insecurity. The pressure on his leg increasing. "Sometimes I think that maybe... maybe I can just hop on my scooter and runaway from everything. Maybe, when I come back everything will go back to normal."

"Who's the hobo now?" Gary said with a bit of disdain. "When I left Bullworth for a little while, I was a "troubled soul" and now here you are, doing the exact same shit."

"I guess, we share the same soul then." She stretched out, her bones creaking loudly. Lola's lips curling into a big smile. "Besides, I had a lot of fun. Too bad you were too busy at a dumb school. Next time, we'll go, just the two of us. We can see the sights and-"

She cut herself off. Overcame in a moment that only she seemed to be apart of.

Gary was quiet for a moment. Turning his head towards the window. Dawn was breaking in colors. "You think Johnny just gave up?"

"You didn't find me either."

"I didn't look for you."

"At least Johnny looked for me. I looked for you. It's only fair."

It was quiet again. Lola's eyes down at the coffee. Stirring the liquid again. Watching billows of creme mix with the black substance, turning it a caramel color. "Have... have you seen him and Mandy? Have you heard anything?"

"Mandy and Johnny? Well, old news from Halloween. You already know about that though." Gary rested his cheek in the palm of his hand. "Did you break up with him or are you guys on a break...?"

"It's complicated." Lola said with a charismatic smile. "You know, I prefer it that way. I hate dating someone exclusively. I'm someone who always wants more. But I hate it when someone wants more than me. I mean, I'm the most striking woman in Bullworth!"

"When is it enough? Those who want everything end up with nothing, afterall. Quit being stupid."

Lola rose the cup to her lips. "And pride comes before the fall. Midget."

Gary picked at the jam containers. Peach jam? Fucking disgusting. "Touche."

"I can't believe you chose a school over me. What a fucking joke." A hand spread across his crotch, fumbing down, rubbing him roughly. "You know I never finished you off. I wanna pop that cherry."

Gary placed his hand on hers, struggling to pull her off.

"Lola, Jesus. Can you not jerk me off here."

"Admit it! You missed me."

Gary felt helpless as the curious hand of Lola's fumbled with fabric before undoing a button. It made Gary uneasy. Sure it was incredibly quiet in the diner but he hated this type of shit. It something Zoe and Jimmy would do.

Gary couldn't speak so instead he put a firm hand on top of hers. Cupping the hand making busywork of his pants.

Gary's rough hand and Lola's smooth hand. He gripped it. Hand almost holding hers. It was a moment of awkwardness.

Showing affection was one thing. Accidently showing affection was another.

Lola noticed this and pulled her hand away with a cackle. "You've changed a bit while I was gone. All that character development for me?"

"As if!"

He looked at her smug face as she interlaced her fingers with his.

Her perfect red polished nails and his chipped ones. Her hands were slightly calloused from long journeys while his were smooth.

There were invisible ribbons in his stomach appeared once more. The feeling of them tugging tightly into knots and then the feeling of heat in his face and crotch. Something about the woman destroyed him. He hated it.  
Hated her.

Why did she have to come back.

A twinge of lust rippled through him. His heart beating a little faster as she pressed her body closer to him. Her breasts nudging his upper arm.

But her physical presence was welcomed. Maybe, for a little while longer.

Lola's eyes narrowed. Probably sensing it. Knowing it.

"Would you like to start where we left off, Gary?"

"You're an idiot."

"And you're my baby boy."

Lola's lips landed on his for a moment. And he was half tempted to move into her lips.

Gary jumped when the old wrinkled hag shuffled to the two, pouring more coffee for Lola. Gary, spotting the crow, practically tossed Lola away. The waitress (if you could have even called her that) gave the two a look of repugnance.

"Anyways, about Johnny. Could you... I dunno, see how he is doing? Who he's doing?"

"Is this why we're here? To discuss your dirty work?" Gary's brows furrowed. "You're too afraid to find out he doesn't really care or something?"

"Look. Can't you shut up and do what you're told?"

Gary, tempted to pour the scolding hot coffee on the woman' head, decided to answer simply. "I don't take orders from you."

"Then you're useless to me." Lola got up from the booth seat. "Thanks for breakfast."


	30. Fair Sex

Gary fell back into that spiral. He thought Lola coming back would have made him feel better.

It didn't. And somehow he felt worse.

Lola's homecoming wasn't as different he expected. It was all over the school that morning when one foot stepped back through those gates. Everyone talked. Everyone gossiped. The same as they always did.

He couldn't shake that guilt.

Gary felt disgusted. The morning in the diner was proof that she just used him. He remembered sitting there. Almost dumbfounded but not surprised.

But she was always there, toying with him like some mind control. He remembered her pawing at his crotch and his thoughts trailed back to Halloween.

He could remember her body and the feeling of her warm skin as if it were a midsummer smell of leather and cherries. Her perky breasts and her curves that he had ran his hands over. Her weight heavy on his crotch, straddling him, as if he couldn't escape. The pads of his fingers mapping each bump and divot of muscle, every goosebump that erupted on her skin, and every imperfection. If only he could have ran his tongue over each valley, claiming them for himself. Conquering her like he knew he could.

He could hear her voice in his head. Echoing. "Fuck me, baby boy."

He would bite her. Mark her. Make her bleed. Raking his jagged nails down her back. He long desired to wrap his hands around her neck, as he did so long ago in the motel, and squeeze.

Gary licked his finger, wetting it as he turned a page in his book. Finally able to read it. Caesar and his stupid Gallic war.

Caesar had his temptations. Maybe not an epicureanist, but plenty of debauchery. He had to keep his mind clear and focused. But when he tried to, his mind wandered and became foggy.

But the dusty old book meant so much more than war, or Caesar.

It made him remember her. Which made him both mad and something else entirely.

His eyebrows furrowed as his groin burned with a insatiable desire. His cheeks probably pinkier than usual. Maybe he shouldn't have been letting his mind wander on the couch?

Petey let out a loud noise of frustration. He fidgeted as the ginger stood over him. As a father would. Arms crossed tightly over his chest and everything. "Come on, Jimmy! You know we can't cut funding to swim team! That'll cause a fuss and you know it. Do we really need that attention right now?"

"Whatever man, you're biased."

"Am not!"

"Says the guy who watches swimming on tv!" Jimmy gestured to the glowing television behind him. Practically teasing the boy. Which only made Peter sink even more into the ugly couch.

Gary pressed his hand into his cheek. Holding his book near his crotch. Giving the two a side glance.

"W-what I do in my own time is my business. Come on Jimmy! You know we gotta figure this out. Quit being a jerk."

If only his thoughts could wander, he thought. He was happy that the sudden outburst, he ignore the throbbing. "Can you both eat nails and shut the fuck up?" Gary once again looked up from his book. "I'm trying to read."

"You got any idea on what to do to help the school budget? Pete here doesnt want to cut anything."

Gary let out an exasperated sigh. Lolling his neck like an owl. Releasing a bit of tension. "Have no idea. Something gay? A bake sale or something?"

"A bake sale?!" Pete pulled himself out of the slump and embarassment. "Wait, that's a great idea!"

"No, no, no, Pete. Come on, a bake sale? Who's gonna do all that baking? Cuz I know it's not gonna be me." Jimmy complained. "Jesus Christ, thanks."

"Well, I'd be doing some of it, but you can expect me to just do it all alone?"

"That is true, so I think it'd only be fair that the guy who came up with the idea gets to work too." He eyed Gary with a mocking smirk.

"I just gave femmeboy the opportunity to keep watching the boy's swimming team, I've done my part." Gary said dismissively, waving his free hand at the two.. "So why don't you two go and piss off to somewhere else."

Jimmy's eyebrow raised in surprise from the sudden hostility. "What the hell crawled up your ass? It was a joke, not a threat."

Gary shut his book loudly, causing Pete beside him to jump. "What part of 'I'm trying to read' did you not understand? I can say it slower if you want."

Jimmy stomped in front of Gary, leaning down and getting uncomfortably close. "Why do you think we got rooms, huh? Why don't you piss off?"

"Your breath stinks." Gary stated simply. Making Jimmy recoil slowly with that same stupid scowl he always had.

There was a slam.

The door to the boy's dorm had opened and voices surrounding the entrance got louder and louder, from whispers to shouting, until there was a shriek.

"Oh, god, help us! There's a girl on the premises!" He could hear a nerd belt.

"Zoe, I presume?"

"Nah, she wouldn't show up without at least giving me a heads up..."

Jimmy started out of the room and down the hallway where all the commotion was, yelling over it. "Shut it you guys, who's room is she in? Who's even in there?"

Gary's eyes got wide as Jimmy made a turn down the hallway leading to his room. The room he hoped desperately was empty, and not harbouring that succubus.

He sprang from the couch and started to quickly stride towards the double doors leading out of the buidling. There's no way in hell she'd be brazen enough to waltz into his room in broad daylight, but just in case, it wouldn't hurt to be on the other side of campus where no one would find him.

He'd barely made it through the lounge doorframe when Jimmy's mocking tone stopped him. "Gary, get your ass over here. It's not nice to keep your guests waiting."

Glancing down the hallway, he was met with a dozen or so eyes. He saw a mixed selection of amusement, shock, and confusion in them as he trudged towards his dorm room. Like the host on a game show, Jimmy stood next to his door with that stupid smug look on his face, all too eager to reveal what was behind door #1.

Lola's heel was clacking against the wooden floor. Falling to her knees, presenting herself to the two as she wiggled down. She was pawing under his bed.

Under his bed was nothing but things he wanted to forget. The letters. Objects. Empty pill bottles. She was practically pawing through his subconscious. Quite literally.

Whatever trace of erection was long gone at this point. Happily.

"Lola, what in the fuck are you doing?" Gary spat. Enunciating each word with so much malice he could barely contain himself.

"What? Can't your sun, moon and stars enter your abode without an invitation?" She rose and turned to the two. Hip cocked, shrugging. "And here I thought you would roll out the red carpet? And all I get is the dragon's breath!"

Jimmy snickered to himself as Gary slammed a hand near his face. Knocking the door back. Practically enough to send it through the other side of the wall. "What are you laughing about? Huh?" Gary snarled. "Tell Pete to get this trash out of my room!"

"Nah." Jimmy quipped.

"You fucking-" Gary was cut off at the feeling of a something hitting him in the back. Practically taking the wind out of his lungs. Gary craned back to see the woman had pawed out the baseball bat he had stolen all that time ago from the gym. Back when he was paranoid and plagued with mental unrest.

"Call me trash again and I might have to paralyze you."

He turned his head to Jimmy, flashing him an inignant glare.

"C'mon Gary, she's your guest, so she's your responsibility." Was all Gary got in return. "I figure you two lovebirds could really use some alone time right about now, so I'll just leave you to it." Jimmy turned on his heel and left the room, closing the door behind him. Though just before it clicked shut, he cheekily whispered through the gap. "Just make sure to keep it down, would ya?"

Gary slammed his fist against the closed door, half in anger, half wishing it'd be enough to slam it open into Jimmy's face. Taking a deep breath, he turned back around to Lola, who was sitting cross legged on his bed, baseball bat resting to her side, acting as if she didn't just assault him just a couple seconds ago.

"Well, are you just gonna keep me waiting again? Why don't you say something?"

"Sure, what the fuck are doing in my room?"

"Tsk tsk, not what I was hoping to hear." Lola chirped as she tapped her fingernails against the bat. "Try again, how about a 'Thanks for coming to visit, I'm just so lonely and bored in my shitty little room'."

Lola's eyes sharpened as Gary paced back and forth. Practically tearing out his hair. "Are you a fucking idiot? Coming in my room? Everyone knows you're here now! Everyone associates me with you anyways and this confirms everyone's suspicion! And the greasers finally got off my back." His heart pounded in his chest. His weaseling. His reputation. It could all come crashing down. "You crossed a line."

Lola laid back on his bed. Causing it to creak loudly. A mischievous smile spreading across her face. "A boy like you needs his lines pushed a little. I'm doing you a favor, baby." The sultry woman licked her lips, biting the lower as she hissed. "Come on, baby boy. I'm all alone in your room and I'm more than willing." Her hands roaming over her own body. Her stomach exposed, a flash of exposed skin peeking from under a pink sweater. "No prying eyes and nobody to break in this time."

With a hesitant look, he slowly crawled on top on her. The bed dipping under his weight as he straddled her. Pinning her. Digits running over her cheeks before settling at her neck. "Why are you here? Answer or I'll snap your neck like the pathetic whore you are."

"Now you're really impressing me."

"Lola." He said sternly.

"...I want you to tail Johnny."

It was like he was watching it all unfold, like an out of body experience. Winding his fingers tighter around her thin neck, causing the woman under him let out a drawn out gasp. Opening his mouth slightly, he silenced her. Kissing her. When he broke from her lips, he could only stare down at her as she panted in pleasure.

"You really are pathetic." He felt her squirm as he put more pressure on his throat. The aching feeling returning. "Still hung up on Johnny, but you're practically begging me to fuck you?"

"I'm not a one man kind of girl. I've got way too much love to give for one person."

"You're diluted."

"Sometimes I think we're all just freaks in a big freak show."

"Whatever."

"Well, as your reward for tailing Johnny, I'll wait for you as long as you want next time." A hand set on his cheek. "We can run away. Together this time."

Her thumb rubbed tender circles into his cheek. It only made him hot all over. Not really in the way he had felt previously. His throat tightened. Her dark pools searching for something in his. "Are you really that stupid?" Gary spoke rough, losing his voice near the end. "I told you, I can't go."

"Maybe the next town over then. Come on."

He pressed himself down. Nearly inches from her lips as he whispered.

"Get the fuck out of my room."


End file.
